Need Drinking Advice

melistino · October 2010

So I just found out that I'm 5 weeks pg which is amazing. But now I'm in a bit of a sticky situation. DH and I ran away and got married a few months ago. Now our big reception is in a couple of weeks and I know my family and friends will be expecting me to drink. If this were just a random night out, I'd make up some excuse, but no one will buy the designated driver or "I just don't feel like it" excuse at our wedding party. I definitely don't want to tell people yet so I'm really stressing over how to handle this.

Any ideas????

meltoine · October 2010

Hold a drink in your hand without actually drinking it. Or, usually you and YH will have your own personal waiter, so tell him/her your situation and ask that she bring you virgins of your usual beverage.

hales.21 · October 2010

I agree with PP. Just hold a drink in your hand and pretend. If you talk to the bartenders before hand, I'm sure they could come up with a few fake drinks for you!

melistino · October 2010

Thanks, guys! I was thinking of talking to the bartender too. It would be great if I was a mixed drink person because then I could just order a virgin. My problem is I'm usually a beer drinker, and it's tough to fake a beer. I was thinking maybe ginger ale in a champagne glass. But what about when people ask if I need a drink because they're going up to the bar.

It's funny, as I type all of this, I feel like I'm way overthinking things but I know there will be peer pressure (despite the fact that I'm 35!). I thought I'd try to lay the groundwork the other day and told my friend that I didn't think I'd drink much that night because I want to be respectful and a lot of my family do not drink for personal/religious reasons. She didn't buy that for one second and gave me the "it's your day" speech. So no dice with that one!

BabyMimi · October 2010

I would speak to the bartender and tell him when you order a "cranberry vodka with lime" its really a cranberry seltzer with lime. Or how about a "gin and tonic" that is actually sprite?

mom2be:)2008 · October 2010

I think you are probably overthinking this

For starters, people are probably not going to notice whether or not you are drinking, you'll be walking around, talking to people, dancing, etc. The amount of time someone would actually notice what you were drinking is gonna be minimal. If somebody does ask, you can just say you've already had a couple and you want to be able to remember your day

I always think it's sort of funny when newly pregnant women feel like the first thing that will be noticed is whether or not they are drinking...there must be a lot of lushes out there LOL!

tlxh7 · October 2010

I would just tell people that you want to be sure you can remember the night and all the memories, and you don't want the alcohol to interfere. Or, you could say you have a slight headache and know that drinking would make it worse.

flows912 · October 2010

You're definitely overthinking it. Between greeting guests and dancing all night, you may not have that much time to drink anyway, other than the toast. For the toast, just tell them to put ginger ale instead.

iheartcutepuppies · October 2010

flows912:
You're definitely overthinking it. Between greeting guests and dancing all night, you may not have that much time to drink anyway, other than the toast. For the toast, just tell them to put ginger ale instead.

ITA! I think I maybe had 2-3 drinks during 6 hours at my wedding! You can get away with one in your hand and then not wanting any if people ask.

M&M227 · October 2010

You are over thinking. I my wedding I wasn't able to finish one drink, kept putting them down and loosing them. Have a fake and when someone asks if you want a drink say "I have one somewhere, let me find it" You'll be fine.

kewltif · October 2010

I am normally a person who drinks up when I go out, but I actually barely drank at my own wedding. I was busy running around, dancing, and talking to people. I also didn't want to be sloppy drunk at my own wedding. I was high on adrenaline and didn't feel like drinking. I bet less people would notice than you think if you weren't really drinking.

MCH77 · October 2010

I am sure that I had 8-10 drinks in my hands at my wedding and only finished 2. When someone wants to get you a beer, accept, fake sip, dance/talk/hug, put it down and "forget it." Or pass it off to DH or a friend that knows your situtation, let them take care of it.

Or get a water/soda and if someone asks, let them know you needed a break from drinking. You dont want to be drunk at your wedding

GL!!!

Angel0423 · October 2010

Um it's your wedding... so I am sure you can discreetly ask the event planner to make sure they bring you sparkling grape juice instead of champagne. Or even just sprite in a champagne flute. Other then the toasts I doubt people will even notice if you don't drink since you'll be busy dancing, cutting cake, visiting with guests, etc. At mine I didn't have time to drink anything other then the champagne that was served during my toast.

jen&jay07 · October 2010

Have you ever tried non-alcoholic beer? You could ask your reception site to have some on hand for you. Cranberry and gingerale can always be passed off as a drink. When someone asks you if you want a drink, just say that YH went to get you one then they won't insist.

