It started to really hit me this morning...that is, all the things I might have done wrong to cause my miscarriage. I have come up with close to a dozen reasons, and feel like I am going crazy.
Deep down inside, I know, if anything, I was being overly cautious. I've had two different people tell me recently that I actually might have caused my miscarriage because I was too uptight----ugh that hurt to hear. And then my mom said it might be because my doctor prescribed me Prometrium at 6 1/2 weeks, which was right when the baby had good growth and a good heartbeat but right before things went down hill---double ugh!
Did any of you experience this feeling of blaming yourself? How do you stop?
Re: How to avoid the blame game? Help.
It's NOT your fault! There are numerous studies/articles that tell you straight out, stress (which I associate directly with being "uptight") does not cause miscarriage. Your body said "No"...but it has NOTHING to do with what you did or did not do!!!!
Call your doc...let him/her know and listen to THEM tell you it is NOT your fault. Record the conversation if you have to. Write it down...then when you start to blame yourself, remember what you were told by the doc, remember that people who tell you that YOU caused the miscarriage are JERKS and I seriously doubt your doc would've prescribed anything that could've hurt the baby...but ya know what...when you call the doc to find out it was NOT your fault, ask him/her if the Prometrium could've had anything to do with it.
(((HUGS)))
Missed m/c 10/25/10 @ 11.5 weeks
I felt (sometimes still do feel) the same way you do, but I have had numerous family members AND physicians (I work in a hospital) tell me that 97% of m/c have had no direct cause from maternal harm. Unless you were hitting the crack pipe or doing crazy stunts, you were definately not the cause of your baby's death.
In addition, im sorry you have to go thru this, ((hugs))
I'm so sorry you're having to go through this. You are not alone at all in your feelings, I've been there & still have my days. You did nothing wrong, bad things like this unfortunately just happen some times. Don't listen to anyone who tells you that you influenced it, they are horrible people for saying those things to you.
Best wishes
Even miracles take a little time - Cinderella
TTC since 5/2010
DX with Diminished Ovarian Reserve - AMH of 1.1 - 7/2011; AMH of .42 8/2012BFP 9/1/10-M/C confirmed 9/8/10-Methotrexate 10/6/10
IUI #1 (w/clomid)-9/5/11-BFN ; IUI #2 (w/clomid)-10/5/11 - BFP - 11/1/12-No sac seen; 11/2/11 and 11/9/11-Methotrexate
IVF #1- ER 2/2; ET 2/5;-Two 8 cell embryos transfered = BFFN
Surprise BFP - 5/7/12
U/S on 6/8/12 - H/B at 128 BPM; U/S on 6/14/12 @ 9wks-No H/B-D&C on 6/17/12
IVF 2.0- ER 10/17; ET 10/20-One 12 cell, one 10 cell and one 8 cell embryo transfered
BFP! 11/16/12 U/S- Two nuggets with perfect heartbeats! EDD 7/10/13
5/31/2013- My miracles arrived at 34w2d! Welcome to the world Harper and Nolan!
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