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Babies: 3 - 6 Months
You'll never f-ing believe what my daycare did! (Long)
I am just sick over this entire situation. Today is the first day of week three back to work. I have had a hard time as it is leaving her. When I was pregnant, I interviewed seven different providers before deciding on this center. It is a faith based daycare center with a 4 to 1 infant:teacher ration and it's close to home! I really like the lead teacher and she is always doing fun activities like foot print painting and playing in tubs of random items for baby to play with texture (jello, spaghetti noodles, water, etc).
Then today, I get the call. It's from their corporate office with the director of my center on conference. Apparently there was a teacher interviewing and during the final stages of their interview processing they allow them to interact with the children including feedings, diaper changes, etc. Well, the interviewee fed my DD her bottle and then went on to feed another child. During feeding the other child, the bottle was interupted. When she went back to continuing feeding, she returned to my DD! She fed my DD ANOTHER WOMAN'S BREASTMILK. It makes me sick to my stomach- a stranger!
The corporate person assured me that the policy has been immediately changed and they will no longer be allowing interactive interviewees to feed or change diapers. They were very sorry, blah, blah, blah. The person was asked to leave and will not be working for my daycare. I don't have any time off to look for another daycare- I just came back! I called our 2nd choice and they won't have any openings until October. I'm just heartbroken becaue I really liked and trusted the lead teacher there. When DH picked up DD, the lead teacher kissed DD and told her she would miss her and started to tear up.
What do you think? Is this a honest human error that could happen anywhere? Is this a deal breaker and I need to pull her ASAP? This is by far my worst day as a mom. I just want to say home and protect her! Stupid bills...
This discussion has been closed.
Re: You'll never f-ing believe what my daycare did! (Long)
DD#1 is 3! And LO#2 is on his/her way! Due Feb 26th, 2014.
BFP#1: EDD 5/7/2010 born on 5/20/2010. A little girl named Emily.
BFP#2: m/c 10/29/2012 EDD was 6/21/2012 Baby Hope was 6 weeks 3 days.
BFP#3: Twin B stopped growing at 8 weeks and 5 days. Found on 8/10/2014. EDD was 2/26/2014. Twin A is still doing great and due date is 2/26/14.
Thanks. This is kind of what I am thinking but then if anything else did happen and I didn't see this as a warning, I'd never get over the guilt. Such a hard decision!
Honestly, I wouldn't pull her if I were in the situation. The mistake was that of a person who isn't employed there and the center has already taken steps to ensure that non-employees won't be doing feedings from now on. Now, if one of the employees had done something you didn't like and/or the center didn't address it to your liking, then I'd have a problem.
The only think I may insist on is that the center cover the cost of testing the breast milk she was given just to make sure your daughter hasn't been exposed to something.
Going by Mom's word, she is healthy and even has to limit certain foods b/c her LO has a sensative tummy. She gave them permission to send me her name and number but I haven't called yet. I also had them request the Hep and HIV screenings from her prenatal visits. They have also offered to pay for these screenings for my DD. I talked to the pedi and she said she would definitely do the tests but they can be tramatic for such a same child because so much blood is needed from such little veins. We are going to review her medical records and then decide what to do. UGH!
I would ask about this ASAP. I would also call my pediatrician. I would want to discuss any problems that this may cause with them. Your pediatrician will probably be able to discuss what to look for in worst case senario situations. Mostly, for my own peace of mind.
DD#1 is 3! And LO#2 is on his/her way! Due Feb 26th, 2014.
BFP#1: EDD 5/7/2010 born on 5/20/2010. A little girl named Emily.
BFP#2: m/c 10/29/2012 EDD was 6/21/2012 Baby Hope was 6 weeks 3 days.
BFP#3: Twin B stopped growing at 8 weeks and 5 days. Found on 8/10/2014. EDD was 2/26/2014. Twin A is still doing great and due date is 2/26/14.
This is exactly what DH and I discussed. They could have easily not told us. Thanks for your feedback!
Yep, called the pedi right away. I'm a little OCD about germs and cleaning, you can only imagine how I felt about another woman's bodily fluid going into my child. Pedi's office was actually very comforting and reminded me that in many countries, people still use wet nurses and NICU babies frequently recieve donated milk. Granted, those people are screened. Also, see reply below-
Going by Mom's word, she is healthy and even has to limit certain foods b/c her LO has a sensative tummy. She gave them permission to send me her name and number but I haven't called yet. I also had them request the Hep and HIV screenings from her prenatal visits. They have also offered to pay for these screenings for my DD. I talked to the pedi and she said she would definitely do the tests but they can be tramatic for such a same child because so much blood is needed from such little veins. We are going to review her medical records and then decide what to do. UGH!
I can't imagine what you are going through! I am so sorry that this happened and you are handling it, by far... way better than I would! I am an ex-daycare teacher turned stay at home mom. So I can see from both the teacher's point of view and your point of view as a mother.
First let me say as a mother I would be PI$$ED! I'm not even sure how I would handle it if it were my child but as a outsider looking in...
It wasn't your child's teacher that made the mistake... correct? and The center has changed the policy to make sure that this mistake doesn't happen again... correct? Then I don't see why you can't take your LO back to the center. You really like her teacher and the center! You have to remember that great childcare centers are hard to find and that there is no perfect child care center.
