DD mauled by another kid at DC y'day

Re: DD mauled by another kid at DC y'day

• Taytee

  October 2010

  Abby was "the biter" at her daycare during those years. So far as I know, she has never ever been bitten.

  Having worked in daycares for many years, I can honestly say that it's possible an incident happened and the only thing they saw was an upset baby that they comforted. I wouldn't think to strip a child down and start looking for bite marks because they're crying or even screaming bloody murder. Even as watchful parents, kids fall and bonk their heads, pinch tiny fingers when we're not looking etc.

  But since they know there is a biter, I'm sure they are already keeping a watchful eye. Bites can and do still happen. Emily is already "a biter" and has gotten Abby pretty good twice =(

  Overall, It's one of those things that hurts our hearts as parents, but really isn't doing all that much damage (physically or emotionally) to our children. Unless you feel the bites are occuring out of downright neglectful watching on the part of your caregivers, try to take a few steps back from the situation and understand your child will probably be fine.

  And one day, you may be the parent feeling like crap on the other end of that incident report!

  ETA: I first read the post as "3-4 bites" as in, like individual tooth impressions? I didn't realize it was 4 actual individual BITES. That definitely is hard to believe it went unnoticed for that long or that many times!

  

  Report0 Reply
• Loading the player...
• rssnlvr

  October 2010

  MrsRosie:

  Each time he was bitten, an "ouch report" was created for me to sign.  In your situation, I would be majorly pissed that they didn't notice that calibur of biting happening in order to notify you at pick-up.  The non-reporting would bother me more than the bites themselves.

  This exactly. Ali's been bitten a couple of times. Each time an incident report was written out for me, I got a phone call, etc. The thing that would upset me the most was that there was that LEVEL of biting going on and no one noticed.
  

  Dear Bump: You suck.

  Report0 Reply
• LS0909

  October 2010

  Unfortunately I've experienced both sides of biting.  My DD has been bitten twice and was the biter a couple weeks ago.  All three times I was told of the biting incident when I picked DD up from school and I had to sign an incident report.  I would be LIVID if I found bite marks on my child and the school hadn't notified me that something happened. 

  Report0 Reply
• bobcatsteph member

  October 2010

  rssnlvr:

  MrsRosie:

  Each time he was bitten, an "ouch report" was created for me to sign.  In your situation, I would be majorly pissed that they didn't notice that calibur of biting happening in order to notify you at pick-up.  The non-reporting would bother me more than the bites themselves.

  This exactly. Ali's been bitten a couple of times. Each time an incident report was written out for me, I got a phone call, etc. The thing that would upset me the most was that there was that LEVEL of biting going on and no one noticed.
  

  
  
  This.
  
  DD has actually been bitten three times in the past two weeks and they've given us an incident report and iced the area each time. Honestly, if they wouldn't have done the report, we wouldn't have known because she didn't even have any marks on her.
  
  I talked to the director and they've talked to both parents (two different kids are doing the biting). They are also working on "no biting" lessons and bought a book about biting to read to the kids.
  
  I would definitely talk to the director..and I would be pissed that there wasn't a report of the incident!
  

  
  

  

  

  
  
  The Blog

  Report0 Reply
• Nessia

  October 2010

  DS has been the biter and I've always been told about it. Thankfully he's outgrown it. The thing is he was never able to get more than one bite in before he was reprimanded. How could a child get 2 or 3 bites in and no one notice? Did these all happen in one day or maybe it's happened every day and you just noticed?  I would be upset about it too. I would be pissed I wasn't told. It would make me question if anything else has happened and they didn't tell me. Anytime DS has fallen or hit his head I'm either called or told at the end of the day. I hope you took pictures so you could show them how bad it was.
  

  Report0 Reply
• MrsShackleford member

  October 2010

  Nessia:

  DS has been the biter and I've always been told about it. Thankfully he's outgrown it. The thing is he was never able to get more than one bite in before he was reprimanded. How could a child get 2 or 3 bites in and no one notice? Did these all happen in one day or maybe it's happened every day and you just noticed?  I would be upset about it too. I would be pissed I wasn't told. It would make me question if anything else has happened and they didn't tell me. Anytime DS has fallen or hit his head I'm either called or told at the end of the day. I hope you took pictures so you could show them how bad it was.
  

  DD did not have any marks before school y'day.  We would def notice.

  We did take pics.  DH showed the director and lead the pics this morning.  DH said they were genuinely concerned.

  They apologized and admitted that there is a biting problem in the room.  Said they had a bad day y'day and said they are trying to address it. 

  They offered to move her into the next room, but she would be the smallest kid in the next room, so we are not sure if that is the best for us.

  Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

  Report0 Reply
• katattack

  October 2010

  DD was bitten probably 6-7 times in a few month stretch at her old school. I was so distraught over the whole thing, because whether or not anyone believes it, it does impact a child.  She would say no bite, no bite, over and over again for days and was very sad when she said it; she also started having nightmares right around the same time.  I don't find that acceptable, even though I do know it's 'normal' for kids to bite and I'm sure the biter's parents feel horrible about it as well.  One of the times, we weren't told, and there was no way they couldn't have seen it. She had on short sleeves and it was very clearly on her forearm with broken skin.  I was livid that time.

  That being said, DD has never been a biter (knock on wood), so I don't think that being bitten turns a kid into a biter.

   

   

   
  

  

  Report0 Reply
• MrsRegis

  October 2010

  This! There is something primitive about biting that flips us out as parents. We almost never react the same way to hitting, which is really no different in it's physical and emotional impact.  I would be concerned that you were not notified. That speaks to the incapabilities of the daycare provider. It sounds to me like they need more manpower. 

  Report0 Reply
• JezcaM

  October 2010

  MrsRosie:

  Each time he was bitten, an "ouch report" was created for me to sign.  In your situation, I would be majorly pissed that they didn't notice that calibur of biting happening in order to notify you at pick-up.  The non-reporting would bother me more than the bites themselves.

  this exactly.

  aubrey was bitten twice (three times, really) last year, each time she received an ouch report and one of the teachers pulled me aside to tell me about the occurrences.  she was not bitten more than once per incident, as the teachers immediately intervened.  the second time the (same) kid bit her, we moved her to another class.

  additionally, the director emailed me to let me know they had a conference with the biter's mom and were working with her on some techniques to try at home to mirror the teachers' efforts to teach her child not to bite. both of the times the kid bit her, the kid was playing - not attacking. what do you mean that the bites look "angry?" just curious - doesn't really matter.
  

  of course, about two weeks into the new class, another kid bit her! those teachers handled it the same way, and i'm glad to say she wasn't bitten again. seemed she was a bite-magnet last year.
  

  
  

  Report0 Reply
• MrsAJL member

  October 2010

  I'm surprised you weren't told about this when you picked up your child at day care.  At DS' preschool, it is policy to notify the parents of a biting or hitting accident and then to right up a report (usually a standard form that is kept on file and copies given to the parents of both children involved.)

  Biting, while painful and upsetting, is a form of communication that little ones will sometimes go through, so it is normal (though not a fun thing.)  

  I would talk to the director and as what their policy on biting is and why you (or whoever picks up your child) wasn't notified that day.  I would be most bothered about discovering something like that on my own without any notice.
  

  Report0 Reply
• Nessia

  October 2010

  It's good that the staff appeared concerned. I would  just make sure to address the non-notification and multiple bites.
  

  Report0 Reply