Can you love your second child as much as the first?

bobbydsgirl · October 2010

Hello, I am new here.

I only have one child and this is a serious question. I can't really imagine how it's possible.

I can only imagine another one adding to the stress... Embarrassed

Thoughts from mothers of more than one?

kimthgrt · October 2010

oh my yes.

Mrs.Hizzo · October 2010

Everyone thinks that when they only have one, but yes, you love the second one just as much.

AfterAll · October 2010

No it is not possible.

Of course it is! Your heart grows in ways you can't imagine, the same way it did with your first child.

jason&robin · October 2010

Most definitely YES...as I snuggle #2 right now!

Shayna0182 · October 2010

I hope so, lol I am the youngest of two!

Seriously, I never thought I would ever love another child the way I do with ds, but I think the love you have expands with each pregnancy.

erinjcianciolo · October 2010

absolutely possible!

LoveEeyore · October 2010

Another one adds to the stress, the chaos, the sleeplessness. The tension in your marriage. Another one adds to the worry of paying for braces, and college and weddings. Another one changes everything.

Throughout my twin pregnancy I cried a great deal about not having enough love for them, about "taking love" from my very beloved first. But you love the next one even more because you actually know what love is. Not more than you love your first, but more than you knew you could love before your first. You love and love b/c you must. Because you can't help it.

The first is sweet and special and is the one that changed your status in the world to mom. But yes, you love your second as much as you are capable of love.

Jules G · October 2010

Welcome

I only have 1 LO, but I don't worry one bit about loving a 2nd, 3rd, 4th, etc. child just as much as I love DD. My cheesy thought about it is that the love you have for your 1st LO is multiplied, not divided between LO's. That being said, I have no doubt the stress is multiplied as well, but the stress that comes with having DD is totally worth it & any added stress from additional LO's would be totally worth it too!

leslie13510 · October 2010

Having not ever experienced only having one kid, I can only say that it is very possible to love two kids with the same intensity. My heart literally feels like it's going to break some days from all the love I feel for them.

cjswife2007 · October 2010

I was terrified of this too. But without question, you'll love #2 just as much. DS is now 4 months old, and one morning, my husband saw me snuggling DS after I had nursed him around 5am and DH said "and you were worried you wouldn't love him as much as you love (DD)." I just had to laugh bc as big of a fear as it was for me, it is funny to think that way now. Your heart just grows!!

NOVAMommy5 · October 2010

Oh my goodness, can you ever. It's unreal.

How to explain it without sounding super sappy? I love my girl to itty bitty little pieces. She's my favorite girl in the whole world. But my boy? He's got me so wrapped around his finger, it's ridiculous. So, yes, you definitely can. You'll love them for different reasons, but just as much.

kada626 · October 2010

Of course!!! Two is even better.

macchiatto · October 2010

Yes. You're not the only person who has asked this, but as a twin mom I have a hard time understanding what prompts this question.

janjag · October 2010

LoveEeyore:

Another one adds to the stress, the chaos, the sleeplessness. The tension in your marriage. Another one adds to the worry of paying for braces, and college and weddings. Another one changes everything.

Throughout my twin pregnancy I cried a great deal about not having enough love for them, about "taking love" from my very beloved first. But you love the next one even more because you actually know what love is. Not more than you love your first, but more than you knew you could love before your first. You love and love b/c you must. Because you can't help it.

The first is sweet and special and is the one that changed your status in the world to mom. But yes, you love your second as much as you are capable of love.

Sweet. Very nice, and honest way to put it.

hellopoppyseed · October 2010

Oh I really had these same questions. I could not believe I could love another like ds1 but wow I really do. Ds2 is so wonderful and precious. I can't believe it but it is really possible.

Ivana_Stolichnaya · October 2010

I think it's a valid question because I love my baby girl to no end and it's hard to think that there will eventually be someone else out there who will be capable of stealing my heart all over again. I can't wait to have another who I can share that love with, we just need to wait a little longer.

outnumbered · October 2010

Nope, I only love my oldest. I had the other two to do the chores when they are big enough.

kate081206 · October 2010

Yes. It was hard to imagine how I would love another LO more than my DS. But when my DD was born, it was so amazing and I love her so much too. Two just makes it sweeter : )

jenerally? · October 2010

Your first will always hold a special place in your heart. Nothing is going to change that. But you'll love your second (and ++) as well, in a special way that you don't love your first.

You'll love them because of, and in spite of, their differences. You'll love them because s/he is yours.

jbl126 · October 2010

macchiatto:
Yes. You're not the only person who has asked this, but as a twin mom I have a hard time understanding what prompts this question.

I cannot agree more. But then again I am in the same boat as you and only know how to love two. You just do, end of story.

Want a personalized experience?

Can you love your second child as much as the first?

Re: Can you love your second child as much as the first?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards