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December 2010 Moms
Lame excuses for people not going to your shower?
My shower is today, and I have had people come up with lots of reason why they can't make it. I understand if your child is sick or you have people coming in from out of town. The lamest excuse that I've gotten from at least 25 people is "I'm not going because the Saints game is on at that time." So apparently football is extremely important. What upsets me about it more is that some of the people telling me that are some of the people that I go above and beyond for all the time. I guess that's going to stop because obviously they can't give up one game. It just really upsets me, and I had to vent. I've been hearing that excuse all week, and I'm just aggravated. Also, most of DH's family won't come. They expect us to be at every event they have and get upset if we're not there, but they never bother to show up to anything for either one of us.
So, what's the lamest excuse you've been given?
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Re: Lame excuses for people not going to your shower?
I'm so glad you brought this up - I've been dying to complain about my "best friends"!!
Maybe two weeks before my shower, one of my closest friends (who I have been considering for LO's godmother) told me that she couldn't make it because she had to work. She seemed genuinely upset that she couldn't make it and I totally understood. The night after the shower, I called her at about 9pm, and she said she was working until midnight. Her shift was 8pm to midnight... my shower was at 11am. She lives half an hour away. I'm quite unimpressed.
That was the big one. There are a few others who I knew just didn't feel like it and were making up excuses. You're not alone, and it sucks when people you think would really caer to be there have something "better" to do with their time than to celebrate this little life. Gr.
I am so sorry that you have people who are telling you that they can't come b/c of a football game! Football is extremely important in my house, but not more important than other people and relationships! Wow!
My BIL didn't come to our co-ed shower because "he didn't feel welcome" after my MIL scolded him that morning. Keep in mind my MIL is very mild mannered and didn't yell, and my BIL is 27 with 4 kids... definitely an adult. We also had one person who didn't want to come to the shower and said she had to work- she invited us over to her house later that night and we find out that she didn't work- she got a tattoo done instead!
Did these people spend alot of money on tickets to the game or are they planning on staying home and watching it on tv? If door #2 all I can say is WOW!
Ugh -- me too! I've got a friend who just posted a Facebook message to say she can't come to my shower today, not even the decency to ring my mum and let her know. This is my supposed "best friend" too.
Pregnancy seems to bring out who the *real* friends are, doesn't it?
Most definitely. But not only negatively; a lot of people start to surprise you with how much they care, when you wouldn't expect it from them!
Mine is from a lady who used to be a really good friend, but we've grown apart in the last few years. She moved to a different state to marry a guy she barely knew who she met on the internet. She was very distant during her marriage because she was unhappy. She's back in Texas, living not too far from me (we live on opposite outskirts of Austin), and after a long, drawn out divorce process, her divorce is final. We've hung out some, but she hasn't made a lot of effort.
When I first found I was pregnant, she said she wanted to throw me a shower or she wanted to at least be included in it. A couple of other friends that DH and I hang out with all the time had already offered, so I asked that they contact my friend about it. Well, she completely flaked, saying she couldn't help financially (she has a good job). We all thought that was fine, but we thought she could still be involved in planning and prepping. She ended up not even attending my shower because she works on Saturdays. Ummmm... so does the main hostess, but she made sure she was off that day.
They stay home and watch it on TV. All I wanted was one afternoon to spend with family and friends. I don't care if they have a gift or not. Most of them have a phone that they can get updates on during the game anyway. It's just frustrating.
And let's be honest...the Saints are playing the Browns. It is going to be a ridiculous game. We (Cleveland) are set to lose by at least 2 touchdowns I think.
The only person who is not coming to my shower is DH's best friend's girlfriend. And I know it is because she just wants to watch the Browns game because I know she is tailgating right now. Her boyfriend's mom is coming as well as some of the other wives of that group of friends, so she would have known people. It will be the LAST time I invite her to ANYTHING.
Is it bad that I am almost judging them more for rooting for USC?
SEC football. All the way. No contest. And even then, DVR the damn game!
My MIL didn't go to either my bridal or baby shower because she's Vietnamese and "her people don't do showers". Direct quote.
Except she went to both bridal and baby shower for my husbands cousin. Hmmmmm....
My shower is tomorrow ... and I am highly upset about it. More than 100 invites .... and we have five, yes, *FIVE* confirmed guests! WTH?! We even scheduled it for a Monday night instead of on the weekend so that my DH's co-workers would be able to attend ... and none of them are coming. Ditto for my church choir members (about 25 of whom said they were wanting to come, originally).
