So, 20s or 30s?

nomadica · October 2010

All these posts about age have me thinking.... did you have your baby in your 20s (especially early 20s) or older (especially 30s or later), and what do you think of your choice? Wish you waited, started earlier? Think you did it just right?

I'm 32 and had my first chld 7 months ago. I'm very glad I waited. I would not have been ready 7-10 years ago, for sure. I think I would have missed out on a lot if I had gotten married and had a baby earlier. For sure, I wouldn't have been able to date a lot of wildly inappropriate but fascinating men:) I also probably would not have completed my PhD, been able to travel and live in different places throughout the country, and have been a very involved and devoted aunt, which has been a joy in my life seond only to having DS (just harder to do when you have your own kids). I also cherish the time I had to be kind of selfish and lazy, spening time focusing on my hobbies, exercising, my friends, etc., which I will never have again (maybe when I retire?).

One thing I do wonder about though- if I had my baby when I was younger, maybe I would not be so exhausted and worn out from the sleep deprivation! Physically I haven't felt great since the birth, and who knows, maybe my age has something to do with that...

You?

Starfish113 · October 2010

I had my Riley at 28 (this is my first). I think it's a good age. I was able to be selfish and enjoy my early 20s, but I still feel like I'm young enough to have the energy to chase around a little one!!

And I bet moms are sleep deprived at any age

boomersooner9779 · October 2010

Starfish113:
I had my Riley at 28 (this is my first). I think it's a good age. I was able to be selfish and enjoy my early 20s, but I still feel like I'm young enough to have the energy to chase around a little one!!

And I bet moms are sleep deprived at any age

this, except i had dd at 30.

carrotcake06 · October 2010

I had A when I was 29, almost 30. I'm very lucky - I wanted to try for a baby just when I was finishing my master's so I could stay home w him while I looked for a job after graduation - & that's exactly what I'm doing. I love this time home w him bc I know it won't last forever. I don't want it to either, I'm excited to start my new career.

I do want at least one more, but I'm waiting until I'm established in my new job for at least a yr before ttc again. So while this all is "planned" it was still incredibly stressful to have a baby, graduate (in that order, DS was early), move, have DH start a new job & be job hunting all at the same time!

Kelly1109 · October 2010

I had Lily at 31. I love being a mom so much that I wish I would have done it earlier - however, obviously it would not have been the right time as I would have been with the wrong person!

Growing up I always thought I'd have a baby by the time I was 25...funny how things actually happen!

lilbit923 · October 2010

I totally agree with this. While I had Connor when I was 24, I was very career minded and all about business when he came along. I did get to enjoy the selfish partying days and move on from it.

I see things totally differently now that I had Emma at 34 and this new baby will be in the spring. I do pay attention to the little things more now than I did when I was in my 20's. I guess because time flies by so darn fast and being a single working mom with Connor, I had to have him with my parents alot and I missed out on nearly all of his "firsts". Now? I know how precious those are and I will not miss those with Emma or the next baby. I totally regret missing Connor's first step, first tooth, first Christmas morning (my patrol schedule was crazy busy).

klf2284 · October 2010

I had Addison at 26 and I feel like this was the perfect age for me! I finished my Master's and started my career by 23 and got married at 25. My husband and I were together for 6 1/2 years before getting married, so we knew we wanted to start trying after a few months.

Couture21 · October 2010

I had DS at 22. I'm very lucky to have a baby who loves sleep, so I was never sleep deprived. Even when we came home from the hospital. He also lets me do my homework for my Master's degree. Good thing I'm not having another one, because it would probably be the opposite!

Pocky873 · October 2010

I had DD at 33 (I'm 34 now), and for the most part, I'm glad I waited. Ideally, I would've liked to have had her a couple of years earlier, but I was working full-time and going to law school at night, so at the time I thought there was no way I could swing it. I want to have at least one more kid and I feel time is ticking. That's the only reason why I wish I'd had DD slightly earlier than I did.

mrstarawalsh · October 2010

I had DS at almost 21. I'm glad I had children early. I always knew that I may have trouble having kids so when DH and I got married we didn't wait more than a year or so before TTC. After DD was born I had a complete hysterectomy so if I had waited much longer than I did I wouldn't have had children at all. I really love my life right now and I don't think I could have been more happy had I waited 10 years.

