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special needs

am369am369
in Attachment Parenting

ruined my plan for AP.  I'm finally just starting to be able to enjoy my baby and love on him as I had hoped.

And I'm so sick of his therapist.  He told me I should never pick up a screaming baby.  I should pat him and calm him down then pick him up.  He should not be rewarded for screaming, and he has told me this for a long time. 

Uhm?  I'll pick up my screaming baby all I want, TYVM.  Seriously? 

And I figured out my Beco problem.  Since DS is so stiff I have to bounce him down to the bottom so that his feet hang out,  otherwise they sit in the waistband.

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Re: special needs

  • NeenTheBeanNeenTheBean
    I'm sorry your therapist is not very supportive. Is there any way you could switch to someone else? I know how hard it is to find therapists or switch. *hugs*
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  • Tonya_GTonya_G member
    I'm not sure of the back story and what your LO is getting therapy for, but that is some effing crazy advice. If I tried to just "pat LO's back and calm her down" rather than pick her up at 3 months of age, she would have screamed and cried harder and harder, wondering why I was standing right next to her and not picking her up! Some people don't think...
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  • am369am369

    imageTonya_G:
    I'm not sure of the back story and what your LO is getting therapy for, but that is some effing crazy advice. If I tried to just "pat LO's back and calm her down" rather than pick her up at 3 months of age, she would have screamed and cried harder and harder, wondering why I was standing right next to her and not picking her up! Some people don't think...

    DS is extremeley stiff, he has severe hypertonia.  Unfortunately I can't switch therapists because it's the free county program from birth to 3 and they only have one. 

    And DS cries all the time.  literally.  If I waited for him to calm down I'd be waiting for him to fall asleep.

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  • am369am369

    imageNeenTheBean:
    I'm sorry your therapist is not very supportive. Is there any way you could switch to someone else? I know how hard it is to find therapists or switch. *hugs*

    unfortunately it's the county's free birth to 3 program and he's the only one.  Next time he tells me I'm going to have to be even more assertive. 

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  • anabell0920anabell0920 member
    I would tell him you appreciate all his help but you don't need parenting advice! You do what you feel is right for him and tensing to his cries especially at only 3 months is not a bad thing.
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  • Tonya_GTonya_G member
    imageam369:

    imageTonya_G:
    I'm not sure of the back story and what your LO is getting therapy for, but that is some effing crazy advice. If I tried to just "pat LO's back and calm her down" rather than pick her up at 3 months of age, she would have screamed and cried harder and harder, wondering why I was standing right next to her and not picking her up! Some people don't think...

    DS is extremeley stiff, he has severe hypertonia.  Unfortunately I can't switch therapists because it's the free county program from birth to 3 and they only have one. 

    And DS cries all the time.  literally.  If I waited for him to calm down I'd be waiting for him to fall asleep.

    Ah. Well, then, another thought on this- wouldn't letting a baby cry cause them to feel tension, which would then in turn, create tension in their body... and if you have a baby who is already stiff... seems rather counterintuitive to let them cry, when one would think picking them up would help them to mentally relax, which would in turn, cause less physical tension. No?

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  • anna7602anna7602 member
    Hugs to you. I'm sorry your therapist is a jerk. Hopefully, he's better at what he was trained to do.
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  • 3boysmama3boysmama

    I'm sorry you are having a rough time.  My 12 year old has special needs and when he was a baby the therapists were so important to us.  We were fortunate and loved almost all of them...there was one however who we just didn't click with.  I know how hard it makes things.

    My son had mixed hyper/hypotonia...talk about confusing :)  He also was quite the screamer!

    Hugs to you!

    Kristen

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