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Working Moms
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Tell me about being a working mom with 2 kids
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I posted on 2u2, but then thought this might be a better place for this question:
DH and I are very close to decision time to try for #2. We want them to be close in age for numerous reasons, but we are both scared to death that we won't be able to handle two! We both work and commute. I have Fridays off, so that is nice, but it is just so much work with one sometimes I can't imagine having two. We know we want this, but we can't seem to wrap our heads around how it would all work out, but I guess it just does right?
Can some of you working moms tell me how you do it!? Were you scared or nervous to go from one to two? Was it easier or harder than you anticipated? I think I just need reassurace that it can be done and it is worth it!
TIA!
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Re: Tell me about being a working mom with 2 kids
I've said this before but I think most women can handle more than they think. When I was PG with the twins I thought there was NO way I could work full time with twin infants. But I did. Then when I was PG with #3 I said there is NO way I can handle twin toddlers, a newborn and working FT. But I did. Yes things get chaotic at times but after you figure out a routine things get easier.
You will figure out the logistics as you go.
My twins are 5! My baby is 3!
DS#2 - Allergic to Cashew, Pistachio, Kiwi
DS#3 - Allergic to Milk, Egg, Peanut, Tree Nuts and Sesame
ditto the others....I found going from 0-1 to be far harder than going from 1-2. Sure there are days where I wonder what the heck we were thinking, etc....but overall it's not that bad. Just requires more coordination/logistics.
We are also pondering a 3rd. We must all be insane
My kids are nearly 2 years apart, which is what we wanted. I've been back at work for nearly a month now and let me tell you - it's a lot of work!! My DH and I pretty much split all the kid/house work 50/50 (except I do a bit more on Fridays since I don't work Fridays) and even w/ us splitting everything, we basically don't sit down until about 9:30pm each night. It's hectic and chaotic but my kids are still pretty young AND we're still trying to get some things sorted out and organized. For instance, I know life would be easier if we planned some meals (which has been on my To Do list for oh, 3 months now
).
Having said all that, I'm still glad that we had our kids as close together as we did. I know it'll get easier as they get older and can do more for themselves and become more independent. Sure, things are crazy now and I may not look or be as put together as I like but it's definitely "do-able".
I think the big thing, and I'm still try to do this myself, is to just lower your expectations. The house isn't as clean, we don't have as much free time, and neither DH or I have found time to workout since having #2. But, oh well!
I did the 2 under 2 thing. All I can say is that the first few weeks with a newborn and toddler were very hard. There were days that I wondered if I was going to make it. As Owen got older it got easier and Savannah became a big help. My kids are 16 months apart and now looking back I wouldn't have it any other way. They are the best of friends. When Savannah is at school Owen is looking for her and asks over and over where she is and when will she be back. Its so cute.
All I can say is get into a routine and schedule with both kids. It will be hard at first. My H and I divided and conqured. It was the only way to do it. Going back to work was easier with the 2nd one. It took really no more time to get 2 ready than it did 1. I always made sure the diaper bag was packed the night before. Really anything I could get ready the night before I did. I helped make the mornings easier. There are lots of people who work full time and have 2 young children. Its hard but keep in mind as they get older it gets easier. My kids now can get themselves dressed and ready to go. Good luck.
You can do it! It won't always be easy, but you can do it. For us, planning ahead as much as possible helps tremendously. Some things we do: Meal planning/grocery shopping for the week on Sat or Sun; cook a large batch of something (mac & cheese, chicken enchiladas, etc. and freeze one or two extra), set out a week's worth of outfits for both kids on Sunday nights, make bottles the night before, etc.
Ours are 16.5 mo apart and they haven't made us run screaming for the hills yet
(though there have been days...)
GL with your decision!
I agree with Duchess on a lot of things. ML was great b/c DD1 was in daycare during that time. First going back was not quite as hard emotionally as it was with #1, but felt very overwhelming with the pumping and juggling two kids. Now, finally, DD2 is sleeping through the night, DD1 is potty-trained and at a great age for doing more on her own, and no more pumping. I finally see the light! And of course I would never change things now.
I also agree that the transition from 0 kids to 1 kid is a lot harder than 1-->2. Going from 1 to 2, you just know what to expect, are more laid-back and don't sweat the small stuff. You know your baby will sleep instead of wondering if you'll ever sleep again like with #1. You also know how fast it really goes, so you appreciate the baby stage more.
My girls are starting to play together and I tell DD1 all the time that DD2 is her best friend to instill that closeness. I really can't wait to watch them grow up together.