3rd Trimester

Is it OK for my mom to throw my shower?

I was laid off from work, so my mom was going to throw my shower... but then one of her friends told her this is tacky and unheard of! I have no sisters, no female cousins and no aunts on this side of the country. Is it really wrong for my mom to host the shower? Or is this a generational difference (mom is almost 70 and her friend is older than she is)?

Help!

Re: Is it OK for my mom to throw my shower?

  • I think this is a regional thing.  My mom hosted a shower for me and all my friends' mom's hosted their showers.  Just the way things are done in my area.
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  • I don't see a problem with it. My mom , aunt and best friend threw mine. I think as long as you are not throwing your own.
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  • she is your mother, I dont see why she cant be just as excited as anyone else to do it.
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  • Yes.  It's fine.

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  • I don't know what the big deal is! My mom is throwing me a baby shower, and I don't think it's tacky! I have NEVER heard that it is "wrong" at all. Maybe her crotchety old friend is confused between a BRIDAL shower (thrown by MOH) and a BABY shower! Do what you want...it's your baby shower.
    ~ Mrs. G
  • I think it's reigonal. My mom threw my baby shower and my bridal shower. I think it's fine.
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  • Lately it is more acceptable for a mother to throw the mom-to-be a shower. Think hard about it though. My mom offered to throw my shower and it's this weekend and she is making it torture and awful for me. I wish I had no shower at all had I known the crap she'd drag me through.

    Had I looked at the way she planned other parties and what not and realized she'd project herself this way I wouldn't have fathomed her doing mine.

     

  • My mom threw my bridal and my baby shower and my MIL threw both for DH's side of the family.  All of my friend's mom's threw them their showers.  It is completely regional as well as a family thing.  Some families/areas it is normal and for others a big no no.  Only you can answer this question.  If people think it is tacky, they won't come.
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  • My mom hosted mine. All my friend's moms hosted theirs.
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  • It's absolutely fine, as long as you're not throwing yourself a shower or it's for a 2nd, 3rd, etc. child.
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  • My mom threw both of my baby showers and I see no problem with it.
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  • My mom & my brother (of all people) threw my shower.  Technically, my mom funded the shower, my brother hosted the shower.  How hilarious!
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  • imageheckysue:
    If you want to be suuuuuper technical it is frowned according to traditional etiquette, but that's so old-fashioned.  It's very common these days and I don't see anything wrong with it in the slightest.

     

    This.  My mom mentioned it about my sisters a few years back because some people feel it is wrong to ask people to give your child gifts.  But i think that age is passed, since it is pretty traditional to have a shower in general.

  • imageheckysue:
    If you want to be suuuuuper technical it is frowned according to traditional etiquette, but that's so old-fashioned.  It's very common these days and I don't see anything wrong with it in the slightest.

     

    This.  My mom mentioned it about my sisters a few years back because some people feel it is wrong to ask people to give your child gifts.  But I think that age is passed, since it is pretty traditional to have a shower in general.

  • My mom is throwing my shower. I agree, as long as you aren't throwing it yourself I think it's fine. 

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  • ABSOULUTELY! My mom and fiance planned a surprise shower for me and it was amazing!!!! I had such a good time and it was super cute! I don't see why your mom couldn't throw a shower for you. I see nothing tacky about it, she's your mother,she knows you better than anyone else so you would probably like her shower better than if anyone else did it.
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  • What has been done at other wedding/baby showers you've been to? In my group of friends the mom doesn't throw the shower, friends do. Strictly speaking, a mom or sister shouldn't throw a shower, but if your group of friends typically does this then they might not think twice about it. Would your mom invite this friend of hers? She would obviously be offended.
  • I don't see it being a problem
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  • I think it might have been considered tacky back in the day, but times are a-changin'.

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  • my mom is doing mine...  i don't have anyone else who would do it for me.
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  • seriously, man.  If your mom wants to throw it for you, let her.  Anyone having issues with it can suck it.  There are waaaaay bigger things in this world to even THINK about than this! 

  • Totally fine!  My mom is helping plan mine along with my MIL and a good friend.  Everyone is so busy it only seemed fair that they share in the responsibility.  They all offered to help and I'm happy to have them all be a part of it.
  • I've never had an issue with mom's hosting their daughter's shower, in fact its pretty much the norm in my family. My mom is the main host of mine with help from other close family and a couple of friends.
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