But honestly, you will be so busy that no one will notice if you're drinking or not. I think during my 5 hour reception, I maybe had 1 and a half glasses of wine, Just way too busy dancing and celebrating with everyone. And when people asked if I needed a drink, I just said no thank you, I'm all set.

Congratulaton on you preganacy and wedding! Have fun!

Melissa2216 · October 2010

M&M227:
You are over thinking. I my wedding I wasn't able to finish one drink, kept putting them down and loosing them. Have a fake and when someone asks if you want a drink say "I have one somewhere, let me find it" You'll be fine.

Definitely this. I had about a half a drink the whole night, even though people kept bringing me drinks. A lot of brides are completely sober because you are talking to guests and taking pictures the whole time and there's no time to drink.

I also agree with the PP who suggested saying "my husband just went to get me a drink." Chances are, the guest will change the topic to "OMG you have a husband! How does it feel?"

melistino · October 2010

You guys are awesome! I think you're right that I'm overthinking and it's going to fly by too fast to even worry about all of this! That's a great idea about just saying my husband is getting me a drink.

The post about so many lushes was funny. It's ironic because I hardly drink but anyone who knows me knows that I need multiple drinks before I hit the dance floor, so everyone would be expecting it here. Gonna have to suck up my self-consciousness and get out there totally sober!

Thanks for calming me down!

Stellar1 · October 2010

I like to drink and all my friends know it but at my wedding I think I maybe had 2-3 drinks all night. You are seriously so busy doing stuff that drinking is the last thing on your mind. Also, your guests will probably get that you don't want to be the wasted one on your day so I wouldn't worry too much about it.

nicolen0618 · October 2010

When I first found out I was PG, DH and I had a wedding we had to go to that weekend. I wasn't past the missed period stage yet, and we JUST FOUND OUT. We did not want to tell everyone at the wedding (as it was still too soon). I too was a big beer drinker and would have been questioned if I wasn't drinking. I totally fooled everyone. I had them pour an O'Douls in a plastic glass (everyone was drinking the tap beer out of the keg that the bride and groom bought for the guests), so everyone thought that I was drinking the exact same thing. I would just quietly ask the bartender for an O'Douls and ask them if they would pour it in a plastic glass. I even had a few girls come up to me that night, pat my belly, and say, "So no baby yet, huh?" I said, "Nope. Not quite yet." Even though I knew I was PG already!! Worked like a charm!!

dbertagni · October 2010

I agree with PP we had an open bar and champagne and I think I took 2 sips of my champagne, put it down and forgot about it! You are so busy running around talking, eating, dancing, cutting the cake, etc, no one will be monitoring your consumption. One little sip of champagne at the cake cutting won't be the end of the world, or just ask for it to be sparkling cider since the glasses are usually put out with the champagne for you and DH.

skibi83 · October 2010

If your tummy even the slightest bit queezie, the NA beer might beer hard to drink, but apple juice in a glass looks just like beer. Best of luck.

sturgill · October 2010

You could just say you are on an antibiotic and don't want to relapse.

lemonlips · October 2010

I wouldn't worry too much about it. I honestly barely drank at my wedding because I was so busy having a good time dancing and eating, and who knows what else. And no one noticed! If someone offers you to get you a drink, you can even just say you are hot and would just love some ice water at the moment.

flutepharm87 · October 2010

DH and I had champagne flutes engraved for our wedding, so if you did the same thing (or even just had special glasses bought for the 2 of you), it would super easy to have the bartender use ginger ale or sparkling grape juice into your glasses for the champagne toast (there won't be any mistaking whose glass it is!). Also, purple/red grape juice could pass for red wine and white grape juice could pass for white wine. NA beer is also an option. Also consider that with the exception of dinner, it's very easy to "lose" your drink. Just have a beer next to your plate and pretend sip out of it. Usually there's a glass of ice water there as well, so just drink that when you're thirsty (people will just think you're pacing yourself so as not to get drunk, if they even notice). Once people are drunk themselves, they won't care/notice if you're not drinking anymore.

Congrats on your marriage/pregnancy! You'll be fine and you'll have the time of your life (and remember it too!).

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