- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Attachment Parenting
Tell me about Hug it Out
I think I saw this discussed here a few weeks ago.
We're having problems with nightwakings. I'm beginning to feel like it's not safe for me to drive to work in the morning because I'm so tired. We tried one of Ferber but I can't do that again, at least right now. So last night we relented and I picked her up and rocked her back to sleep one time and then DH brought her into our bed the second time. Big no nos! I want to respond to her but I don't want to teach her that all she needs to do to get into our bed is to cry.
She sleeps in a crib right by our bed.
What is hug it out? How does it work and does it work????
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Tell me about Hug it Out
I saw that you posted yesterday with regards to NCSS too. I would guess that she must be going through something since she has STTN before...Is there a particular reason that you don't want to bed share? I only ask this becuase for us DS starts the night out in his crib and comes to our bed when he wakes for his first feeding because that is what allows us as a family to get the most sleep. If she is waking up at 3am could you bedshare with her for the last 2 hours before you get up for work? I would guess that at some point if you stay consistent with putting her to bed in her crib she will STTN again.
I'm sorry that I don't know anything about "hug it out", but I really hope that you find something as a family that works for you...being exhausted at work and during your morning commute is no fun (not to mention unsafe). Good luck Mama!
HIO was kind of coined here and is really what you want to make of it. Some people find standing over the crib and hugging their standing baby has helped if the baby won't stay laying down. They baby eventually calms and will lay down. Others have tried continuously laying the baby down. Others have found that rubbing the baby's back is effective for them if they baby will stay laying down. A few people have found that their babies don't calm down if they remain in the room so HIO didn't work. Some have also tried staying in the room but not touching.
Some people have also found it took long periods of time crying before working (I believe MissEE, so sorry if I am inaccurate with this, set a limit of an hour of crying while HIO and did hit that hour more than once before it started to get easier). Basically it is CIO but without leaving the baby alone with whatever feelings you think your baby would have. There is usually crying involved but you are there to reassure them that though they are upset, it is okay.
Thanks for the advice, ladies. I'm nervous about her being in our bed. At what age is bedsharing less dangerous? I don't BF so I haven't been comfortable with bedsharing. She's 10 months now so is it safer for her to be in our bed? We have 3 cats who sleep with us and a pillowtop mattress and we're not set up to safely bedshare but we could make adjustments. I'm also nervous about her being able to explore in our bedroom and bathroom while we're sleeping.
I read your other post as well and just wanted to say that I know the Ferber book is heavy on the "sleep association" stuff and says that if LO doesn't fall asleep on his/her own it is a huge problem, but Dr. Sears doesn't really agree (see his Baby Book and/or Sleep Book). If rocking or bedsharing part of the night gets you all some sleep until this phase passes, I wouldn't stress about it.
That said, I have a DD who does not sleep well and I would throw a party if she only woke up at 3am. So maybe my advice is not worth much.
ETA: See this link regarding safe bedsharing.