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Secondary IF
New, long introduction
Hi,
I'm not sure really what board I need to hang out on right now, and I don't want to upset any TTTCers by having a 22 month old in my siggy, so I'm starting here.
I live in Denver,work at home part of the time, but I'm employed up in Boulder so I'm up there a few times a week.
It took us 8 months of trying, 6 of charting, to conceive DS. Sometimes we think he was a miracle of sorts because DH had just gotten terrible SA news, and my clomid challenge tests were borderline depressing, and we were planning and IUI, but because of vacation timing had to wait a month, and our RE joked as we left the appointment, "go get pregnant in Belize and you won't need me!" And we did, and our son is the light our our lives.
We *really* want to give him a sibling. I'm 40 and DH is 41, our birthdays are both near DS's birthday in early December, so we don't have time to really fool around, as it were. Also, FWIW, my mom is an only child, not for lack of trying re my gramma. And my sister is adopted, my parents also were unable to get pg again after me and mom went through menopause in her early 40s (and we were in St. Louis, my mom's OB was Dr. Masters of Masters and Johnson).
I could argue we've tried for 3 months, but the first month we weren't really trying, but since I tested, I have the memory of a BFN in my head for 3 cycles
We're using a fertility monitor and I'm charting. Temps always, and CF and CP as much as I can remember.
This month was full of unfortunate timing, as DH had a conference right in the middle of my cycle. Worse than that, though, I seem to be having an anovulatory cycle. The first of which I've ever been aware. I was ridiculously stressed earlier this month with a huge work deadline and at the same time we were having to pack our offices because we were moving into a new building on campus. I was getting 4 hours of sleep a night when I was lucky, and working up to 16 hours a day. I'm hoping that's all it was to cause no ovulation.
Oddly enough (at least to me with only 3 months of using the CBEFM under my belt), I've gotten "high" readings for 8 days. But maybe you guys have experience to know if having to change to a new box of sticks could have caused that...I know the instructions say to stick with one box for a cycle, but I figured I'd O by the time I used my last 6 sticks and also that it was just a way for them to make more money on people buying more sticks. So maybe I never even really got a high reading, much less no peak reading. On the other hand, the first month we used the monitor, I did have 7 high readings before a peak.
Anyway, DH isn't ready to give in and see the RE yet, but I'm a little panicked and feel like I need to get our ducks in a row. I'm thinking of trying acupuncture, and at least calling to get on the RE's schedule if it takes a couple of months. Plus, the IUI we originally planned was in part because of the plethora of diagnostics that come along with it.
I'm getting really stressed about this, I feel like I'm losing my mind. In part, I'm freaking because of our ages. I'm also aware that a lot of this may very well be hormonal, because I feel so absolutely not pregnant at all, I feel empty inside, so there's just so zero of a chance that I can be pg, I don't even have POAS to look forward to, and no idea when this cycle will end.
For anyone who got this far in my ridiculously long post, do you have any experiences you can share with anovulatory cycles? or with getting a jillion high readings with no peaks on a CBEFM (or was it just the change in sticks)? Any advice at all? I'm feeling very alone and sad about this today. I realize it sounds ridiculous because it's only been a couple of cycles, but the anov cycle freaks me out in conjunction with family history, and in my gut I just feel like something isn't "right."
Thanks so much for listening 
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Re: New, long introduction
Mom to Teagan 4.11.07 and Cora 9.30.11
D&E @ 22w 9.30.09 CMV infection BFP 10.15.10 C/P 4w4d
Thanks so much, you guys. I'm a hot mess of emotions today and hate to have to reach out for support from internet "strangers," but none of my "home" boards seem like the place to go right now.
I wonder if the ridiculous emotional roller coaster that is my life today at least means something's happening hormonally, either to O super late or to end this cycle without an O.
Thanks again.
