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3rd Trimester
MadHatter17
member
Breastfeeding - Is anyone thinking of not?
MadHatter17
member
To be completely honest, I'm not really excited about the idea of breastfeeding. It isn't something that really interests me at all. This is our first child so, I obviously don't know much about it and am definitely going to try it out when the baby is born. I may love it. As of now, if the baby isn't too keen on it, I won't be crushed by it.
Does anyone else feel this way? Anyone not planning to breastfeed? I feel like it's a socially unacceptable thing to say that you don't want to nurse.
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Re: Breastfeeding - Is anyone thinking of not?
It's 100% a personal choice and I know many people who formula feed perfectly healthy, happy babies (some because of personal choice, others because breastfeeding just did not work out for them for physical/health reasons).
Since you won't know how it'll go for you until you get there, you might as well give it a shot (that's kind of how I'm approaching it -- I won't hate myself if it doesn't work out for some reason, but the potential health and cost benefits are enough to make me at least try it.)
Yes- all of the above. (and other reasons)
and yes, it is very socially unacceptable to say. Both my mother and mil are personally horrified.
In birthing class we didn't even talk of any other options than breastfeeding after birth. My lovely DH raised his hand and asked about formula feeding moms. All eyes were definitely on me and the nurse asked me to stay after class for "helpful" literature.
But you need to advocate for what you're comfortable with.
I'm not breastfeeding. I didn't BF with DD either and she turned out fine.
I've just never wanted to and I'm not going to stress myself out over it. Also, I'd only be able to do it while on maternity leave as my work schedule does not allow for me to leave every 2 hours to go pump.
::lurking from 3-6:::
I just wanted to tell you OP, that it's definitely something you have to be really committed to. I went into it with an open mind, thinking "I'm gonna give this my very best shot, but if it doesn't work out, oh well"
Well, I'm 3 1/2 months in, and I'm just now starting to really enjoy it. In the beginning, you feel like a cow. The baby seems to eat constantly, especially during growth spurt times, and it can be very daunting.
I went from "CRAP this HURTS" in the first 3 days, to "Ehh... it doesn't hurt anymore but this is getting kinda old"... to now I enjoy it. It's great to be able to have a cure-all when DD is crying loudly. And it's awesome to not have to deal with bottles, formula, etc if I don't want to. If I have my boobs, she has her food. And of course, you feel good knowing that your body is giving her the perfect food.
If you decide to go the formula route, there's nothing wrong with that. But if you decide to go the breastfeeding route, I encourage you to stubbornly stick through it. The beginning is hard, but once you get through the first month or 2, things get super easy.
GL!
I'm not breastfeeding.
PP, our birthing class was like yours. They never mentioned anything except bf-ing.
Im not BF... It was never an option for me in my mind. Yes Ive been flamed, here and IRL about it.
But it is totally up to you. I suggest knowing the pros and cons of both BF and FF...
Im well aware of the pros for BF... and To those that can do it YAY! Im very impressed to say the least.
I just know I would nto be able to handle it. I know I will stress, and goodness if it didnt work out for me I know Id have a hard tiem handling it.
Also from doing research about it, i know there are meds Id like to get back on asap, that wouldnt be great for BF....
I also decided to not pump because it is still the same demands on my body and mind as the actual BF.
If you decide to not BF, there will be people that get on your case about it. I had a friend of my H's try to talk to me into it. This man I barely knew was loudly in public talking about my boobs and how I should want the "best" for my baby.. and couldnt believe I was being so "selfish" about it.
When that happens you can:
Sit there and defend your choice
Just nod and smile
Change the subject...
But you shouldnt let others influence you to BF or not to BF..
It is TRULY a decision that is 110% up to you.
I'm not BF. I've known since before I got pregnant that it wasn't for me and being pregnant hasn't changed that. It's a personal choice and I feel like formula feeding will work best for our lifestyle.
I know my in laws are kind of horrified that I would choose not to BF, but in my family it's just kind of the norm. I don't think any of the women have BF and the kids in that family are some of the healthiest that I know.
As always, to each their own.
"A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bankroll smaller, home happier, clothes shabbier, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for"
I'm not going to breastfeed. It's a personal choice that my DH and I made together since it makes the most sense for our family.
I'm dealing with the socially unacceptable thing... but so far have been able to stick to my guns and defend my decision. Good luck!
I agree. It is very painful and very difficult in the beginning, if you are not 100% committed to it FF is easy.
Just and FYI we weaned DD at 8.5 months (BFP and my supply dropped) and we now spend about $200 a month on formula alone!! Now with the recall and we can only buy ready-made our cost has increased 15-20% per month.
Something to think about
I did not BF DD and will not BF this one. I didn't even try with DD, *gasp*. I'm with you. I just don't feel committed to it. I'm not even really sure why. And I also feel like it's not socially acceptable for me to say that outloud. I think it's a personal choice that doesn't have to be defended to anyone. It is what it is. I personally could care less how one feeds their child so why should anyone care how I do.
