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Babies: 0 - 3 Months
Any colicky babies? Please let me vent for a moment.
I am starting to lose my mind. I feel like a horrible mother to my other two boys - I never get to spend quality time with them and they have seen me cry a few times.
My LO is colicky. He hates his carseat. Cries the moment I put him in it, screams the entire drive. Hates the swing. Cries within 2 seconds of putting him in it. Hates the bjorn, hates the moby wrap. Likes his bouncy seat but only when he is happy which is only 2 hours out of the entire day. Wants to be held every minute of the day. Has to be rocked to sleep, once asleep is impossible to put down swaddled or not. Once put down and asleep he wakes to the tiniest change in noise even with a sound machine blaring. He is only happy when he is on my boob. I can't do anything with myself because he is always in my arms. My shoulders ache and I get depressed when I think about how much time is passing around me. I feel like my kids are growing up without me. They think I am a nut job. They are so great about understanding that mommy can't do much because she has to take care of the baby...but what do they REALLY think? I feel like a horrible mom like they think I have abandoned them. When I get time to spend with them it's never for very long.
I probably need to go on some antidepressant but I really don't want to because I am breastfeeding. Otherwise I would LOVE some. I have good days as long as I don't think about all the above and if I am around people. But some days are so long and so lonely. DH helps some but he's also busy taking care of our two boys. It just sucks not knowing when all this is going to get better.
Is there anyone else out there that can relate to this? It is really hard to have the third child be the colicky one.
Thank you for letting me vent.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Any colicky babies? Please let me vent for a moment.
Colicky baby mom here. I know, this is so tough. It's so exhausting mentally, physically and emotionally. There is no time for anything it seems. And yes, I feel like a bad mom too.
I am completely worn down and frustrated.
Zoloft is a safe anti-depressant for breastfeeding and pregnancy. There is no reason to not get treated for PPD because of breastfeeding.
More info on the medications here:
https://www.kellymom.com/health/meds/antidepressants-hale10-02.html#specificdrugs
https://toxnet.nlm.nih.gov/cgi-bin/sis/htmlgen?LACT
I am in no way an expert however, it sounds like your LO might have reflux. Have you spoken to your pedi about that? DS did not like being put down and would take bottle after bottle like you wouldn't believe. After 2 weeks on zantac it got better. Also, if your drinking milk, drink whole milk, it has fewer proteins in it than milk with less fat (according to my pedi) and can help with reflux if DS is having difficulty digesting it. I am being treated for PPD and I am on generic paxil. The Dr. gave me the lowest dose possible and it has made a world of a difference. The Dr. said it was one of the safest anti-depressants for breast feeding women.
Is it possible for you to have someone come over and take care of LO so you can get out with your other boys? Just a thought, good luck!
DD #1 was colicky and the first four months of her life were rough going. I can't imagine how much harder it would have been if I'd had other children at the time. The good news is - kids are resilient. These first few months are just going to be a snap shot in time for your other kids and I'm sure they love you unconditionally. Colicky baby in the mix or not.
Make sure you're taking care of YOU too though. Like the PP mentioned - Zoloft is safe for BFing. I took it while nursing DD #1 and honestly wish I would have started with it sooner. It made a world of difference in how well I was able to cope.
After 5 weeks, things got a lot better for us. We couldn't put our LO down at all, even to nap during the day and then one day everything changed.
We now have a baby that naps in her swing, sleeps in her crib a 6-8 hour stretch at night followed by a 2-3 hour stretch, and rides in her car seat happily about 50% of the time (hey, that's a HUGE improvement for us!)
We did put her on Zantac since a lot of colic symptoms and reflux symptoms overlap. I'm not sure if it's the meds or just LO getting the hang of being an outside baby, but our life has drastically improved.
To get through the rough times, we would put LO in a carrier (while she was screaming her head off) and then turned on the vacuum and paced back and forth. This was our silver bullet and our only way to get things done around the house. We also used an exercise ball to bounce on while we watched TV so that we weren't constantly pacing back and forth. Screaming or not, we went for a walk everyday to help keep our sanity. Lastly, if she was changed, fed, and comfortable and was still not happy, then we would just take turns holding her and telling her we loved her. Good luck, it does get better!