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tips on how to prevent abduction/molestation
A gal on my MoMs board posted this, this is all stuff she learned at a lecture by a guy who specializes in this area. Very scary stuff, but so necessary with kids.
teach your child: (a lot of this is for kids 5+)
-if they are ever taken by someone- to keep spitting on the ground... search dogs will pick up the scent.
-know
your child's shoes - abductors will often cut a child's hair, change
their clothes, even dye hair, shortly after taking them- but rarely
change their shoes. Shoes that stand out = a good thing.
-teach
your child how to point out the state you live in on a map. If they are
found with someone in another state and asked where they live- the
police will show them a map.... and of course- teach them their address,
parents names, phone numbers.
-how to choose someone who can
help in an emergency (ie- you get lost in a store) = pregnant woman,
woman with a child or pushing a stroller, or woman who looks like a
grandma.... statistically, these women will help and not hurt a child.
-don't
ever force your child to hug/kiss someone to thank them for a gift...
this teaches entitlment, which molesters use to touch kids... "i gave
you that present, I deserve a hug/kiss" type situations.
-teach
your child if they are ever taken to run away/escape if they can- no
matter what they are told by the person - teach them that mommy/daddy
will always be OK (abductors often say they will kill mommy/daddy if the
child runs away).
-teach your child never to let someone other than mommy/daddy, etc - touch or VIEW their parts covered by a bathing suit.
-if
your child goes missing in a store, etc - immediately start to yell "I
can't find my child!!"... time is the enemy- do not worry about causing a
scene.... And call for the child at his/her level - so the sound will
travel better to their ears.... and call for child in a nice voice----
if you yell in a mad or scared voice they might hide thinking they are
in trouble.
-he doesn't recommend looking up your area on that
website that lists sex offenders b/c it's usually about 6 months behind,
and so many child molesters are not registered b/c they were never
arrested - usually when someone is arrested for molestation they have
already molested 20+ children. He feels the website gives a false sense
of security if nobody shows up in your area. NO area is safe. Always
take precautions with your kids.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: tips on how to prevent abduction/molestation
Meredith, 6-1-06 and Alex, 11-5-09
52 Choices For Better Health
me too. I hate that there are people I have to protect my boys from and worry about.
thanks for posting, it's all so scary. Another good tip I heard from a mom friend is to take a picture of your kid w/ your cell phone whenever you are in a situation where an abduction/lost child might be more likely (large crowds, airports, sea world, etc). That way you have a picture to show police/others to help you describe him.
I especially like this one:
"-don't ever force your child to hug/kiss someone to thank them for a gift... this teaches entitlment, which molesters use to touch kids... "i gave you that present, I deserve a hug/kiss" type situations."
I think it's important that we teach our kids early on that their bodies are THEIRS and they should never be forced to open themselves up to anyone. Ever.
Me too.
I'm a lurker, and I'm late to post, but here are my thoughts...
I love the tips about teaching children basic information that can help someone help them find their way if they get lost or separated from you (something that is likely to happen). However, I'm bothered by the strong emphasis on preparing for a stranger kidnapping event (something that is so incredibly rare). In the grand scheme, I feel this does more harm than good by instilling an unnecessary level of fear in parents and in children. Of course, I strongly support the simple & obvious things like "Don't get in a car with a stranger", education on appropriate & inappropriate touching, etc. But teaching a kid to spit on the ground if abducted, and being told (as a parent) that you should start yelling in a store if you lose sight of your mobile kid for a second feels more like fear mongering than reasonable preparation...and also normalizes a culture of fear. Seeing that it is such an unlikely event, is this over-preparedness unnecessarily creating children who are constantly fearful of being snatched up? Also, I think that if we're being told by these experts to prepare for such an unlikely scenario, then what about the millions of other scary, but just-as-unlikely, scenarios? Seems we tend to worry about the most frightening instead of the most likely.
Anyhow, I mean no disrespect, just thought I'd share another perspective.
"British author Warwick Cairns, author of How to Live Dangerously, calculated that a child would need to stand outside alone on a street for 750,000 hours to guarantee a stranger would abduct them."