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Bedtime for a 3 Month Old
This is a similar question to the prior post about a bedtime routine for a 4 month old.
DD is about 3.5 months old and we're having a hard time finding her bedtime and getting her down for the night. By 6:30pm she is cranky--she's tired. So I will go to her room and do a quick routine--lights out, sound machine on, jammies, lotion and swaddle, then nurse mostly to sleep, put her down in bassinet (in her own room). She will invariably wake up after she's been put down, sometimes right away, and sometimes after a few minutes of "napping". She'll fuss and cry and needs her bassinet to be rocked until 8:15 or 8:30, after which time she is out. Only occasionally does she go down easily. She is too tired to stay up until 8:00pm, but she often doesn't seem to settle until then. I'm not sure what to do, I hate that it takes almost two hours to get her down for the night, especially when I have a 22 month old that needs tons of attention. When DH is not home at night (he works late a lot), it's a disaster. When he is home, he tends to DD#1 and I miss out on spending time with her. She goes to bed at 7:30 and needs about 30-40 minutes for her bedtime routine. Any ideas?
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Re: Bedtime for a 3 Month Old
There is NO bedtime for a 3 month old. Why are you spending hours trying to get her to conform to your schedule when you should be doing whatever you can to conform to hers?
HOLD that baby.
I'm not trying to get her to "conform" to my schedule, I'm trying to figure out when she is ready for bed. I believe that is what I said, if you read carefully. I said that she is clearly too tired to stay awake any longer, and wants to go to sleep, but has a hard time with it. I was looking for helpful advice, not advice like "hold your baby" when I obviously hold and comfort my child. I suppose you missed the part of my post where I stated that I have a 22 month old who goes to bed at 7:30 and needs tending too in the evenings and a husband who works late a lot.
As far as her nap schedule, she sleeps about 45 minutes after 1.5 to 2 hours of awake time all day long.
I actually do believe in a bedtime for a 3 mo old and a sleep schedule. It will help you and your 22 mo old know what to expect and how the evening will go and will ultimately be less stressful.
I asked about the nap times because at 3 months my DS would take an early evening nap. Then, he'd be awake for 2 hours and then back to bed. but sleep begets sleep so the earlier you get her down, the better rest she will have.
I'm wondering if you can do a combo of bedtimes for both girls. Do the nursing and rocking of the baby while sitting and reading and getting your 22 mo old to bed. Also, if there's a way to shorten the 22 mo old's going-to-bed routine that would help ease up the pressure. We get my DS down in less than 15 minutes and that really would help.
When DD was 3 months, she would usually fall asleep at ~7ish and sleep until 630am when she was STTN. Her bedtime was always around 7, before STTN, she would wake up around midnight for a bottle (DH would give) and then wake up in the morning.
Hey Charmgal- the problem with babies is that they like to be snug as a bug in a rug...and the second you put her in that cold bassinet from your warm arms she's thinking- "OH no you're not!"
There are 3 solutions to that problem- one would be to keep the room at a cool temp and swaddle her in a Blanket...
The other - which worked best for us- was to use one of those fuzzy blankies and stretch it tight over the mattress (they now sell sheet out of that fabric too) - it immediately reflects the babies body heat and makes her fell so much more comfy...
If you want to eer on the safe side you can also get a warming bottle and but it in her bassinett before you start the night time routine...remove right before placing her in and put her on the warmed spot...that should do the trick...
Once she gets a bit older try to rouse her a bit before unlatching and place a in her crib before she is totally conked out.
Hope that helps!
My daughter used be impossible to keep awake after 6pm until she turned 1...and would do the same to us so we did the cozy blanket which did the trick...
#1 what about swaddling still?
#2 maybe she's not ready for a full night of sleep yet - could you try putting her down a little earlier for a nap (w/ very little sleep routine - i.e. bottle/nurse and rocking) and then maybe she'll wake up around 7:30/8 play a little, feed again, bedtime routine, etc.
DD #1 passed away in January 2011 at 14 days old due to congenital heart disease
DD#2 lost in January 2012 at 23 weeks due to anhydramnios caused by a placental abruption
DD -- 5YO
DS -- 3YO
I feel ya! have an older DD too, who goes to bed around 7:30 and sleeps great, so I really want to get our baby doing the same thing! She has picked her own 7:30 bedtime since she was ~6 weeks, so trying to establish a routine for DS has been trickier.
I don't really think there's a lot you can do at this age. I'm not trying to force him into anything. I usually nurse him a lot or whatever until he seems like he's getting sleepy and try to put him down as much as it takes. Last night he had a "nap" from 7-8, so I was able to be with my DD more than usual. I just think-- it isn't forever and we'll be playing together as a family before you know it.
I do miss her though, which is tough. I've been trying to remember to make DH hold the baby, so I can get some time with her when DS isn't nursing.
GL-- it is hard! Fortunately for my DD, she is so bonded with her daddy, she doesn't really seem to be missing me too much.
This. My 4.5 month old JUST started going to sleep around 6:30-7 this week. Before that, it was 9-10 and she would have a nap in the evening. I miss having her up later since now we don't get to spend as much time with her, but I can also get more done in the evenings too. Anywho, it might be awhile before she's ready for such an early bedtime.
Thanks to everyone for the advice. I'm going to try to put DD#2 down for a nap around 6 or 6:30pm and try to shorten DD#1's routine. (Although DD#1 is in the "stall" phase right now, so that might be tough!) I've tried to hold the baby while reading to DD#1 but DD#1 gets a little jealous of "her" time. It's just a big adjustment for everyone.