unknownuser3596 · October 2010

I had DS a few months after my 22nd birthday and DD while I was 23. It probably wouldn't have been bad had I waited but I am happy we didnt because we found out about 7 months after DS that my mom is terminally ill and I know she is thrilled to have grandkids (I have the only grandkids so far) around since we aren't sure how much longer she is going to be with us.

missjade21 · October 2010

I was 25 when I had Jade... and I think that was perfect for me. I was able to graduate from college, serve in the Air Force, get married and be married for about 2 years before getting pregnant. I wouldn't have minded having kids earlier... I've always known that I wanted to be a SAHM, but I am grateful for the time I had to myself now that I don't have that anymore.

white318 · October 2010

I am 30 now, was 29 when DS was born. I feel anytime after about 25 I was ready for children (we were going through infertility treatments starting right after we were married). I have always loved children, but am glad I did get to enjoy my 20's fully... waited to get married and then start our family. (I have two teenage stepchildren 14 and 15, so we were able to focus on them for the last 12 years and giving them everything they needed). I think I am a better parent now that I have all of the drinking, late nights, and desire to go out every night out of my system. Not that we don't enjoy going out on occasion and enjoying a drink or two (or more), but it is not my focus... my family is.

spring_time · October 2010

I had DS at 31. I would have liked to have him a little earlier, but infertility kind of got in the way of my plans. I do not regret waiting, though. I wanted to be married at least a year before we started having children, so our timing was kind of based on when we got married. I do not regret at all waiting to get married. I grew so much in my 20s, I don't think I would have been the best wife and mother at a younger age. In that time, I bought my own house, finished my Masters degree, and traveled extensively. Once married, waiting allowed us to get our financial house in order so I could SAH for at least a year.

PoseyMamma · October 2010

I had DD at 23 and I think it was the right time for me. DH and I were married for almost 3 years. I was finished with college and I had a job. I am now 24 and LO #2 is on its way. I always knew I wanted to be a mom. I had this planned that I wanted to get married young and have kids young so that I could enjoy being young and casing then around and not be overly tired. My mom had my sister and I when she was in her early 20's and then she had my other sister when she was in her mid 30's she said it was a lot different being older. So right then and there I knew I wanted to be a "young mom"

FemmeNat01 · October 2010

I had my twins at 22. I didn't want kids and I wanted to wait will 30s at the least.

I'll tell you that age has nothing to do with sleep deprivation. I was exhausted and sleep deprived for months.

DaisyFull · October 2010

I'm 32, had DD 6 months ago. VERY glad I waited. Had I married the guy I'd been with in my 20's, I'd be a single Mom right now.

Hip2Bsquare · October 2010

I am 32 and just had my first and I am VERY glad I waited too. I got to travel the world and do tons of fun things before settling down.

islandgirl79 · October 2010

ABauer55:
I'm 32, had DD 6 months ago. VERY glad I waited. Had I married the guy I'd been with in my 20's, I'd be a single Mom right now.

Totally agree!! I am so glad I waited to get married. I always thought I would have kids in my twenties but it was worth waiting.

katesmom73 · October 2010

I had my first at 31 and my second at 37. When I do the math and figure out how old I'll be when they graduate H.S. or college, it does bother me b/c it's hard to imagine myself at 55 (the age I'll be when my son graduates HS). But I also think back to my 20's and what my assumptions were about people close to 40 and they are not accurate. I thought people who were 40 were old, middle-aged, basically on the downhill slide. Now that I'm closing in on 40 and my friends are turning 40, I realize it's not that way at all so I'm assuming it will be the same when I'm in my 50's. Plus, in my area, most people don't have kids until their 30's so I'll be surrounded by a bunch of other "old" people.

ivys2cute · October 2010

I had my first daughter at 22 and my second at 32....yea i know 10 yrs apart!

Timeg · October 2010

Had my first at 26 and I think that was a great age to start. I was young enough to handle the all-nighters, etc., but had experienced enough that I didn't feel like I was missing out on things. I don't regret anything.

mojito14 · October 2010

I had my first when I was 30 exactly. I'm fine with not having kids till then. DH and traveled a ton before kids (and we are still traveling - just not as much). I would have been ready earlier too, but it all worked out exactly as it should have.

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