Babies: 6 - 9 Months

Should I call CPS?

My younger brother and his wife wanted to go to Vegas for a few days and they couldn't get anyone else to watch him so they left my nephew (13 months) with her mom.  She is literally on crack.  My mom went to check on him because she was worried about him.

So my mom gets there and is talking to her for a few minutes and says, "where is the baby?"  She says, "Oh he's in the bath."  Indifferent  My mom should have taken him then and I am so upset that she didn't, but luckily they are back and he is fine.  She also smoked the entire time she had him, didn't use a car seat, and who knows what else.

I am obviously going to talk to my brother but I can anticipate what he'll do and I am REALLY worried about my nephew's safety.  Can CPS do anything about this?  I'm just not sure because it wasn't the parents that did this.

Re: Should I call CPS?

  • You NEED to call CPS, RIGHT NOW
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  • I could be wrong but I think it'd come back on the parents for leaving the baby with the crackhead.

    ETA:  If your brother and his wife are normally good parents, I would have a serious talk with them about leaving their baby with her again before calling CPS. 

  • At least call you so you can get information. I am sure there is something you can do, or have your mom call since she is the one who witnessed everything. Poor baby.
  • If you ever have to ask yourself if you should call CPS, you should call CPS. It is anonymous, you explain what happened, and they decide to look into it or not. Just know that it could affect the custody of your nephew if they feel that his parents are putting him in danger. At least they would understand the severity of the issue.

     

    *I doubt they would lose custody, but just know that it is a possibility. 

    In our situation, if BM left the kids in a dangerous household, we would call CPS in a heartbeat and demand a temporary change of custody. I don't know how it would go down in your sitch.

  • I guess I don't understand what CPS will do at this point? Your mom should have taken him, IMO.
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  • I don't know what the point of calling now, after the fact, would be.  I suggest having a discussion with your brother about it and warning him that you have no problem calling CPS if he decides to put his baby at risk by leaving him with MIL again.  I am floored that your Mom saw that and decided to just leave the baby there.  Floored.
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  • Oh.My.Gosh. Why would they leave their child with a known crackhead when they obviously had other options? I would call your brother and tell him why you were concerned. I would also tell him that if they left him in her care again, I would be calling CPS. Who knows what crazy things that child saw when he was over there. Your brother and his wife seem like they are lacking even mediocre judgement. What if they leave the baby alone with her again?

  • If you are asking if you should call CPS then your gut tells you that you should.

    If your brother has no ability to think clearly and his baby momma is a crackhead then perhaps you can speak to CPS about having the baby placed with you until they get their crap together. When babies are removed from the home they try to place with family first before placing the child with a foster parent.

    Good luck.

  • imagesleepingbeauty825:
    I guess I don't understand what CPS will do at this point? Your mom should have taken him, IMO.

    I know what you mean.  I'm just worried that they will continue to let her watch him.

  • Thanks for the advice everyone.  I'm just sick thinking about this so it's hard to figure out the right thing to do.  I'm going to call my brother and let him know that I don't have a problem calling CPS if this happens again.
  • imageMegPie11:
    Thanks for the advice everyone.  I'm just sick thinking about this so it's hard to figure out the right thing to do.  I'm going to call my brother and let him know that I don't have a problem calling CPS if this happens again.

    Seriously, call them and explain what happened. They will let you know if any action can even be taken place. I called yesterday for an event that they told me was not something I should worry about unless it had other things that coincided with it.

    Calling =/= reporting

  • If you are so worried, why don't you or your mother go back there and get him?
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  • imageMelly Mel:
    If you are so worried, why don't you or your mother go back there and get him?

    He's not there anymore. 

  • imageMegPie11:
    Thanks for the advice everyone.  I'm just sick thinking about this so it's hard to figure out the right thing to do.  I'm going to call my brother and let him know that I don't have a problem calling CPS if this happens again.

    Look, the right thing to do is to protect the child. If your brother can't be a responsible parent then someone should. Too many variables about what can go wrong with the next what-if sitution. The crappy thing is you shouldn't have to explain to your brother what being a good parent is. He has a better parent in his Aunt than he does in his mom and dad. Step up and call.

