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Attachment Parenting
lvisser
member
RE: Africa.
lvisser
member
My DH just spent 12 days in Africa (well, actually in the COUNTRY of Mozambique... Africa is not a country)....
Do you know who takes care of the babies of the village? THE CHILDREN. He saw 3 years olds wearing their siblings. He fell in love with a small lil girl there.... he would hold her hand, but as soon as her sibling started crying, he would have to let go of her hand, cause her responsibilty was to tend to her siblings. When the nursing babies were hungry, they would find the mother, and have them nursed, and then be right back taking care of them.
He never even SAW any of the mothers. They woke up, and got to work. The children were responsible for eating, and keeping themselves busy. All.Day.Long.
So.... yeah. Get off your damn high horse ladies. Thx.
Rylee - 3.28.08
Malakai - 8.3.09
Ezra - 12.1.11 ASD
Malakai - 8.3.09
Ezra - 12.1.11 ASD
This discussion has been closed.
Re: RE: Africa.
So you come here to start sh!t, and we're the ones on high horses? And because ONE article from a woman's personal experiences regarding African culture and parenting was posted/discussed, you think we automatically assume that all Africans are the best moms ever?
With the exception of a couple of posters, we don't try and push our ways onto others, or say that the way we parent is the best/only way. But thank you for coming and attacking our board.
To be honest this topic is getting out of hand. Africa is just like any other place in the world. There are babies that don't cry and have the parents wear them, then there are the babies that have to be cared for by 3 year olds. In America, there are babies that go to day care, and there are babies that stay at home. Either way, judging one's parent style is wrong. Period.
No, thats true... I also posted it in her post as well. I'm just saying, don't assume that the parents are doing all the work over there... OR BFing/Wearing their babies 24/7 because from [from DH's] POV that is NOT what it is like.
Sorry... just a touchy subject since its all I've heard about since DH got home.
Malakai - 8.3.09
Ezra - 12.1.11 ASD
Thank you!! Very well said.
I am pretty sure we are all intelligent enough to know that not ALL of Africa is like this. It was coming from one person's perspective of what she went through. If you felt the need to explain how your husband's trip was and how it differed from the article that's fine and dandy but telling us to "Get off your d*mn high horses" didn't really need to be added.
As you pointed out, Africa is a continent, and a big one, at that. I'm pretty sure your DH didn't see the entire place in 12 days.
I don't think his word is any more final on how "African mothers" parent than the author of the article in the OP. And I'll go out on a limb and say that while Americans might take a lesson from some of the parenting methods used in Kenya, it's not realistic to assume that they're the best choice for moms in the U.S.
Since you brought this here, I'll RP my response to you from 0-3:
*****************************
OK, but that's, you know, Mozambique...which as you pointed out, is not the whole of Africa.
The article is about Kenya specifically, where my mom lived for several years. My mother is extremely non-AP (and is a bit scandalized that I'm still nursing my 1 year old) except for babywearing, because she saw it all the time there and confirms that worn babies there really do not cry.
And this is not the reason that the OP should get off her high horse, really.Malakai - 8.3.09
Ezra - 12.1.11 ASD
Thanks. We agree that the poster on 0-3 was out of line, and I really did appreciate the story about your husband's experience. The high horse comment is what upset us.
Oh, I'm sure African children act the same way. Kids are kids
Did you recently discover that Mozambique is a country in southern Africa, and Africa is not a country?
I was just lurking here out of curiosity. Having spent a significant amount of time in Kenya, Uganda, and Zimbabwe, I can say that your the conclusion you have drawn from your 12-day short visit to a village in Mozambique was rather odd. Generalizations are always ignorant and foolish, and you clearly have a hostile agenda. While it is common for children in very rural areas to help a lot with the care of their siblings, I have never observed mothers being absent in the manner you have described. It was very common to see mothers work and do domestic chores with their content babies on their backs. Most intelligent people understand that there is no such thing as perfect parenting anywhere on the planet.
I must say, that your post lacks credibility and the way you ended your post shows bitterness. You wouldn't even feel the need to do this if you were happy with your choices as a mother.