TTC After a Loss 6 Months+

Just sent my picture in to I Am The Face

I really really love the idea of showing all the faces of stillbirth, miscarriage and infant loss and I wanted to share in case anyone here wants to participate. 

The idea is 2,000 women lose a baby every day in the US alone. Their goal is to put a face to that 2,000 (get 2,000 people to upload a picture of themselves) to try and take away the "taboo" from MC/PL. They have facebook badges and sample status messages for facebook and twitter to use on October 15th. Just thought I'd share. I recently stopped being so secretive about my sadness over my loss and started talking about it and my infertility and that has really helped me.

www.iamtheface.org

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Re: Just sent my picture in to I Am The Face

  • I'm going to do this too. And while I like the idea of the pic/status on October 15, I'm having a hard time wanting to do it. While I have no problem coming clean about my losses when it naturally comes up in conversation, I have coworkers and others who have no idea and with whom the conversation would never come up and it just seems awkward...
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  • imageColindaP:
    I'm going to do this too. And while I like the idea of the pic/status on October 15, I'm having a hard time wanting to do it. While I have no problem coming clean about my losses when it naturally comes up in conversation, I have coworkers and others who have no idea and with whom the conversation would never come up and it just seems awkward...

    That's understandable. I don't think anyone should do anything that makes them feel uncomfortable.  They do have badges that say "supporter" instead of "I am 1 in 4" if you wanted to do that instead which I think is pretty cool. I am going to ask my close friends to change their photo on 10/15 to a supporter badge for me.

    they are here:

     https://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=24610&id=128929057151139

    I think I am going to do the video too. You  take a video of yourself saying "I am the face of (miscarriage, stillbirth, infant loss, etc.) and send it in. They are going to make one big video out of all the submissions. The whole thing is pretty awesome to me.

     

     

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  • I've been planning to do this too. While it sucks we even have to do it, the idea is great. It sucks to feel like loss is a stigma we can't talk about.
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  • imageColindaP:
    I'm going to do this too. And while I like the idea of the pic/status on October 15, I'm having a hard time wanting to do it. While I have no problem coming clean about my losses when it naturally comes up in conversation, I have coworkers and others who have no idea and with whom the conversation would never come up and it just seems awkward...

    This is exactly how I feel!  I may or may not do an update Oct. 15th. 

    I will send my picture in, though, great idea!

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  • Heres my deal. Most of my closest friends and family know of our two losses, but I never came out on facebook about either pregnancy, for many reasons.

    I do want to say something, because I am not ashamed and I am happy to talk about my losses, in fact I feel better each time I talk about it. But, I am afraid of just putting it out there and what the reaction will be. I would hate for people to think I was being an AW or trying to elicit sympathy. The last thing I want is peoples pity or fake sympathy from people I know couldn't give a crap. However, I also feel like I am hiding the fact that I am a Mum an I don't get to talk openly of my son, and I hate that too.

    So I am on the fence, and I flip-flop.

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  • imagejennsadye1979:

    Heres my deal. Most of my closest friends and family know of our two losses, but I never came out on facebook about either pregnancy, for many reasons.

    I do want to say something, because I am not ashamed and I am happy to talk about my losses, in fact I feel better each time I talk about it. But, I am afraid of just putting it out there and what the reaction will be. I would hate for people to think I was being an AW or trying to elicit sympathy. The last thing I want is peoples pity or fake sympathy from people I know couldn't give a crap. However, I also feel like I am hiding the fact that I am a Mum an I don't get to talk openly of my son, and I hate that too.

    So I am on the fence, and I flip-flop.

    I know how you feel Jenn. I kept very quiet for the longest time about my miscarriage and infertility and told the people that did know that I was fine and everything was all good. I just got sick of faking it. I sort of snapped one day and now I talk about it all the time. It is a very personal decision what you say and to who and you need to do what makes you feel comfortable. If you do want to say something on 10/15, I will be the first one on your facebook supporting you, just so you know. :) I will say that being open about it has been very freeing for me. 

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  • imageBabyMimi:
    imagejennsadye1979:

    Heres my deal. Most of my closest friends and family know of our two losses, but I never came out on facebook about either pregnancy, for many reasons.

    I do want to say something, because I am not ashamed and I am happy to talk about my losses, in fact I feel better each time I talk about it. But, I am afraid of just putting it out there and what the reaction will be. I would hate for people to think I was being an AW or trying to elicit sympathy. The last thing I want is peoples pity or fake sympathy from people I know couldn't give a crap. However, I also feel like I am hiding the fact that I am a Mum an I don't get to talk openly of my son, and I hate that too.

    So I am on the fence, and I flip-flop.

    I know how you feel Jenn. I kept very quiet for the longest time about my miscarriage and infertility and told the people that did know that I was fine and everything was all good. I just got sick of faking it. I sort of snapped one day and now I talk about it all the time. It is a very personal decision what you say and to who and you need to do what makes you feel comfortable. If you do want to say something on 10/15, I will be the first one on your facebook supporting you, just so you know. :) I will say that being open about it has been very freeing for me. 

    Thanks dear, I will absolutely support you 100% on October 15th, not matter what I do. :)

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  • jenn - I'm pretty sure I'd have fewer hesitations if I'd had a stillbirth or late loss. A pregnancy that everyone knew about, and a loss that was "real" to others, you know?
  • imageColindaP:
    jenn - I'm pretty sure I'd have fewer hesitations if I'd had a stillbirth or late loss. A pregnancy that everyone knew about, and a loss that was "real" to others, you know?

    See, this is what make me WANT to do it. Your loss is as real as mine, as everyone elses. 1 day pregnant or 41 weeks, a loss is a loss. And nobody should feel they have to hide it. I am sorry ((hugs))

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  • Thank you for sharing this.  I am going to do it.
  • imagejennsadye1979:

    imageColindaP:
    jenn - I'm pretty sure I'd have fewer hesitations if I'd had a stillbirth or late loss. A pregnancy that everyone knew about, and a loss that was "real" to others, you know?

    See, this is what make me WANT to do it. Your loss is as real as mine, as everyone elses. 1 day pregnant or 41 weeks, a loss is a loss. And nobody should feel they have to hide it. I am sorry ((hugs))

    I hear you cluckin' big chicken. I might do it and block coworkers from my wall, that's an option. 

  • Thank you for this website!  I'm thinking about "coming out" on 10/15, too.  
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  • I submitted my photo also. I have also been trying to get out info locally about the campaign to try and reach more people so the topic is less taboo.

    Jenn

    image 3 IUI's all BFN

    IVF#1 BFN IVF#2 BFP, loss at 19 weeks FET#1 BFN IVF#3 BFP, m/c FET#2 BFN

    Missing our twins Zachary and Madison, lost at 19 weeks on 11/13/09, edd 4/9/10

    BFP 7/17/10, m/c 7/25/10, edd 3/25/11

    Ectopic, lost left tube 4/20/11, edd 12/6/11

    my blog

  • imagebutterfly843:
    I submitted my photo also. I have also been trying to get out info locally about the campaign to try and reach more people so the topic is less taboo.

    That is what is most important to me also. I am tired of feeling like some sort of leper because I had a miscarriage and I am sick of people judging me for still being upset about it a year and a half later.

     My strategy is to bombard my facebook, twitter and blog with info, especially on Oct 15th.  I am going to ask all my friends and family to change their facebook photo that day to the I am the face supporter badge.

    It would be nice if the bump featured it in some way... 

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