she texted me with a pic....and it made me cry (bawled in fact)
i mean, i know i'm going to miss out on firsts but that one is avoidable, i would have loved to see her eat her first cracker! i guess she doesn't know what it's like to miss firsts b/c she was a SAHM when her daughter was a baby
plus, what if she had an allergic reaction and i wasn't around?!
she called and apologized but i'm still upset, i think it partly has to do with the fact that i'm depressed and switching meds
Re: DCP gave Charlotte a cracker without asking me :-(
Aww I'm sorry.
Have you ever had the talk with her about baby's "firsts"? When we went to do our daycare orientation with Evey, about a week before she started, I asked them how they handled things like that...would they automatically tell me if she sat foe the first time, or babbled for the first time, etc etc. They told me it was up to me, whatever I would be happy with.
I chose to have them stay mum on those things. I want all her firsts to be with us, so if she sat at daycare before she sat at home, I'll never know.
just to clarify, charlotte is the only baby she watches (she also has her own 4 year old). When we first talked she said she would only give her food that i gave her (baby food that has already been introduced) We haven't talked about table food but i assumed she would make the connection kwim? We LOVE her though and she treats C as if she were her own. She said it was b/c Charlotte was teething and DCP is into "natural living" so she would give something like a cracker instead of tylenol.
that was really long, but i'm glad you mentioned the first sitting, crawling etc.....i may ask her not to tell me, thanks :-)
really? i cried and you're being snarky with me ?
just out of curiousity, are you a SAHM or a working mom? b/c i guess if you don't work you wouldn't understand
This exactly. When LO was in DC -our DCP asked us this question when he started since she had her LOs at home with her - she knew how I felt. I told her not to tell me and she agreed to keep it to herself. Once I mentioned him doing it at home - she knew it would be ok to talk about in the future.
yep
It is a cracker! I get it's her first but I guess I just don't see the big deal.
I work part time and was/am a nanny. As a nanny I guess I just see the side where you would be super hard to work for.
wow, i am actually really easy to work with, you're jumping to the conclusion that I am hard to work with because I cried over a cracker? you are a piece of work, and i thought you were one of the "nice" bumpies. you may have also missed the part about me being depressed, or maybe you just don't care
either way, i should just DD this whole frikin post
all i said was "please don't introduce new foods without asking me first" that's IT
I totally understand. I almost cried last night bc FIL gave her a bath while I asked him to watch her for a few minutes while I showered. (they live upstairs)
He thought he was doing me a favor but giving her a bath is my favorite time of day and I adore it.
I think if he took it upon himself to feed her something new I would cry, and tell MIL who would probably beat him senseless.
Oh BB I am sorry I am pmsing and having a bad day. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I get that it's hard when our babies are growing up before our eyes especially when we miss the big moments. I cried because DS got a tooth last night and I never even noticed it before so I am pretty pathetic myself
aww i'm sorry, i love bath time too
and i'm glad i'm not the only one :-)
ok, truce
TY, you're making me feel better, you rock (sending good karma your way)
I totally get it. My MIL gave J his first bite of baby food EVER.
Yes. You read that right.
So, there is a bright side. Tonight, when you get home after your evening feeding give lo another cracker. Being that it's still the same day, and a very new concept you can experience the FIRST DAY LO had a cracker & see the reaction of WTH is this in my mouth. Really, that will count as the first!
I gotta agree with Murfygirl on this one. It's a cracker for crying out loud. and I am a working mom.
Nope, I don't think you are out of line at all. I'd be upset too.
We have the same "rules" with DCP - no new food that we haven't intro'd at home. And don't tell us any firsts until we mention them.
She texted me a picture of my DS in a baby swing (like at the park) and about how much he loved it and I cried. We had never done that before and I wanted to see his sweet little face and reaction the first time he was swinging.
It's hard. Hang in there!
Happy Birthday, little man. We love you so much!
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i totally can't figure out if this is sarcastic or sincere lol
wow, i created drama over a cracker ::facepalm::
I am totally serious. No sarcasm.
I am sorry I can't come across right. I have totally had days where this stuff goes down, and while in 10 years you may go "OMG it was just a cracker" in the here and now it's a big deal to you. So, when I start spiraling in my head about this shizz I try to find a positive spin (i.e.- suggestion about doing the cracker thing again tonight at home).
thanks, and you're right, it will still be new to ME...it's a good idea
now DCP is texting me pics of C with babyfood all over her face to cheer me up :-)
i'm gonna PIP
Well, im on the fence on this one. I think you are a little over emotional due to depression, understandable. Can't hold that against you.
I'd be TICKED if DC was giving my LO food with out my permission (i have been, it has happened..graham crackers, ritz crackers)....but I wouldn't be worried about missing her first "cracker" noming.
I'm sorry it upset you, but on the bright side of things, she did apologize and will probably be more vigilant in the future.
ahaha, I love it.
Same with my daycare. But she did also give Jeanne her first cookie (Nilla wafer). I was also heartbroken. I didn't so much worry about the reaction because she is certified and licensed, and she would be able to handle if something occurred. It still hurt though, so you aren't alone.
While it IS just a cracker, it is also time you are missing with your LO and a new experience that you were not there for... I get why you are upset. But I gotta say, you sound like you have a really great daycare provider, so that's a plus! At least she was honest, apologetic, etc. She sounds like she is very caring, so I think that is awesome even if she did sort of screw the cracker thing up.
DCP 'found' DS first tooth. He'd been teething hardcore and I picked him up one afternoon and she says, 'his tooth popped through!' I was pretty bummed she 'found' it first, but oh well.
FWIW, things can seem way worse when you are depressed than they really are or should be. Don't beat yourself up. And like a PP said, enjoy some crackers tonight and put it in the baby book!
Panda, I agree with you. But I never asked MIL not to introduce new foods. Once we got past six months I said you can give her everything except, strawberries, honey, peanuts or PB or meat.
I don't think I would care.
I do understand where you are coming from because you feel like you missed out on a moment, but at the same time I can tell you that since your DCP has a 4 year old she probably didn't think twice about handing your LO the cracker. To her it's just a cracker. Once someone has an older child, you just don't think about the significance of every first bite of food anymore. She wasn't trying to step on your toes or go against your wishes.
I think once you get over it, you will look back and not think its such a big deal.
well, it is thebump. I get why you are upset, and I am so sorry. I was furious and cried because my SIL got a picture of DS and posted as HER profile pic on Facebook before I even got home from the hospital! i tried to tell myself that I got so upset from being hormonal, but that crap still pisses me off. Hope your day gets better!
My sister works in a daycare and the other day a little boy in her charge was walking all over the place. She assumed that he had been doing it over the weekend so when the parent came in she went on and on about how well the baby was walking. Lo and behold these were his first independent steps. My sister couldn't believe it. She said that he was zooming all over the room and looked as though he was been walking forever. She said she felt terrible because the mother looked so upset. As a rule she always keeps mum about firsts. Maybe it was an accidental admission.
I am a SAHM but I understand that you would be upset. My mother came over to spend time with DS today while I showered, straightnened my hair, etc. Right before I got in the shower DS pushed himself up on his hands and knees. Right away I, jokingly exclaimed, "Don't you dare crawl while I'm in the shower!" I would have been upset if I missed it.
Have a talk with the daycare provider and let her know that if your child has a "first" you would rather not know about it and experience it for yourself.