Infertility

wow...thanks mom....

so....my DH and I have been TTC for about 9+months now....

in the course of this journey, we've learned that I am factor V Leiden (hyper-coagulatory - which means a marked increase in risks of miscarriage, pre-eclampsia, premature birth and lowered birth weights) and that I have PCOS....pretty ucky combo, but my ob/gyn isn't too concerned right yet...

I'd been on Depo for about 3+yrs (actually started bc due to very painful ovulation - but didn't know I had PCOS) and stopped last year...

so back to the reason for this post....I was having a really bad day (you know the kind where all you wanna do is cry at the pampers commercials) and was on the phone with my mom....

at first she was so confused because "women in our family are very easily knocked up...men just have to look at us twice....no one's ever had to 'try' to pregnant....your aunt anne had twins twice without meaning to..."

and then she ranted on about the "evils of birth control and its affect on the body" and then insisted that my ob and all the other experts are wrong and its the bc that caused my PCOS and therefore it was my fault for being unable TC yet...

ouch....I know its not true....and I know she's just worried....but wow....thanks mom...

I know I sound awful....but it really shredded me....made all the tender spots really raw...and left me feeling really lonely...

 

 

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Re: wow...thanks mom....

  • Ugh, I am sorry. That is really hard. :(
    DS born 7.30.11
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  • Even though our moms love us and mean well, they can be as clueless as anyone else about IF and IF treatments. Sorry you're having a tough time.
    DS #1 on the way after 2 cycles of ART (IVF+FET) EDD 7/3/11
  • My mom was the same way when she first found out we were having trouble. Luckily she has changed and is very supportive and ask a lot of questions to learn about infertility. And my family is the same way about looking twice to get KU! I was so sure I would be pregnant in 3 months max! Boy was I wrong.
    After 3 years of infertility we were blessed with twin girls through private infant adoption.
    Forever our's October 17th 2012
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
  • yes the women in my family pop out babies left and right too. Often when they shouldn't! They have no understanding at all. My brother dealt with IF issues 20 years ago (he's much older than me) and I remember how it was all hush hush and nobody would say anthing about it to him but jsut talked about him behind his back.  I am sure that is the case now with me which is just so wrong and annoying.  Family members who have talked to me about it just beat around the bush - "so how did that doctor thing go"?

    My husbands family is wrose because they dont know there's a problem and keep asking why I haven't had a baby yet.  His brother recently had his 4th (I want to tell them all that this family already made enough babies and have used up the allotted quota!)

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    History of IF and 2.5 years TTC. The day we were to start our first IUI we received a call that changed our lives forever and 10 month old Olivia joined our family. Shortly thereafter we got a surprise BFP and baby 2 is due July 5, 2012

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  • If it makes you feel any better, I took BCPs for years and I don't have PCOS.  Actually, I have DOR.

    And the women in my family get knocked up easily too.  And I might have too if I had started trying to have a baby at 20.  But I didn't.  

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  • Ugh that's hard.  I took bcps for over 15 yrs, and I actually have no fertility issues (we have severe MFI).  So kind of negates ur mom's theory (if it makes u feel a bit better).

    Sometimes they just don't get it.  My mom suggested we fung shui our home, to help with our IF.  She also meant well, but not what u want to hear when ur shooting urself w drugs 3 times a day.

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  • I'm sorry that your mom isn't supportive in the way that you need her to be. Welcome and good luck on your treatments. I'd see if your background warrants an earlier recommendation for an RE, they know much more about TTTC than a standard OB/GYN.
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