Does the fear ever go away?

hilanic · September 2010

Does the fear that your baby will die in his sleep ever go away? My LO took a three hour nap today and I started worrying! I crept up to our room to peek at him and I was scared that he wouldn't be alive!

He is getting over a double ear infection and a throat infection so has been sleeping poorly at night but taking longer naps. So it just seems weird for him to sleep so long at nap time.

I guess this is a rhetorical question. Just throwing out my fear and thoughts of today.

electricdoctor83 · September 2010

My fear hasn't went away, but it is less now as he gets older. The other day he took a really long nap and I came in to check on him. He was in a really weird position and I felt his back...nothing....then I pulled on one of his legs and pulled him a few inches across the crib....nothing....he even felt cool to the touch. I had a freaking heart attack and snatched him up only to wake him up screaming since he thought somebody was trying to kill him.

I really thought he was dead. I don't think the fear will every go away until he's much much older, especially after that experience mentioned above.

kiwi443 · September 2010

Your son looks so thoughtful on that picture . I hope he feels better soon!

I still check on J if he naps longer than 2 1/2 hours, although I don't feel that same gut-wrenching fear that I did the first few months.

MrsBatty · September 2010

I still worry ... and I doubt if it will ever go away.

Temp159135562506975 · September 2010

that is why i LOVE the angelcare monitors- i have never had that fear going into their bedrooms - esp when they sleep late- i don't have to check on them (and risk waking them up).... angelcare = best thing ever.

but the fear is always there that something bad will happen to them - i doubt it ever goes away.

AJBMD915 · September 2010

It has definitely lessened for me. The first time DD STTN in her own bed around 18 mos, I also STTN unknowingly. When I woke up and realized that she hadn't either, I rushed to her room to make sure she was ok.

Occasionally if she takes a longer than normal nap, I still go up and check on her, put my hand on her chest to make sure she's still breathing.

sunnyday016 · September 2010

The fear has lessened, but it's still there. She's developed a habit of sleeping with her blankie up by her face for comfort. She likes it touching her cheek. A few times I've gone in there and her blanket is completely covering her head! Scared the crap out of me, but she didn't even wake up when I pull it down.

CeltiCutie · September 2010

it has lessened but it's definitely still there. I think it's part of motherhood.

bim38106 · September 2010

Less, but still there. Not so much for SIDS, but a mom in my mom's group lost her 2.5yo due to strangulation in his sleep (window blind cords). I don't worry about that, but just the fact that it happens makes me feel like anything could...I worry that maybe DD1 sneaked something small in her room and choked, or maybe she got stuck in her blankets and pillow and something happened, etc...

I think there will always be something to worry about...but the sleep thing is so instilled in us from SIDS that even now that DD1 is 2.5, I still do worry. Oddly though, I worry less about DD2 and SIDS.

hilanic · September 2010

kiwi443:

Your son looks so thoughtful on that picture . I hope he feels better soon!

I still check on J if he naps longer than 2 1/2 hours, although I don't feel that same gut-wrenching fear that I did the first few months.

Thanks, he is feeling better, still just a little extra clingy. That pic was from his birthday party and it was just one of those days when nothing really goes right. He got sick the day before so didn't feel much like smiling for his party. And he is normally such a smiley little guy.

hilanic · September 2010

sunnyday016:
The fear has lessened, but it's still there. She's developed a habit of sleeping with her blankie up by her face for comfort. She likes it touching her cheek. A few times I've gone in there and her blanket is completely covering her head! Scared the crap out of me, but she didn't even wake up when I pull it down.

This is what my son does too. He loves to snuggle with blankets and have them up by his face.

hilanic · September 2010

CeltiCutie:
it has lessened but it's definitely still there. I think it's part of motherhood.

This is what I think as well. I thought I could never love someone more than my husband...then my son came along! It is simply amazing, this love. Really can't describe it. So I think it is just motherhood and will always be there to some extent.

Cityplanner · September 2010

I am quite certain I am going to wake up in a panic and worry about her when she's out of the house and in a college dorm room. I think it's just the way being a mom goes.

pink.dutch.tulips · September 2010

i never had a fear that dd would die in her sleep, never afraid of sids either .. not so much 'it won't happen to MY kid' but more like 'i've taken all of the precautions and it's out of my control' ..

i LOVE her 3 hr naps when she does that - either she's teething or sick. i'll check in on her but if she needs her sleep, she needs her sleep and i'll leave her alone.

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