DS is sitll like that - sometimes he's upset and sometimes i'ts like he's not even noticed. If it was an accident, something along hte lines of 'oh dear, next time we'll try and get it in the potty'. If he's being willful and cheeky and saying 'pee pee' but refuses to move off the couch, therefore wetting the couch? (Yeah, we had a bad week after we got back from PILs!) I tell him he's being naughty and knows better and we pee on the potty like big boys and girls.
I read that it's good to correct them with a mildly upset tone, "Pee & poo goes in the potty." Meaning, they are not in trouble, but it's not unimportant either.
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Re: what to say when there is accident