Don't get me wrong. I am happy to celebrate with those who will be attending, but I can't help but be disappointed. This is our first (and probably only) child. At 35, I've been waiting forever for the blessed gift. It just hurts to feel as if my "friends" don't care.
That is my vent.
Our beautiful baby boy!!!
Trust in the Invisible ... and expect the INCREDIBLE!!!
Seeing how Cleveland is up right now...maybe they should have gone to the shower!
Sadly my shower was scheduled on the day it was b/c LSU was playing McNeese at 6pm. Lord knows it couldn't have been on LSU/AL weekend :0)
I second this sentiment. It's a very boring game. I would have had more fun at a baby shower and getting updates via text from friends.
That is total BS. Who rsvp's "no, thanks I'd rather sit at home & watch TV" next event they host I would totally reply 'no thanks I have to stay home and wash my hair"
Out of 52 people invited, we had 50 respond yes. One girl lived far away, so I thought she might not come, and the other woman has a sick husband, so we knew that one too.
But, the day of the shower, 2 other people didn't come: this one friend from high school who called my best friend (not my mom, the hostess) 10 pm the night before to say she wasn't going and asked "do you think that's ok?". My best friend, God love her, said, "Actually no, I don't think that's all right. I'm surprised you do."
And then one of my mom's friends sent a message through another person that she's sick. I mean, sure you're sick, that's totally valid, but jeez, have the balls to call my mom!
My aunt, who ironically, was the one who took my mom to the hospital when she was giving birth to me, called to tell me that she wasnt coming because " she has a committment at her church". Her services are on Sundays and the shower is on a Saturday....
But I shrugged if off and told her it was ok, even though it really wasnt. I'm still holding a grudge against her for not coming to my wedding. It was a destination wedding, but she and her husband were actually already on the island vacationing and just decided not to come. Everyone in my family asked why I even bothered to have her on the shower guest list...wishful thinking I guess...
Yes This! I had a lot of people that couldn't attend ( the shower was canadian thanksgiving weekend b/c it was the only weekend I could make it back to my home town) which I understood. But my best friend, really showed how great of a friend she was she invited tons of people and was really apologetic that it ended up small. she not only planned the shower with fun games and nice prizes which she also bought, she also made me a diaper cake, bought me a gift, bought decorations, and these fun lollipop washclothe things off the net, made some of the food ( another friend helped) all in the same weekend as she planned her daughters 1st birthday. She's an angel, my mom also travelled 5.5 hours to attend. The people that didn't come were quickly forgotten about when I realized how lucky I was to have a few amazing people in my life!
Also OP, ya, the football game on TV is a brutal excuse, screw em' . Send a thank you note " thanks for not coming, we really appreciate how much our new child will clearly mean to you."
25 people didn't go to your shower because of football? Holy crap - how many people were invited to your shower?
The only thing I'm really annoyed about now is that some people haven't RSVP'd yet and it's past the date and the hostess is wondering what's going on. So, the lamest excuse is no excuse.
As for lame excuses, our shower is on Halloween and some people are like, "I have Halloween partying to do." Not a specific party, just getting drunk in general, even though they're also doing that on Saturday. I think that's sort of lame, but I also understand because we ended up choosing a holiday, so that's on us.
The only other one that bothers me is my best friend. It's actually a pretty good excuse, but I guess I'm just sad she can't make it. She's turning 30 that Friday, and she's doing this weekend-long celebration of it. What's annoying is that we also invited her mom and Grandmother, and now all of those people are also implicated in the birthday stuff and not going to the shower. I had hoped that a Friday birthday would mean she might be free Sunday night, but I guess not. :-( It was basically out of her hands, though, because it was her boyfriend and mom planning all of the stuff. My mom is annoyed because she feels like my friend's mom is obligated to come but I realize it's partially our fault for choosing that weekend in the first place. It was the only date that worked with the hostess, myself, and my mom, though. Oh well!
Ugh, I'd be so annoyed if people used a football game as an excuse. One of my cousins skipped my wedding because of a football game!
I didn't get any lame excuses, but I am upset because another cousin, who I'm pretty close to, isn't coming and never gave an explanation to the hostesses. She didn't even bother to tell me she can't make it.