Ugh, back to the beginning with STTN

lola808 · September 2010

If your baby wakes up during the night and he/she is learning to or already STTN, what do you do?

A was doing really well for a bit, going down in his crib between 6 and 7 pm, dream feeding around 11 pm, then waking the next morning between 5 and 6 am. Recently, though, he's back to waking up throughout the night.

I feel like I'm being inconsistent in my responses (e.g., nursing, patting, paci, letting him cry a bit) because he's persisting much more than he did the first time around. What to do?!

mie · September 2010

It depends. I try to see if she will settle on her own so I don't rush to get her, but if she continues to cry I get up and try to soothe her back to sleep. I will say that months 8-11 were torture because she would wake often and it took forever to get her back to sleep. CIO was never an option b/c she is stubborn and will actually sit up while crying and will fall asleep sitting up so each time she did that she'd jerk her head and would wake up and continue crying. Hope your DS gets back to STTN.

MrsZiz · September 2010

I was like this with Bella too, completely inconsistent in what I did. She woke up through the night until just a few months ago. At that point I decided that I needed to make the decision on what to do and stick with it. I cut out the night feeding and let her fuss. The first night, she cried, she wanted to nurse and she was DEMANDING to nurse. Ryan went in, changed her diaper, cuddled her for just a few mins and put her back to bed. She continued to fuss and it lasted about 15 mins. The next night she woke up crying again at the SAME time, so we let her fuss, it was less than the first night and she went back to bed on her own. The third night same thing, same time, she fussed even less than night two and was back to sleep on her own. Night 4 she STTN.

Now she'll wake up once in awhile but after a couple of seconds of talking to herself or trying to find one of the MANY little animals in her crib, she's back to bed on her own.

Your LO is still small yet so maybe he's going through a developmental milestone that causing him to wake or a growth spurt.

Married2MrWright · September 2010

Perhaps he's having a growth spurt, reaching a developmental milestone and/or teething? All of those could certainly lead to more night wakings. Personally (and I know this is in direct opposition of some of the other mamas on this board) I don't think expecting a baby under the age of 2 to sleep more than 5-6 hours at a stretch, for the majority of the time and consistently, is reasonable. FWIW, I think there is a good reason that STTN is officially defined as 5-6 hours of untinterrupted sleep (not 8-10-12 as most parents think or desire). In that case, your baby is STTN, even with the one night waking.

There will be times when they will and times when they won't...I guess my point is that it's mutable depending upon the situation. If you happen to have a baby who will sleep longer than 5-6 hours at a time, then great, but I think parents worry way too much about trying to get baby to sleep for 8-10-12 hours at a stretch.

I am a fan of meeting your baby's needs, whatever that may be...so right now, it sounds like he may need you during the night than previously...patting, nursing, comforting are great choices, especially if they're working to meet his needs and settle him back to sleep. If you were patting and that wasn't working then I'd say, try something else. If he needs to cry (which again, I personally don't believe that babies need to cry to fall asleep...but if they need to cry to release their pent up energy, frustration, etc......certainly not alone or for an extended period of time with no comfort...) then letting him fuss/cry for a short period of time may be appropriate, if that is the reason he's awake.

Whenever I find myself frustrated with my LO's sleep (or lack thereof) I try to remind myself that this is temporary and part of parenting an infant. It helps me to be more calm about it and less frantic about trying to "get her to sleep"...9 times out of 10, once I calm down she actually does go back to sleep much more readily than if I am irritated and frantic myself.

I recommend "The No Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley for sleep questions and issues. You can find some free articles on her site:

https://www.pantley.com/elizabeth/

lola808 · September 2010

All good tips. Thanks!

Married2MrWright:
If you happen to have a baby who will sleep longer than 5-6 hours at a time, then great, but I think parents worry way too much about trying to get baby to sleep for 8-10-12 hours at a stretch.

I completely agree with this. A only STTN at about 4 months (and, when he did, followed the above routine). For a while, I thought he was just going to be one of those babies who just naturally woke very frequently. Now that he's done it, though, I really miss it! We enjoyed 5 weeks of it and now he's back to the constant waking, Last night was another rough one. We're just hoping to get back into his previous routine.

Married2MrWright · September 2010

lola808:

All good tips. Thanks!

Married2MrWright:
If you happen to have a baby who will sleep longer than 5-6 hours at a time, then great, but I think parents worry way too much about trying to get baby to sleep for 8-10-12 hours at a stretch.

I completely agree with this. A only STTN at about 4 months (and, when he did, followed the above routine). For a while, I thought he was just going to be one of those babies who just naturally woke very frequently. Now that he's done it, though, I really miss it! We enjoyed 5 weeks of it and now he's back to the constant waking, Last night was another rough one. We're just hoping to get back into his previous routine.

I hope it's just developmental strides or teething and you all get back to a good night's sleep soon! When Libby hit about 5.5 months old we found that the more active she was during the day the better she went down and slept at night. So we started making sure that we got outside daily for walks and playtime and more physical activity while playing on the floor together.

mrspresley · September 2010

Married2MrWright:
Perhaps he's having a growth spurt, reaching a developmental milestone and/or teething? All of those could certainly lead to more night wakings.

this was my first thought! i hope he gets to sleeping better for you again soon

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