I started our process not in favor of facilitators. That said, and after a twenty month wait with a traditional program, I see that they have a place. At month nineteen, we grew weary and starting working with facilitators. Within six or seven weeks, we matched with two birthmoms!The downside is that it is an additional expense. I found several that had no or very low sign-up fees (no more than $250). But the match fees range from 1500-5000.
The reason that I was not originally in favor of using facilitators was because an agency told me that facilitators tend to "lie about situations" and often only have really difficult to place situations (alcohol and drug use in excess). I found this not to be true- it seems that there are lawyers and small agencies that rely on these facilitators to get PAPs to present to birth moms. I also liked that we saw info about birth moms before we were presented. It allowed DH and I to have more discussion about our comfort level with certain lifestyles.
Aside from the $$$, the down side for me is that the emotional expense of knowing the details was hard. It made it all seem more real.
I was going to ask the same question! Silliestbunny, Are you going through your agency you were using for finalization or just hiring an attorney? We have found a facilitator who has lots of situations with a lower match fee, however, I'm not really sure what we would do if we were matched!!!!