How long to TTC again??!!

PenguinHill · October 2010

Husband and I went for repeat u/s today to confirm our 8 wk pregnancy isn't viable. Unfortunately, there was no change, and we scheduled our D&C for Thursday.

Adding to our sense of loss and frustration, today our Ob recommended waiting for the period after the miscarriage (which is almost invariably from hormone withdrawal after the pregnancy rather than a normal/ovulatory cycle), then ANOTHER TWO OR THREE cycles before we start trying again. Come on! That's 3 or 4 months! I thought we'd be most of the way through our pregnancy by then..... sigh...

DH and I are so ready for this, I don't think we can wait 3 months to start trying. What have your Obs recommended, and do you honestly think you could wait 3-4 months to even start trying if your Ob told you to??

purplechic7105 · October 2010

YUCK, NO WAY!!! But, I am not an OB. Sooo I would suggest pushing your OB for why you need to wait so long just to be sure it's for a physical and not an emotional reason.

Mine said 2 cycles but I said, "when can we start trying again, after I get my first period right?" and he said "yeah". Ha ha slight nudge! Needless to say as soon as AF arrives we'll be TTC again as we too were super excited and ready to be parents.

That is quite frustrating news and I'm very sorry for your loss.

JanaRoller · October 2010

I'm sorry for your loss. I just had laparoscopic surgery to remove my left tube and ectopic pregnancy four days ago. I thought I had a m/c in August but turns out it was a tubal pregnancy the whole time and because the other side of my uterus was telling my body it was go time (i had a period and ovulated while the tubal pregnancy was happening) I thought why not try again? I thought for sure I was pregnant again but nope, it was the same one from August which caused some major confusion for the doctors. So I would say wait because you never know what could be going on. Plus you want your body to be as baby ready as possible. Although your head may be saying go for it your body may not be ready yet. I'm waiting for quite a while so that I can loose more weight and be as healthy as I can to reduce my risk of loosing another baby. Good luck to you! I know it's a hard time but your body will tell you when the right time to try again is. Much love!

Marcilyn0812 · October 2010

I'm sorry for you loss we lost ours at 8 weeks on 10/11. My midwife said physically as soon as AF returns, emotionally...a couple months if you need it. I told her no thanks...we wantred a sibling ASAP. She said okay and stressed to me not to stop taking my prenatals.

divaem · October 2010

Mine said one cycle...I am not sure people seem to get different answers. This was my first pregnancy and so maybe he assumes that my body has gone through not as much as someone who has had other pregnancies (cervix dilations etc), which I am not sure if that is you,...likely it is your first too?! Or if you have other health concerns??

I dunno...just trynna figure it out. I am not sure if anything I said was offensive, if so, I definately didnt mean it that way at all...

Could you ask why and get a clearer answer??

camedowncrushing · October 2010

I am so sorry for your loss.

My OB said to wait one cycle. I typically have 65ish day cycles, and I only ovulated twice in the last year so we are basically going to get right back to trying as soon as we can.

cherylanddoug · October 2010

My doctor said to wait 2 cycles. We are now at the point we can try again. It did seem like a long time but your body needs time to heal and rebuild the lining of your uterus.

I would highly advise listening to your doctor. If you want to try sooner at least call and ask the doctor to explain his opinion. I think what sealed it for me was knowing how incredibly guilty I would feel if I did not follow doctor's orders and ended up with another miscarriage. I will do anything to prevent losing another child.

kelseymw · October 2010

I am sorry for your loss. This question gets asked almost daily on this board and the simple answer is that we're all told different things. All of our pregnancies were different, the circumstances of our losses were different, our bodies are different and our doctors are different. If you do not want to wait that long, I would probe your OB for answers as to why he/she advises that and express your concerns. Hopefully you get the answers you are looking for and GL!

haziedaze · October 2010

I'm so sorry for your loss and totally sympathize with your feeling of being so ready to be parents. I would push your doctor about their reasoning behind the advice. I pushed mine and they said while there isn't any good data they recommend waiting for healing reasons and to help date the next pregnancy. In the end, it is clearly your choice, but I would get more info from your doctor about your situation so you can make an informed choice.

jenniann87 · October 2010

Im so sorry for your loss.

My OB/GYN told me that we can start TTC again as soon as I got my first AF. I am not a Dr so I would suggest asking your OB why he wants you to wait that amount of time. Everyone is different and there might be a reason as to why you were given this time frame.

