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Baptism & after party questions
MCC1010
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in Baby Showers
I am asking here because everyone is frank and honest. Besides there is no other place on this site for these types of questions. I am having a disagreement with my mother & MIL about the following:
- Are you supposed to invite people to attend both or can you just invite them to the party? The church where the ceremony will be held is over an hour away from where the party will be held. I say you invite them to both and let them choose. MIL & my mom say to just invite them to the party. WDYT?
- Since the ceremony is scheduled for noon I feel like I should serve food not just snacks at the party. MIL and my mom think there should just be snacks and cake. The party would start around 2 pm and if they attend the ceremony they wouldn't get to have lunch.
- Do you have to invite everyone who was invited to the baby shower? I wanted to keep this family + close friends only. My mother and MIL insist that I invite everyone who was invited to the shower. They have even suggested I invite everyone who was invited to our wedding last year. I do not think that is the norm. Am I wrong?
Thank you for your advice and input!
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Re: Baptism & after party questions
vegan mama, military wife
1. Invite them to both
2. Serve food
3. Invite whoever you want.
This exactly. Our ceremony was at 10, but by the time everyone got to our house it was almost 12. We just did pizza and cake, and had chips and stuff. I know it wasn't the healthiest but pizza was a cheap way to feed a lot of people (if you are worried about cost). We had under 20 people at the baptism - kept it to parents, grandparents, siblings, 2 aunts, and 3 of our closest friends. I don't feel like you need to invite everyone - we wanted to share it with those we are closest to. We had a lot of extended family at the shower - it was great to see them, but not to have at the baptism.
1) invite to both
2) absolutley feed them
3) I would keep it to family and very close friends. At ours, outside of family, we only invited one couple who are like a third set of grandparents to our child (very very close family friends). IMO it looks immensely gift grabby to have a huge ordeal when you already had a baby shower.
I'm pretty much on the same page as everyone else. A few other thoughts.
1- Yes, both. Here's the thing. To me, this is like a wedding. The whole point of the day is the baptism. I don't understand why you'd invite someone to a party that is for an event they arent' invited to.
2- Yes, provide lunch.
3- No! The only related events are wedding showers and weddings. If invited to a wedding shower, they HAVE to be invited to the wedding. Outside of that, every one of these events are individual, stand alone events. Who you invite to one plays absolutely no role in you who invite another. To be honest, there are some people in my life that I'm not close to. If I were invited to their wedding and then started getting invited to EVERY "life event" party of theirs, I'd start to think they are way to self-important.
My last comment - while they obviously have their opinions, this isn't THEIR event.. This is YOUR and your DH's event. You and your DH just need to say "Thanks for your opinion, but this is what we're doing.". And if necessary, even through in a "back off".
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
We don't have Baptisms...we do Baby Dedications but they are similar. I think with Baptisms it is more of a "private" setting? Baby Dedications are done with the whole congregation there and everyone can be invited. I'm not sure if that is the case with Baptisms. I've only gone to very close family members (nephew, niece, best friend's DD, etc) and we were the only ones there.
If you are allowed to invite all to the Baptism then I would invite them to both. We only invited very close friends and family...not everyone that was invited to the shower. Since our "service" was early morning (9:30) and everyone got to our house at noon we had lunch. I've been to some that have had heavy appetizers. No one just had little snacks (chips, pretzels) and cake.
1. invite them to both and have the guest choose.
2. LUNCH! you def. need food food..not just snacks
3. just invite close family and friends
This exactly! Baptisms are more of a very close friends and close family affair. I probably wouldn't invite beyond godparents, grandparents, and my and DH's siblings.
I said on the invite ceremony time, but if you cant make it to church please celebrate with us at this time and place!
A noon celebration calls for lunch...more than just snacks!
I def would keep it only close family. Not everyone at the shower...and def not everyone at the wedding.