Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Do you buy second-hand clothes?
INTERNATIONAL NESTIE LIST
Tell your friend she's a snob.
I haven't bought many clothes (got a lot at the shower), but Alaina has a ton of hand me downs that I got from a friend. What I have bought, I just get at Wal-Mart or Target. Cheap.
My parents are really into yard sales so DS has a lot of secondhand clothes. I think it is crazy not to use them because DS has clothes with tags still on that he is already grown out of. It is such a waste. Yesterday my mom was at her church rummage sale and got DS five items for 5 cents each... so a total of a quarter for a couple onesies, a sweater, a pair of pants and a bib.
Obviously you are washing the clothes first, so I don't see what the big deal is.
Us: Me (27) Hubby (27) Married since 7/24/10
BFP #1: 10/30/2007 DS born 06/20/2008
BFP#2 09/11/2014 DD born 05/01/2015
jenfairies- Yeah...unfortunately my friend is kind of a snob. She comes from a "silver-spoon" background. Her and I are on completely different ends of the scale. ***NOTE: She's more of an?acquaintance?than a real friend.?
I buy both new and used. I am picky about used stuff, but if it is in good condition with no tears, holes, stains etc, then I will buy it. At a rummage sale this summer, I got DD 2 pairs of brand new jeans with the tags still on, for $1 each, along with 2 pairs of jeans that looked brand new but had no tags, for 25 cents each, Not too shabby :-)
I have also been to Once Upon a Child before, and remember finding some good deals. I would go more often, only the nearest one is a few hours away from me. It was before DD #1 was born that I was there.
I make sure that the clothes are in good condition and wash them- that is it!
I haven't bought any but probably would. What's the difference if a friend gives you clothes in the same condition and you wash them?
My sister keeps giving me boxes and boxes of clothes from my niece. DD has enough clothes to cover 5 kids until at least the 12 month size right now. haha
Malakai - 8.3.09
Ezra - 12.1.11 ASD
sort of...we have a boutique resale shop "Kids Carousel" where I cosign DD's clothes. I use the money in my account there to get other previously worn clothes.
So, while I am not buying them w/ cash, I do use them! I pph handmedowns. I love giving them to people who can use them, and I love receiving them.
I even like to send them to Nesties if I know they have a kid that will fit the right gender/size. It's good for the planet to recycle!!
YES!! I have packed up so many things that DS has only worn once, or even not at all. I definately buy/use second hand. Some things cama from a yard sale, some things were givin to me by my cousin who has a little boy. They grow way too fast to buy ONLY brand new clothes.
Well, I have a nephew that is only about a year older than Ethan, so we get a ton of nice hand-me-downs from him. I haven't really had to buy any.
BUT, I would TOTALLY buy 2nd hand. I think that it is not only economical, but environmentally friendly. The clothes are in great shape most of the time because kids grow so fast, and you aren't contributing to the waste stream by purchasing new stuff.
I am ALL ABOUT 2nd hand stuff.
Baby and infant clothes, yes.
Evan's bigger-kid clothes I just buy new since toddlers beat the crap out of their clothes.
But for babies, I don't mind buying second hand. MOst times, babies are out of the clothes before they've really even worn them.