Pulling out of daycare around age 2--experiences? — The Bump
Toddlers: 24 Months+

Pulling out of daycare around age 2--experiences?

We are likely pulling DD out of daycare Dec--part of March for my maternity leave. We have had an awful time with illnesses and we don't want DD exposing the new baby and going through it times 2 over the winter with a newborn. After that, we might get a nanny rather than returning to day care.

I have never loved daycare and had a lot of issues with it for much of DD's first year. Now that she's almost two, I think she kind of likes it and I actually feel bad (to my own surprise!) about pulling her out! I feel bad about the teachers that really like her, and I don't know if DD will miss her "friends," and I wonder if she will miss all the little activities. Yet, I just cannot see exposing new baby to everything during prime cold/flu season. DD was sick on/around Thanksgiving, Christmas (croup ER visit), her first b-day in Jan, family vacation in March, family vacation II, Memorial Day weekend (croup hospital overnight), etc.

DD will be 22 months or so when/if we pull her. If you've gone through this, how did your child react? Did he/she seem to miss "school?" Was it a problem? Or was it a smooth transition?

We MIGHT put both kids back into daycare in March/April, but we are really leaning towards going the nanny route for a year. These decisions are so hard.


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Re: Pulling out of daycare around age 2--experiences?

  • We're a little different but I'l share my experience...DS was 28mos when DD was born, and I work part-time and he goes to an in home daycare 20hr per week.  There are 3-4 other kids there that he was became buddies with, so I felt guilty also.  He was also fully potty trained and I didn't want to throw him off of his routine, but I kept him home with us the entire 12 week maternity leave.  DD was born in June and we honestly had a awesome summer all together, and he went back never missing a beat. He asked about the kids throughout the summer, but he had so much to do and experience with a new sibling.  Both DS and DD went back to the sitters together, and he got to "show off" his new sister and has loved it.  This is a once in a lifetime experience, and although the stress of having a toddler with a new baby, keeping routines, and friends, I wouldn't have changed it b/c when it comes down to it he would rather be with Mommy/DD/Daddy any day.

  • Personally I would think pulling her from something she seems to enjoy when the baby is born my help with illness, but it will do nothing for your sanity. It is only going to help her to have something consistent when the baby comes. Plus as you adjust, it will be a nice break to only have 1 of them. Can you drop the number of days gradually? 

    I think any big abrupt change is going to backfire. FWIW, my dd started school just after ds was born with a heart defect & down syndrome. Both of those things make it easier for him to get sick and he hasn't gotten sick at all. Remember that the baby is going to have a lot of your immunities. Maybe you could also ask the pedi about using something like airborne to boost the big one's defenses. 

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  • Sorry...this wasn't your question...but I would highly recommend keeping her in daycare at least a few days a week.  DS1 is sick all the time too thanks to daycare, but DS2 didn't catch anything but a little cold from him.  I think one of my best decisions with bringing home our second was taking big brother to daycare Monday - Thursday.  He loves playing with the kids there and he did amazing with the transition on having a baby around...I really think daycare played a big roll in that.

    It is a really hard decision.  Good luck!

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