Reassurance, please?

I feel like my life is falling apart. 

DH has been miserable at work, which is carrying over to every part of his life.  He has been incredibly self-absorbed for months (his words, not mine) and has not been very helpful with DD.  Honestly, he has pretty much just been a jerk. 

DD has been insanely challenging.  She is very clingy and fusses whenever I put her down.  My mom is scared to take care of her without me around and DH still doesn't know what to do with her.  I desperately need a break, but don't feel very relaxed when the two best candidates to watch her don't want to watch her unless I am there (which really means that I am taking care of her and they are watching me.)  I'm getting random harassment about weaning DD, holding her too much, spoiling her, etc...

My house is a pigsty.  The dishes need to be done, toys picked up, the floors swept, all of the junk needs to be put away.  It is not a relaxing place for me and feels like a very chaotic, disorganized place for DD.  I feel like the mess is getting in the way of her being able to get off my lap and just play.

DH and I have realized that unless we can get our debts significantly paid down in the next year and a half he is either going to be trapped in his miserable job or we will have to sell the house.  We own the property with my mom (we own about 80%, she owns about 20%) and it can't be subdivided, so basically we would be uprooting her and making her start all over, too.

I feel like this is really rambly and should probably be about six different posts, but I just don't have the energy or organization to do even that.  (And now my phone is ringing and I can't answer it because DD is napping in my lap!)

I feel like I am under so much stress that I am about to crack.  Something needs to give.  Does anyone have any reassurance that everything is going to be okay?  Any advice?