And, along with the others and their birthing classes, at my OB orientation, the nurse said, "The baby will be handed to you immediately to start BFing. We are very pro-BFing here." I was left thinking, uh..... I didn't ask questions, but I was kinda put off by that, just cuz there was no mention whatsoever of what if you weren't or could not BF.
BFing is really hard. Especially if you have supply problems. I can't tell you how many days and nights I cried because I was frustrated, pumping all the freakin' time, trying to get more than half an ounce. So if you're of a mind to give it a try and then switch, I think it's perfectly fine. We had to switch when I got pregnant unexpectedly when DD was 3 months old. I did pump and gave her what supply I had, but we definitely supplemented with formula, and it was SUCH a relief.
A couple things to think about though - especially if you have good supply, during the first couple months.
1) You wake up in the middle of the night, and it's so much easier to BF, than to have to make up a bottle and feed. I hated washing bottles all the time!
2) When you're going out, you don't have to pack up all the formula stuff. It's easier if your LO doesn't care about the temperature of the bottle, but my DD will NOT drink formula if it's not very very warm... So it's really hard on the road, if we're going anywhere.
3) It definitely is cheaper to BF. I was surprised at how fast we go through formula! It is very costly.
But even with all those reasons, I was so much happier FFing... BFing came with so much stress and guilt.
DD #1 passed away in January 2011 at 14 days old due to congenital heart disease
DD#2 lost in January 2012 at 23 weeks due to anhydramnios caused by a placental abruption
I didn't bf last time and I won't be this time either. it just isn't for me.
I'm not either, and same thing as above..
Just an added perspective- if you use generic formula, formula feeding isn't really much more expensive than BF, if at all. The government regulates formula tightly, so that whether you use Similac or Target up and up, your baby has to be getting the same nutrients. If you need soy formula or something, that's different cuz I'm not sure generic brands make specialty formulas. But once you buy or rent a breast pump, buy nursing pads, lansolin, bras, maybe a visit or two to the lactation consultant, etc breastfeeding isn't cheap either. I always laugh when I read in a book that one of the benefits to breastfeeding is that it's free.
You have got to be kidding me. I spent $80 on a breastpump, $10 on nursing pads, $15 for some natural nipple cream, and $40 on nursing tanks and a bra (I went back to wearing normal bras after my supply regulated). I was able to BF my daughter for a year and never had to spend any money on formula. I'm guessing that you spent more than $145 for a year's supply of formula. Plus, I'm able to use most of those supplies for future children. Yes, I needed to invest in some supplies. Breastfeeding is WAY cheaper than using formula, even if you buy generic.
To the OP, while BF is demanding early on, it is very much worth it. You know exactly what is going into your LO's body and don't have to place your faith in some formula company, hoping that there aren't bugs and other junk being fed to them.
Well aren't you a treat? OP - If you don't want to bf, don't let others make you feel crappy about it. It's your decision. Honestly, bf'ing for me was a PITA and I will happily FF next time. You might want to check out FearlessFormulaFeeder if you haven't already.
These arguments are pointless. Her comment was completely obnoxious. But to play along - you have no guarantees with bf'ing either. You don't know that your milk will come in. You don't know that your supply won't suddenly go to shiit. You don't know whether LO with ever latch. You don't know whether LO will have a sensitivity to something or lots of things that you eat. Just because BM doesn't get recalled doesn't mean bf'ing is all unicorns and daisies.
Generic formula can be much cheaper. I was comparing prices at Costco the other day, the Similac is 35.00 for a 1 lb 9oz container and the generic Kirkland was 17.00 for the same size as the Similac. The generic has the exact same ingredients as the name brand.
I plan on doing both. I was able to nurse/pump with my son and he was also supplemented with formula.
(runs in from 6-9)
Just to play devil's advocate for a sec...
I can say that I had not intended to breastfeeding. I planned to exclusively pump so LO would get the nutrients from BM but I wouldn't have to be the only feeder. (DH and I wanted to share responsibilities, and I planned to go back to work in 3 months, so LO would need to take bottles). To appease my DH and mom, I said I would at least try it once to see if I liked it.
However, the choice was taken away from me because LO came 10 weeks early and was tube fed for the first 6 weeks of her life, so pumping became my only option. After pumping exclusively this time and having LO go straight to bottles once she was off the tube, I can say that I wouldn't do it any other way next time around. My LO will take a bottle from anyone, which makes it easy to leave her with my parents, IL's the nanny, etc. Plus, I was able to give her 5 months of breastmilk without having to be the feeding vessel, so I felt good that she got the nutrients of the BM, which important to me because she was so teeny.
Bottom line, do what is right for you. I recommend pumping if you don't want to breastfeed, but even if you choose to go right to formula, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that...you are feeding your baby and thats all that matters!