Well we had our meeting with our BM and her mom last night. They loved the spicy/cheesy chicken breast I cooked and mac & cheese and key lime pie. We had a good time just talking about every things and having fun. They said that they definitely wanted us to have the baby. So we were happy and content last night.
But this morning BM texted me asking me to come to her house. So I got ready and made my way over to her house. She asked me to sit down and she just broke down. On the way over a was preparing myself for the worst. She finally came out and said she had miscarried in the early hours in the morning. I was crushed. She was crushed. All she could say is that she was so sorry and that she had really wanted to do this for us. We both cried and I told her that it wasn't meant to be. She is only 17 and has so much life ahead of her and she didn't need to go through pregnancy. She just needed to be a normal teenage girl. She was only probably 2 and a half months along. Her mom said she had wished she told us. I told her I said no. I'm glad that she called and glad that we were able to become friends and experience this together. Yes, it really sucks for us and knowing that our baby will no longer be here is 2011 is hard. I'm still taking it in and trying to think.
I called and left a message with our new agency to call me back. Gotta tell her what happened. But we still want to get things going with them rather then the other agency that was taking forever. The good side to losing the baby is that we will now get to save more to put towards it that we wouldn't have had. Our young lady will now get to finish growing up and not have to stress about the baby and the BF and all that crap. She can go off like she planned and go into the military and all that jazz. I will never get the little time together that we did and all the talking and texting and messaging we did. I'm pretty sure she will be my friend for life. She is a great girl and her mother is such a sweet lady. I'm not really sure what else to say or do. I guess just hope and continue to pray for our child to enter our lives soon. I could really use a miracle right now.
Thanks to all of you for your support and kindness and help on this little short roller coaster. I'm gonna try to move on and look forward to each and every day and try not to take things for granted. Every day is a gift! Every person is your life is a gift! Love like there is no tomorrow!!