  • I'm afraid that even if you talk to your brother about this he will do it again anyways.  He just won't tell you or your mom and will probably be defensive about it.  Were you or your mom asked to watch him?  Maybe tell your brother what happened without threatening or anything and say that you or your mom will always be available.   (If that is the case.)  I would still call about this so they can have it on record.  God forbid something did ever happen, you did what you could.

  • I used to work with child welfare, and I agree with everything that Shorty has previously stated.

    The main issue that I think child welfare would need to be made aware of is that you have reason to believe that the caregiver was actively using drugs while caring for the child, and that this endangered the child because he was left alone during bath-time. I know it's sucky, but CPS probably wouldn't become involved over the carseat or those sorts of issues.

    As Shorty previously mentioned, the referral will be open for your brother, not for the caregiver, which is just something to be aware of. 

  • imageberrysweet:

    I used to work with child welfare, and I agree with everything that Shorty has previously stated.

    The main issue that I think child welfare would need to be made aware of is that you have reason to believe that the caregiver was actively using drugs while caring for the child, and that this endangered the child because he was left alone during bath-time. I know it's sucky, but CPS probably wouldn't become involved over the carseat or those sorts of issues.

    As Shorty previously mentioned, the referral will be open for your brother, not for the caregiver, which is just something to be aware of. 

    Just wanted to point out that this SHOULD NOT be your reason for NOT calling. If you care about your nephew, call. You have to worry about him before you think about your brother's feelings. I am sure that will be hard, but if something were to happen in the future (God forbid), I would not want that "what if..." on my chest.

    Can you tell I am pro-calling? I would rather CPS be all "Why did you call us?" than me have the weight of something else... 

  • imageshortyred919:
    imageberrysweet:

    I used to work with child welfare, and I agree with everything that Shorty has previously stated.

    The main issue that I think child welfare would need to be made aware of is that you have reason to believe that the caregiver was actively using drugs while caring for the child, and that this endangered the child because he was left alone during bath-time. I know it's sucky, but CPS probably wouldn't become involved over the carseat or those sorts of issues.

    As Shorty previously mentioned, the referral will be open for your brother, not for the caregiver, which is just something to be aware of. 

    Just wanted to point out that this SHOULD NOT be your reason for NOT calling. If you care about your nephew, call. You have to worry about him before you think about your brother's feelings. I am sure that will be hard, but if something were to happen in the future (God forbid), I would not want that "what if..." on my chest.

    Can you tell I am pro-calling? I would rather CPS be all "Why did you call us?" than me have the weight of something else... 

    Once again, I agree. You NEED to call. Exposure to meth and crack (even just by being in the same house) can be very dangerous to babies, and can make them very, very ill. 

    Still, you just need to be prepared for the situation when (notice I didn't say "if") you call. 

  • Your brother/sil should have their baby taken away from them. How SELFISH to leave your child with a KNOWN crack addict... its not like the MIL just started doing all this over the weekend... they knowingly left their child with someone that was UNFIT to care for it so they could go to VEGAS?!?! OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    You don't think its their fault... um... THEY ARE THEIR CHILD"S ONLY ADVOCATE!!!!! Their baby did NOT choose to be left in that situation!!! Why couldn't you or your mom watch their baby if you knew they were leaving it in such horrible circumstances.?!

    #rainbows and #unicorns make any situation #cute. keithcorcoran
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  • Yes, at least to have it on file. Who cares about what everyone else feels, do what's right and call. CPS will figure it out and act if they need to. You have to think about how would you feel if something did happen and you didn't call.
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  • Why in the world would they leave him with her if they know she is a drug addict?  Couldn't anyone else watch him?  Was their trip to Vegas that important?  Good lord, now I'm p!ssed.  That is just wrong. 

    I would absolutely  call without the slightest bit of guilt.  It is a miracle that he it OK.  If his parents can't be an advocate for him, then that falls on you. It sucks that you are saddled with it, but if they don't have the common sense to make sure he is safe and well cared for instead of running around Las Vegas, then something needs to happen. 

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