I'm sorry you're feeling alone and sad today--I think we've all been there and it stinks. I'm also an AMA mommy, and I just wanted to put in a plug for acupuncture. I had two m/c's before DS, and I really think acupuncture helped get my hormones--messed up from the m/c's and perhaps my age--straightened out. My acupuncturist actually said that acupuncture is commonly used in Asia before attempting to conceive--she called it "tilling the soil." I definitely think acupuncture, in conjunction with identifying and resolving some of my underlying medical issues, helped me conceive DS. Good luck to you.
After my last miscarriage, I only tried for 2 cycles and then freaked out and made an appt. with an RE. I was just done with all the stress that TTC brings, and was feeling exactly as you describe.
I agree with all the previous posters. Its a totally personal decision, but if you feel like something just isnt right then seeing an RE might make you feel better. Having a plan, and hence some control, really helped me.
Ditto this! I'd rather get a plan in action and hop to it! Welcome to the board and lots of luck to you!
"Just keep swimming, just keep swimming..."
Welcome - sounds like you're in the right place!
IMHO, given your family history and your ages, your DH needs a bit of a fire under him, and the two of you should go to an RE asap. I say that as someone who is very much in favor of acupuncture. If it were up to me, I'd suggest starting acupuncture AND calling the RE asap - it's my belief that acupuncture works well on its own, but can also provide a profound improvement in AR treatment. At the very least, it will help you measurably reduce stress in all areas.
I wish you the best and hope you get your BFP soon!
"Just keep swimming, just keep swimming..."
Miracle DD born 12.2005
TTC #2 since Dec 2008 w/ PCOS
***P/SAIF Always Welcome***
Keep it Natural, Baby!
Hi!!! First of all, I will say that this board is a great source of support. I never said anything on our local board about trying while we were trying and then on to the RE, etc.
Secondly, I think it's completely normal to have an anovulatory cycle every now and then, especially with everything you have had going on. I don't have any experience with the CBEFM, so I'm no help there with the high readings.
Lastly, I agree with the others and think that you should see an RE. If your DH isn't on board with getting some help, that's okay. At least they could tell you where you stand today (any issues, chances on your own, etc) and give you options for moving forward when you and your DH is ready. I don't know who you saw before, but I know Dr. Swanson has an office up in Louisville and I saw him at the Littleton office. He's become the RE of the CO Nesties
It did take a couple of months to get in for our first appt and then we had a cycle of testing (CD3 bloodwork, SA, u/s, hsg, etc). So you are looking at least 2-3 months before you really have any answers.
Lots and lots of luck to you and if you ever want to talk or vent - you know where to find me
Thanks so much, you guys, I really appreciate the lift
.
I think the issue is that on some level even though he'd never say it, DH may indeed think DS has a gold star sticker on him for having shown up during the "off" month between clomid and and IUI+diagnostics.
After I posted earlier, I talked with my midwife who gave me the contact info for the acupuncturists they work with most, and I'm going to call them tomorrow to try to get in. Meanwhile, I think I'll go ahead and make contact again with the RE's office, I have no idea if we'll have any sort of priority to get in since we consulted with them last time. Even though we got pg without their intervention, they were still awesome about considering me "their" patient, so when my OB's office (I now see the associated midwives) laughed at my request for betas or an early ultrasound, the RE took care of it all until they were sure all was well, I think the whole first tri.
Thanks! It's funny, the RE I saw is in those same offices, but it's Dr. Bush. Not so much on the bedside manner (I don't think he ever actually introduced himself and he didn't say goodbye at the end of our first visit, leaving us to wonder if he was coming back), but I was good with his very scientific orientation. I think maybe Nic or someone else went to him? Dr. B was all about doing an IUI right away during that first cycle for testing. Anyway, if I can't get in to Dr. B, I'll definitely ask for Dr. S.
Can they do the HSG on site? I was doing it piecemeal through referrals from my OB before I went to the RE (not on my insurance last time), and they had to sent me to CU Hospital (long drive and really rude practitioner). I work nearer to the Lafayette branch, but I live a bit closer to Littleton. Thanks!!