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Attachment Parenting
anna7602
member
The "point" of traveling with kids...
anna7602
member
This is a semi-vent that I have nowhere else to go with. I have to step back and recognize that I get easily irked by people who regularly get time away overnight from their kids (since I don't, ever), but really, when they throw in a comment like "what's the point of traveling with kids anyway? They're not going to remember." Wow, well then what's the point of anything you do during their childhood?
I get that not everyone can afford to travel, but when you're talking about going away internationally for a week (kid-less), I don't think that's what the conversation is about.
Ok, I need to step away from the computer and go to sleep. I am too tired and sensitive right now.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: The "point" of traveling with kids...
Yikes. This seems to be getting ugly . . .
However, I was thinking about this as I was in the seventh level of toddler travel hell yesterday (still wouldn't have done it any other way but I was having a moment). The biggest part of these experiences is language exposure. Over 4 days M was exposed to words we rarely use around the house (life preserver, wings, gate, terminal, ticket). He took in everything he experienced this weekend and will use it as a building block for his next encounter with an airport. After 12-20 lifetime exposures, he'll begin to understand and use the vocabulary properly increasing his abilities to later read and communicate. He was also exposed to different accents, a different climate (hello humidity!) and million different smells and sounds we just don't have here.
I taught on a rural island where most of my kids had never been off island. Many of their parents had but kids were rarely taken along. Trains, elevators, grocery carts, buses etc. were missing in their "cultural capital" so even real life stories were confused with fantasy for them.
Those synapses fire soooo early it'd be a shame to think there's no point in the gradual building of experiences. I definitely get why people don't always travel with kids but it seems a slippery slope if you stop doing things with children when you as an adult don't believe there's a "point".
This is exactly what I think incensed me so much about the comment. Thanks for articulating it better than I did.
i'd always been bothered by that "what's the point..." attitude too, but couldn't put my finger on why. well said (both of you!).
Amen Sister.
We have been on 6-7 long weekend vacations with DD since she was born (about 2 years ago). And they have been with her because she is part of our family and we want to take her on vacation with us!!
We have loved our family vacations. They are completely different (COMPLETELY) from what they were pre-DD. And in a different way, they are completely awesome, fun and memorable.
We love that we have a new person to explore this world with. While we are planning an overnight camping trip this weekend sans DD (first time!!), I can say that taking her on trips with us, during the first few years of her life, has been one of the most fun parenting experiences we have had.
And I love that she is growing up with traveling being a normal part of life
I agree, preach it! lol
We have not had the opportunity to travel with DD yet but I'm sure we will before she's at an age that she will remember. That's ok, she will learn while we're there and it's building a foundation for further learning. Also, years down the road she'll be able to see the pictures and know that we took her along because she's a part of our life and we want to live it WITH her, and we wanted to give her a new experience.
Honestly, I am super excited to travel with DS LATER ON, but for me there would be absolutely no point of travelling with him right now. He is such a hyperactive handful that it would just be more work. And I can NOT relax at home, for free
ETA: I would never go away and leave him, though. Not until he was at least school-aged, and maybe not even then.
I don't understand the logic of kids not remembering. Some people have memories much younger than others.
I think it's important to incorporate kids into your lifestyle, it may not be convenient all the time, but I want my kids to feel comfortable in being exposed to all sorts of situations and environments. It also gives me practice handling new situations w/DD.
TTC #1 Cycle 14 - IUI#1=BFN, IUI#2=BFP | TTC #2 Cycle 8=BFP!!
I agree with this. It's way hard to travel with K and while we do it from time to time, we also like to go away without her. I think that time with DH is as important as exposing my 19 month old to an airport. I can't wait to take her cool places that she'll remember and love...but not yet.
This is a great topic!
We got married/had babies younger than most of my friends. They were taking trips to Europe, and I said, "I would rather go to Europe with my kids." My parents never took me, and for me, it will likely be a once in a lifetime trip. I would like to make my family (which was just a thought back then) part of it.
And to the pp who mentioned travelling to places other than Western Europe, we travelled to the Caribbean instead of Europe
We had two trips where my dad would send us anywhere in the world on his miles, and we decided to go to the beach. lol I think the experience was equally intellectual as any trip to Europe would have been (I learned about local economies, wildlife, ocean life, local culture, etc. instead of the European stuff). And I got to sit on the beach a lot.
We've travelled several times with DS, but all of our plane trips have been to visit family. DS loves travelling. If we had the money and available vacation time, we would take him to visit all kinds of places with us.
We have always traveled a lot and knew having a child wouldn't stop this. My son was born in another country and while we live in the US now one of his sets of grandparents live overseas, and we go to see them a couple times a year. He has flown more internationally than many of my friend.
Saying that, we also travel without him. We spent 2 weeks in Asia in May without him, and it would have been a waste of money to take him with us. It was hot, crowded and it would have been hard traveling with him for 24 hours on a plane. I don't regret not taking him. I grew up seeing the world and will do the same for him, but my parents took trips without us and we do the same. I think it is healthy for your marriage as well.
I'm not debating the value of taking a vacation without kids in and of itself, although I did admit in my post that I'm particularly sensitive about the topic b/c this just isn't a possibility for us. It's the "they won't remember" reasoning that really got to me, as well as the really smug "trust me I know about these things" delivery.
I don't think that not wanting to travel with your kids makes you a bad parent! Frankly, it's nowhere near as relaxing for the parents and often the kid gets stressed from being off schedule.
We are taking my son on a cruise in December but only because grandparents are coming along to help look after him so that my husband and I get some time for ourselves. Otherwise, I'd much rather leave him at home. He'll enjoy a week or two with Grandma and Mommy and Daddy get a chance to recharge and be husband and wife, not just parents.
We've left him for weekend trips before several times and we have a 2 week cruise booked just before he turns 2 years old and we'll be leaving him with Grandma. I am not really looking forward as much to the December trip as I normally do- guess we'll see how it goes.