Baby Names
Are the names of your EX's out?
Ever date a guy whose name you loved? But if DH knows about them, he might not be okay with using the name. For example I love the names Nick and Jason, but they also happen to be names of my ex bfs.
Do you and yours have an EX factor rule?
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Re: Are the names of your EX's out?
Yep.
I don't think it's cool to use ex's names, even if you simply like the name. It's strange. It looks strange.
Maybe yours doesn't, but my family has a strong association with Bryce (the ex name that I like). They would find it very odd if we used it, and I know DH wouldn't be comfortable with that.
It goes the other way, too. I like names with "Bree/Bri" in them, but DH was involved with a girl named Brianna, and he doesn't like the connection. Even though I could easily get over the connection, it weirds him out.
The bottom line is, you have associations with all kinds of names. And, honestly, I think it's legitimate to veto a name that you have any kind of strong association with. Bryce is always going to be my ex-boyfriend's name, even if I liked it before I met him--even if I like it for a girl. It's still his name, the way LuAnn is always my mom's name and David is always my dad's name.
The relationship ended for a reason. Don't use names that are going to remind you of negative relationships. And don't use names that are going to make YH uncomfortable.
Nope. I've always thought that was silliness, no offense intended to anyone who disagrees: )
My ex-fiance was Eric Joseph. My grandfather is Eric Joseph Thomas. My husband is Joseph Thomas. If I ruled out my ex's name, I'd also be ruling out my grandfather's and husband's names! We fully intend to give our first son Eric Joseph Thomas, ex be damned.
ETA: And it's not as if the positive associations with my husband, grandfather and other family members overrule the ex--my husband knows we'd be using my ex's name, but he never met the man, so why should he care?
I love the name Reed for a boy, but it's my ex's last name. I ruled it out because he and I were together for six years and almost got married. It would be way too weird to even consider using it.
I never had a EX but i would never use my hubbys ex name, #1 i HATE the woman and #2 i have a cousin with the same name and she isnt my fav person either. besides Kelli just isnt my style.
My problem is that I love the names of HIS xgfs and he won't get over it and let me use them! (Although to be fair we haven't had any daughters.) So great names like Fiona and Molly are probably never going to happen for me.
He has never suggested the names of any of the guys I have dated so it hasn't been an issue for us in that respect.
DH and I both came from horrible relationships - so those names are out for sure. (Matthew and Jessica are too common anyways!)
Yep. Which works in my favor because it also happens to be MIL's maiden name too, which Dh was pushing for.
Hehe, I did this, too. I dated two Chris's, but they weren't in a row. And one only lasted a month and a half.
Yes...it falls under the 'both parties have to at least like it' rule. And since most of us have positive and negative associations that make us love or hate a name more than we would normally, it's important to include that factor (hehehehe...Ex Factor..nice!).
If he knows of the names and the associations, I'd find it a bit mean to keep them on your list. It sucks, but I've had to toss a few myself.
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Me too. I dated two Chrises and it spanned almost eight years. I got so used to it that I actually called the next boyfriend (DH) Chris a couple of times......uh....didn't go over so well.....My dad still slips and calls DH Chris sometimes. I feel really awful when he does this.
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DH likes the names of one of his Exs.. but I already bashed that idea. Too many bad memories for me. There are also a few other ex "people" in his/our lives that the names would never even be an option. I think that its fine if it wasn't a big deal to either of you... but for me when I hear a certain few names it just sends chills up my spine.
Yes; Owen, Matthew, Michael, and Thomas are out for that reason.
Also Kathryn.