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Babies: 6 - 9 Months
starryeyeddreamer
member
Sort of BR (and vent) - WWYD?
starryeyeddreamer
member
So back story - I quit my job of 3 1/2 years (I had the insurance and we are now on MH's - which is the same price but coverage isn't as good). I found a nanny job for an 11 week old baby and I could bring LO with me. Mom works from home. I knew I was taking a risk but the family seemed so nice and I had a great feeling about it. This was my first week - and of course Monday was a little rough - since LO has been in DC for 4 months - and he was in a strange place. He was very fussy but I didn't think it went that horribly. Tuesday - we were there for 2 hours and she kicked us out. She told me she didn't think it was working - and had me in tears because she told me LO was going to make me lose her job. He had been screaming for 10 minutes because she told me he couldn't be in the room near me while I was trying to get her baby to sleep (where he was being quiet). She basically made me feel like I shouldn't pay attention to my LO - which I was trying so hard to balance - and I thought I was balancing that pretty well. LO was in a strange place - and once he actually got used to their house - it would have gone great. LO never cries unless something is wrong - he is a great baby (but he has been super whiny this week). I took him to the Pedi to make sure he didn't have an ear infection or something that could explain why he had been so fussy for the 2 days. They said he had a cold - which I thought may be the case as DH and I were getting over one. He is teething and sick for the first time - so I let the mom know this. She told me she didn't want us back until Monday so her LO wouldn't get sick. Which I totally understood.
Then she EMAILS me today to say -
"MH and I have really been struggling to figure out the best situation for child care and my job. After a lot of thought, we have decided that having a nanny with a child just isn't going to work for our situation. I can't lose my job and I need to have the focus be on getting my work done the right way with minimal stress and having the maximum time possible to spend with LO during the day. We both feel so terrible-I really wanted this to work. I actually have someone close that is going to help us out when we need it and I think it will be the best thing for me, my job and my family. Again, we really like you so much and really wanted this to work and I'm so sorry that we have to make this decision.
We would like to pay you for the 1 week pay of $. We know that you left your old position and feel it's the least we can do. If you can give me your mailing address, I'll send you the $."
What would you say back to that? I am so worked up right now that I know I can't be nice back and need some opinions from people that aren't emotionally involved in the situation. I left my job of 3 1/2 years and she wants to give me 1 week of pay. Money is super tight as it is, and I was taking a pay cut to stay home with LO for this position. I feel like it is a slap in the face to offer me 1 week of pay. She gave it 9 hours to try - and to tell me it wasn't going to work. She didn't even give me a chance. I was still trying to figure out her LO also as every baby is different. I am so mad at myself for not getting something in writing about a 2 week notice or something - so I don't know if there is anything else I can do.
Little man # 1 - 03/05/2010
Little man # 2 - 05/02/2013
Little sister - 07/16/2015
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Sort of BR (and vent) - WWYD?
I really hate this for you. It's hard to say what i would write back... maybe something like
"I too am sorry this didn't work out for you. I know my LO was adjusting to a new place, so I know he was a little fussy. I wish we could give it another shot and let me try to balance the babies differently, but if not... thanks anyway."
I hope everything works out for you guys. Offering one week pay when she didn't really even give you a honest shot really IS the least she can do!
First of all I am sorry you lost your job as a nanny. It stinks that things went down the way they did. There are plenty of reasons she may have asked you to leave. Having someone in her house taking care of the baby may have just made her feel uncomfortable.She may felt out of place or may be your personalities didn't mesh. These things happen at work all the time. Sometimes things just don't work out.
To be honest I don't think she is required to pay you for the week. I understand that money is tight and you were counting on this job but if you respond rudely or defensively she may only pay you for the 9 hours. I would just respond by sending your address.
Thanks. I was thinking something along those lines but I have so many other things I want to say - but I wanted to be level headed about it too
. I realize she is "doing what is best for her" but my family got the worst of it and it sucks.
Thanks! If only Maine wasn't a 10 hour plus drive
.
Thanks. It was weird - because we got along great. When I was there on the first day - she sat down and talked to me for an hour and a half before she even started to do work. I honestly think she did have a hard time having someone else care for her baby - I know how hard it was to drop my LO off for the day at DC, so I definitely understand that. They waited until their LO was over 2 months old to even look for childcare - so its just hard she had to figure out she didn't actually want a nanny after I left my other job.
That's the thing - I want her to pay me for as much as she is willing to since I am going to be looking very hard for something else now. We can't survive on just DH's income. And I realize she probably has no obligation to me - but I guess I just couldn't do that to someone knowing they left their job for me and have a LO of their own to support. Just a horrible situation I realize I got myself into and it's hard.
I think it's very fair of them to offer to pay you for one week.
If she doesn't feel it's working out, she has every right to fire you and find a childcare position that works for her. You had to know that leaving your job for something new (new challenges, new location, etc.) could end up not working out. That's a risk you take whenever you take on a new job.
Do you have savings or anything to cover you while you figure things out?