Can I start the party?
Mine is lame, but...
WTF body? I get that you're full term, and you're feeling it, but we still have to work here, mmkay? Being 1/2 hour late to work just because of dragassing around is not acceptable. Kthxbye.
Surely someone has some better ones than this. ![]()


Re: WTF Wednesday?
WTF neighbors? Halloween decorations are inherently tacky, but yours are SUPER tacky. Where did you even buy them? Do you really need five tombstones, two skeletons, a one-foot spider with web and various other shiit taking up your ENTIRE front yard? I almost tripped on the sidewalk because I was so blinded by the tackiness.
Oh, and leash your fat, barking dog.
The two men in my life. Oh, and I have a husband too...
I have a couple today.
WTF
WTF Natalie, can you point your head in the right direction so mommy doesnt have to get cut open?
WTF blood pressure? why dont you just go ahead and make me explode!
WTF pre-e.... you come you go,.. I am so confused.
WTF bladder... can you stop filling up so damn fast?!
WTF Pennsylvania weather... its 74 & sunny one day, and today its 38 degrees?!? get a grip!
Oh I have several today....
WTF movement?! There used to be so much that it was boarderline annoying and now I barely get my 10 in 2 hours? Stop making me nervous!
WTF BIL?! Stop breaking our combine!!! I mean how hard is it to pay attention while you are harvesting? Oh and when you break it it is your fault not ours!!!
WTF Uncle?! Stop being a jacka$$ about selling the family land! There is a contract saying you can't sell it to anyone other than family, which means you can't sell it to anyone unless they are FAMILY!!!!!!!!!! You A$$!
I have many more this week but I will stop with those.
WTF, sleep. Just WTF.
WTF, President Obama and Senator Murray? You have to have a political rally less than 1/2 mile from the hospital I'm delivering at the day I'm due to go home. Seriously? That is going to eff up traffic around the hospital like whoa. I'm just going to want to go home!
WTF, Kit Kats? Why are you so tasty? WHY?
Unable to even.
********************
You don't understand the appeal of Benedict Cumberbatch / think he's fug / don't know who he is? WATCH SHERLOCK. Until you do, your negative opinion of him will not be taken seriously.
WTF MIL, you are clearly lying to get out of coming to my baby shower. This is not about gifts but celebrating your first grandchild and you don't want to come because you don't like my mom.
WTF DH, where is the love? You now walk ahead of me because I'm too slow and rarely even give me kisses like you used to.
WTF car, quit stalling out every time my RPMs go below 1,000.
WTF Buffalo Wild Wings, why do I crave you SO much.
WTF Hormones!!!! I'm sick of crying for no reason! Enough with the water works already!
WTF LC!!! Do you have to strike when I'm walking in public, I'm freaking people out... all of a sudden I stop abruptly and grab my belly with a grasp! LOL!!!
This was fun! I needed to vent Thanks!
This is my first WTF contribution!
WTF doctor's receptionist? You have my work number and my cell number, WHY would you leave a message on my home phone asking if I can come in within the hour instead of the next day (technically that was from yesterday, but still).
WTF doctor? How do you not tell me until 36 weeks that I have been measuring 2 weeks ahead since 22 weeks! This is information I should know (my fault, I guess, for assuming that you'll automatically share anything out of the ordinary!).
This for me too! I'm so sorry it takes you 10 seconds longer to walk through the parking lot, but you look like an @ss walking 20 feet ahead of your pregnant wife.
This! And..
WTF "friends" with kids? I'm tired of hearing "...you think you're tired now, you just wait!" I don't care what the reason is for not being able to sleep - the result is still the same. Shaddup and quit telling me how awful it will be, seriously. Oh, and while you're at it, why don't you QUIT telling me how difficult your birth process was. This is my first baby, and I really don't want to go into delivery scared out of my mind. Kthanks.
For this child I prayed, and the LORD has given me my petition which I asked of him.
1 Samuel 1:27
DX PCOS
Success with #1 after Femara + Trigger + IUI
This for me too!
And
WTF Steven Harper? How have you completely destroyed Canada's international reputation so completely?! Then you blame it on other politicians in other parties? Seriously, you make my blood boil, you douchebag!
WTF house Why do you not just clean yourself?? I dust & sweep & mop & feel accomplished, but then you feel it necessary to point out the spots I missed. JUST FIX IT!
WTF speed. I have none. It takes me 3 times as long to do half as much as I used to. grrr!
I will use one of my WTF, to WTF for you!! That sucks and I hope it isn't too much trouble for you to get home!
My WTF: WTF gallbadder!! Why are you a problem? I don't want to have surgery right after having a baby!! Please resolve on your own after I deliver!
WTF post office? You want to charge me $18 to "overnight" something from OH to PA and it won't get there until Friday? Or I can pay $5 for Priority Mail and it will still get there Friday? Neat overnight service.
Oh, and I just had a Kit Kat bar and it was delish!
WTF DH? You tell me just as I'm drifting off to sleep the other night that you "have had a premonition that something bad is going to happen", then wonder why I'm so freaked out and can't sleep?
WTF Rexall Drugs? Your sign says you open at 8 a.m., yet here I am, standing outside your doors, which are still locked at 8:10. AGAIN.
WTF sinuses? You couldn't give me a bit of a break with the pressure and pain during pregnancy? I can't even take anything remotely strong enough to deal with you!
I've got another one:
WTF, pregnancy paranoia? I've been sitting here for the last 2 hours analyzing random pains in my body and trying to figure out whether or not I'm in labor or if my body is just spazzing on me today. Monday can't come soon enough.
Unable to even.
********************
You don't understand the appeal of Benedict Cumberbatch / think he's fug / don't know who he is? WATCH SHERLOCK. Until you do, your negative opinion of him will not be taken seriously.
I shall join in on the fun!
WTF coworkers, I am gone for not even a week and one of you deletes the f-ing printer which took me approx. five flippen hours to install in the first place! (bangs head against desk)
WTF MIL, just WTF
Ooohh, this looks fun:
WTF cold virus? GO AWAY!! It's bad enough I freak DH out because I sound like I'm choking in my sleep when my nose is clear clear but now I'm all stuffed up and neither one of us is getting any sleep or any action. UGH!
WTF boss! There is too much to type about you. I know you are the micromanager from hell but seriously, we can handle things here without you.
WTF October weddings. Did they have a sale on them and that's why everyone and their mama is getting married this month? Seriously??