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December 2010 Moms
Blondangel
member
"It's not all about you anymore!"
Blondangel
member
So this is what my H says to me after telling me that we're not doing anything at all for my birthday.
He doesn't want to spend any $ going out or buying a gift b/c we need thousands of dollars worth of stuff (including hospital delivery) for the baby. THEN, he informed me that he didn't want to get a birthday cake b/c he's trying to watch his weight. (He's gained 15 lbs since my BFP).
So, I was a little upset that my birthday was going to be just another day and nobody seems to care, when he said that it's not all about me anymore. Ummmm ok, I never really expected anything to be all about me, but now I feel like I just don't matter anymore. My 'rents and sister all moved out of state and don't keep in touch and my friends have pretty much abandoned me since the BFP. I just feel really bad like I don't matter anymore.
Well, that's my pity party. Thanks for listening. Anyone else felt like this?
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Re: "It's not all about you anymore!"
Totally lame. Throw yourself a party. lol
Reality is probably setting in for him... But just because you're having a baby doesn't mean your personal lives have to cease to exist.
On your birthday, it IS all about you! I know he's being careful with money, but there's a lot he can do without spending much. If he's worried about his weight, he doesn't have to eat cake!
Boo to your DH. I hope he's just planning something special and letting on like he's not!
This!
Granted, I stopped really caring about my b-day and haven't done any big celebrations for the past couple of years, but DH and I always do a little something like a nice dinner or cake. I don't even expect gifts any more... but that's because I want it that way, not because DH told me "it's not all about me any more."
...you're birthday is ALWAYS about you! I get that you're trying to save money but there are other things you can do for your birthday that don't cost a lot. My husband and I are so broke and our birthdays are 4 days apart in October...so we're not doing anything major, but we'll make dinner together and watch a movie or something.
You should tell him you're pissed and do something special for yourself if he doesn't.
My family still celebrates birthdays, whether or not you have a child. I really hate the idea that once you have a child you supposedly cannot do or buy anything anymore.
So many people have told me to "enjoy it while I can." Apparently, not only will I have a baby soon, I will be dead as well.
Pssh if my DH said that to me I'd make myself the most delicious looking cake and refuse to share with him.
I don't ever do anything for my birthday but I still celebrate in some way. You deserve cake, if you want it, or to do something special on your day. If he doesn't want to buy a gift then he could make you dinner or breakfast in bed!
Thanks, Ladies!
You know what? You guys are right. If he's gonna be lame, then there's no reason why I can't throw myself a "party". Maybe go to a movie or something. I like the idea of making my own cake and eating it slowly in front of him. -Oh what's that, Honey? You wanted some cake too? I'm sorry, you said you didn't want any. BWAHAHAHAHA!
You all had some good ideas and I'm still hoping he'll come around.
If my H told me that, I'd laugh in his face and probably kick the sh*t out of him.
No way would I let my H make me feel bad and not celebrate my brithday just because we are bringing a baby into the world.
My birthday was in August, and everyone made a big deal.
I agree with what other pps have said, buy yourself a cake and eat that sucker right in front of your H. Go out, and buy something small to make yourself feel pretty. Maybe a new tube of lipstick or something.
Tell your H to shove it as well!
That is ridiculous. While I understand maybe not buying as an expensive gift as you may have in the past or going out for dinner at a really fancy restaurant him refusing to celebrate it just seems lazy. There are a lot of ways to acknowledge someone?s birthday without spending loots of money. Plus the cake thing, if he is trying to watch his weight he can have a small piece and exercise afterwards. It?s not your fault he gained 15 pds.
I can understand if ya'll are trying to save money but he is being a poop head about not even getting a cake (hello don't eat any!!). I hope he is just kidding and will surprise you.
Happy early b-day!!
OP--I read your post to my DH last night and said that I would smack up upside the head if he tried that with my birthday. We're pretty into birthdays. We don't do a lot, but we do make it special and give presents, etc. Usually it's a nice dinner out and home made cake.
DH said (jokingly), I'll have to remember that for your birthday! I laughed and reminded him that his is in 10 days and I can gladly return his gift.
Really, you should get at least a small celebration for your birthday. Just because you are having a child doesn't mean you should stop celebrating the day YOU came into this world. Maybe being pg is an even better reason TO celebrate!