Random Vent: Greedy People
becki777
member
I'm chatting with a friend on Facebook and the entire conversation just annoys me! She is Xmas shopping for her 9 year old, and buying her an Ipod Touch AND a Nintendo DSI. (She already has the regular Nintendo DS) Her DD just got a brand new laptop for doing well on her report card last year. Their family has a Wii, Xbox 360 and a PS3. Now she is going on about how she wants to get the new motion thingy for the PS3. They are building a new home and buying flat screen TVs for her 9 year old and 4 year old bedrooms.
I just don't get why you need that many toys & material things in your home. Those are not the toys that kids actually learn from, and they get old so fast. I personally think that children who get that much STUFF will not learn the value of money or really appreciate what they have. If you have the money to buy nice things, that is fine but I still think moderation is important.
WDYT?
Caleb is 3!
101 in 1001
Re: Random Vent: Greedy People
I agree, it seems over the top.
My husband and I have already talked about Christmas/birthdays and not going crazy with gifts.
We will do 3 gifts for each child on christmas, and then stockings from Santa.
I am sure the grandparents will fill in the blanks and give more than they could ever need/want.
I'm in total agreement with you. I'd be interested to know why your friend is buying all of those things. Does she want her child to have them? Do the daughter's friends have these things, so your friend is buying them in order for her daughter to fit in?
Everyone is waaaaay to concerned with keeping up with the Joneses these days. My brother's wife is, and it's putting them in serious debt.
Yeah, it does seem like a lot. I mean, DH and I are bad about wanting the "latest and greatest" but we often pass the old down to family members that want or need it.
With kids it's completely different, though. I love (love, love!) that my parents have decided that they will only buy the classic, non-animated/noise-making toys for their grandchildren. They've done some reading and figured out that when children have toys that do all the playing for them, it leaves no time for the child's imagination. However, when they have to invent games to play with their toys, they really learn how to entertain themselves with just about anything. I agree 100% and while we do have some talking/noisy toys for Francesca, they're Leap Frog and Vtech with some basic learning skills involved.
I guess as long as this friend and her husband have money "like that," they can get what they want for their children but I totally agree. Their minds will be mush by the time they're in school. No 4 yr old needs a flat screen TV in her room....or any other sort of TV.
Greedy seems a bit harsh. If they have the money to buy all the latest electronic toys they want, all the power to them. Greedy to me implies they're taking things from others and not sharing, etc. It bit more mean spirited than just wanting the latest tech toys. I don't see anything wrong with a 9 yr old having a laptop -- kids start off working on computers at a young age nowadays. While I don't think kids need TVs in their room, I don't see a problem with them buying a new home and flat screen TVs if they can afford it. Does her DH play on the Wii, XBox, PS3 etc.? These might not just be toys for their kids. My DH is big into electronics and we have a Wii, XBox 360 and PS3 (plus all the older versions in storage) because this is his thing. I can't imagine letting the girls spend hours playing computer games everyday but at 9 yr. old, there are a lot of educational games you can get. I think they can be utilized as another way to learn -- and like many parenting choices, it comes down to moderation. Everything is relative. I don't think because they buy their children electronic items means they're not teaching them the value of money. You can learn that in many ways; they may have just chosen to not focus on it when it comes to buying electronic items around the house.
I guess I'm kinda thrown by why you think it's greedy that they want to buy electronic items, a new home and flat screen TVs. Some people put their money towards cars, others vacations, others for savings.
People (kids included) are motivated by different things. As a child I was very money motivated and that has not changed.
That motivation helped to make me a very successful student as well as adult.
Some people would argue that is a bad thing but to each their own. FWIW, I don't think the family you mentioned is being greedy at all. If they have the money they can buy whatever they want.
And who is to say they aren't donating an equal amount to the charity of their choice on the flip side?
I'd say it's more overindulgence than greed, from how your describe it. I'm of the general opinion that overindulging your child, both with "things" and with lack of behavioral boundaries, sets them up for failure and feelings of entitlement later in life.
That being said, I grew up not wanting for much. I was pretty spoiled, if we're being honest. My parents bought us more gifts than they could probably afford. But they also raised us to be appreciative, and understand that you don't always get everything you want. So, I guess it really depends...
I think the term you are looking for might be more "materialistic" than greedy. I feel similar to you... I don't care about video games, flat screen tvs, or the latest and greatest of most things. When I shop, I try to get quality things, but we don't spend a lot of money on things like that. I would prefer for my children not to have TVs in their rooms and I hope we can avoid that for a loooong time.
I also agree with the PPs that it's sort of a "to each their own" situation. My mom is kind of materialistic. My parents have 3 large flat-screen TVs in a small house. They also pay for satellite for all 3 of those TVs, and each TV has a blu ray player. But, it's not my money, so I don't say anything. They haven't asked me for my opinion, you know?
All we can do is try to do the best for our families and not worry about anyone else, as long as they aren't hurting their kids. But, I totally get what you're saying.
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I agree with this. My sisters kids are not "spoiled" she is divorced so between homes and my parents, their dads parents, and step moms parents, they get a lot of stuff, last Xmas I didn't think my 5 year old niece should have gotten a $100 Nintendo DS, but my mom got her one, and they each have one at their dads house as well. I think people should know their limits, esp with kids. I don't see it as greed, like Hughes said I see it as overindulgence. Nice things for your home is ok as long as you can afford it and getting your kids what they want or need or as a special gift is OK as long as you raise them to appreciate it. I don't see my sisters kids appreciating their things and that is what makes me mad when I see them getting stuff like that (like my parent's giving them a TV to sit at their breakfast table, give me a break)!!.
I was struggling coming up with the right word, overindulgent is the perfect one. I think what bugs me the most about it is the constant talk about it. Every time I see her she is talking about material possessions. She thinks that the cool toys are what is the most important.
Her 9 year old has told me time and time again that she doesn't play the video game systems, and she wishes her parents would spend more time playing with her. =(