FmrAFBrat · October 2010

I was told that I could TTC as soon as my levels hit 0. I will try after AF since my brother & SIL just had a baby and are trying for an irish twin. They started to TTC when we did & they had their LO on Oct 16th. I am really devistated & will do anything to get pregnant again sooner than later.

PenguinHill · October 2010

I really appreciate all the responses and condolences. I know this gets asked often; my main question was if anyone else had heard this long of a timeframe (I saw a lot of people being advised 1-2 cycles) or thought they'd be able to adhere to it.

A few people said to ask my Ob, and don't worry, I will certainly do that for further clarification on why the long wait. I think DH and I just received so much information in the last week that questions only come up after I leave the office.... I was just wondering what others have heard. Although I trust my Ob's opinion, I feel a lot of it is just that... an opinion. As a very healthy woman who had an uncomplicated intrauterine pregnancy loss, it's just hard to wrap my brain around someone tell me to wait 3-4 montsh when other people get the immediate go-ahead, and I would also say it may be easier to say "do what your doctor says" when yours is telling you to just wait 1 cycle. It's just tough, we're so ready and have been planning for a very long time. Thanks again for the responses.

good2bewood · October 2010

Hey!

We just miscarried too this past Friday and we can't wait to try again! I haven't talked to my Dr. about trying again but I have heard of several women who have miscarried, tried again the following month, conceived, and went on to have healthy cute little munkins! There is no solid evidence proving that you MUST wait. The doctors that say 3-4 months (to healthy women who do not have a history of multiple miscarriages) tend to say this for emotional stability, not physical necessity. Usually the standard response from doctors is one full cycle but I am not sure about why that is. Still I am, not a doctor and as previously stated, it's good to ask your doctor for clarification.

beachbum28 · October 2010

so sorry for your loss....my ob told me to try and wait till I after my af...but that if it happen before than that it was not a big deal....but i think every dr is different.

stacee55j · October 2010

My doctor is also stongly recommending we wait 3 cycles. I didn't understand it either since so many couple we know that have also experienced miscarriage were told to wait just 1...one of the couple's doctor even told them that they're more fertile following a miscarriage! I don't know if there is truth to that but we'll probably hold out our 3 cycles (even though I SO badly want to start trying again - it took us 6 months the first time around) because she said while it probably won't be an issue and the odds are on our side, the sooner we start the more likely we will be to miscarry again since everything needs to build back strength etc. GL making your decision!

Corts · October 2010

HI,

I just went yesterday for my 1 week post-MC visit. The OB was very nice and said, as soon as your period returns, it is ok to try again. She said a lot of the waiting 2-3 cycles is only so the couple can track their periods/ovulations to pinpoint conception time. If you use the ovulation tests, it's no needed to wait. I am not waiting 3 months. I am anxiously awaiting AF and just ordered a 3 month supply of fertilaid for my husband. I loved being pregnant and can't wait to be again. Hopefully the next one will have a happy ending. I am trying to think positive

mellymel12 · October 2010

My Dr. told me we could TTC as soon as AF comes...which (I pray!) will be in another 2 to 3 weeks. She said there was no reason why we had to really wait. I don't know if they base it on what "kind" of miscarriage you have or how far along you were...but I totally feel your frustration.It seems like everyone get's different 'waiting' times.

I already had my panties in a bunch over the thought of having to wait 2 or 3 cycles...and I hadn't even talked to my Dr. yet!

Hang in there! I hope everything works out for you!

vegasgirl07 · October 2010

My OB suggested 6 months, but if we were in a rush, 3 cycles after I get my period. I'm 5 weeks post d&c and still waiting for AF.

I will say at first I wanted to try right away, but now i think im too emotinoally scarred and just not ready to try again.

Good luck i hope your AF comes quick!

x0stephanie · October 2010

I asked my midwife and my OB and neither had super concrete opinions, they both ranged from waiting until my first normal period to 2 weeks later (aka right away). My miscarriage happened at 5w4d and i m/c'd naturally, so I think it might be different if you needed a d&c - time to regrow your uterine lining so your egg can implant properly. We are going to wait until my first period which i hope will happen in the next 2 weeks before we ttc again. The reason for this is because i would go crazy not having an accurate due date. I want to know the exact date of AF and ovulation and not have to go by dating ultrasounds.

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