Again, I am saying this as an outsider... because I don't think that I could be forgiving enough myself to take my LO back! I tend to hold a grudge for a very very long time.
Alright with that said... as a childcare provider... I worked at a NAEYC accredited, 5 STAR licensed center (in the state of NC that's the best of the best) . The tuition just to give you an insight was $2100 a month for an infant! Now, the infant room had a ratio of 1:3. A college degreed infant teacher accidentally gave one child another mother's breast milk. They had to go through the same protocal that your child's day care went through. The teacher was honest and admitted that she made the mistake. I'm not exactly sure what happened to her, although I know she kept her job. She was a great teacher! Someone that I would trust to keep my kids over night. She had a ginuine love for teaching children and just made a mistake... as we all do! (Still no excuse when I look at it from a mother's point of view.
I doubt this has helped much! I truly don't know how I would handle this as a mother. Good luck... I'm sure you are going to make the best decision for your LO no matter what that is!
DD1 born 5/24/10.
Missed M/C at 14 wks Feb 2012.
DD2 born 5/14/13.
Missed M/C at 9 wks July 2015.
I have worked in daycare for several years and this has happened. In 1 day care that I worked in we had 2 vital steps to help prevent this from happening. All BM bottles had a red rubber band around them to alert the person that this is a special bottle. Then all bottles were required to be verified by another person. So if you are getting ready to feed a child then you would pick up that child and the bottle, then go to a co-worker and say "This Bob's bottle, and this is Bob" The other person would then check that the right bottle is being fed to the right baby. Maybe you can suggests something along those lines to then for future.
Just an FYI, your daycare can request the screenings from the other mom but they can't force her to provide them. Its a violation of her rights.
This helped SO much!! It makes me feel better to know it could happen anywhere. Thank you for sharing this story. I still have no idea what I'm going to do.
Wow, I'd be ticked! Call the mom if she gave them her number. DId they tell you how much she had? Honestly, I would worry, but not too much. Sure it would gross me out that my child got another woman's breastmilk, but most likely she is a responsible person and if something was wrong with her, then she would not breastfeed. If your pedi says the tests are stressful to your small baby, then I would avoid that.
LIke a previous poster said, this daycare will probably be extra careful with your baby from now on. And calling you was good. And they changed a policy and didn't hire that woman. Maybe they need to throw in a free week or two!
I'm totally going to suggest this tomorrow! They aren't going to try to force her, just request her records from recent previous screenings. I figure I had to have all these screenings when I was pregnant, and if the roles where reversed, I would shared this informatin. Thanks for the idea!
Oh wow. I'm so sorry this happened. I agree with the other ladies, about calling the pedi and I'm glad you already have. I honestly don't know what I would do in a situation like this. I'd be pretty upset (as you obviously are). I'm glad they've changed their policy since that's happened...I do kind of give them the side eye for having the interviewee's changing diapers and feeding before they were properly checked first. Maybe that's just me though.
I hope you're able to come to a decision that you're comfortable with. I'm sorry this happened. Keep us updated
She had 1.5 oz. They have actually offered a month for free, that's a little over $800! Not that is a reason to stay but it was nice to offer.
You are so very welcome! You're a great mom and you are going to make the right choice!
You're handling it A LOT better than I would have, thats for sure.
My kid would not be returning.. and even then, I may call whatever board/agency oversees daycares, but thats just me!
Honestly, if it was an employee that made the mix up, then I'd be MORE understanding. I would NEVER approve of interviewees interacting with my child without my knowledge/consent. I mean, these interviewees, have they had their background/criminal checks done, and what about reference checks? Just skeeves me out, thats all.
But more power to you for being calm and understanding!!!
It sounds like the day care is trying to do the right thing and only you can make the decision as to whether you take your child back there.
If you go and accept any credit or money for what happened, don't sign any release and/or other document until you have fully investigated and evaluated whether your LO was exposed to any illness or disease. I say this as an attorney. The day care center and their insurance company have an incentive to minimize the damage and try to prevent you from filing a claim against them. The last thing you want to do is sign away your rights for a month of free day care especially if you find out later that your LO was exposed to something. Just don't be rushed into signing anything.
I would follow up with your pediatrician, talk to the other mother and perhaps see if you can get her records and/or ask her to take some tests.
This.
That would skeeve me. I don't know if I would pull her out right away. They were open and honest and didn't just not tell you, which they could have gotten away with.
I'm hoping that girl wasn't hired.
That would be a deal breaker for me.
I would keep her in the daycare but switch her over to the center that has the upcoming opening. Put it in writing to the center that this is the reason for pulling your daughter. October is only a couple weeks away.
I would be a little upset too, but I honestly think you're overreacting a little. A mistake was made, and kudos to them for letting you know about it.
I guess I don't see what the big deal is - I let DD breastfeed from my friend when she was born (my milk hadn't come in yet and my friend's DD was about 4 months at the time).
Eleanor Noelle - 18/05/12 Claire Elisabeth - 16/-5/10
I think it was an honest mistake and it sounds like the daycare is good otherwise. I would just be pissed (and let them know you are), and ask to get some sort of medical report from the other mother. I would also make sure they tell the other mother that another baby got her breastmilk.
I'm sorry you're going through this...
Gosh...i am so sorry that happened to your LO! If you trust and really like the center, I say keep her there. I think it was an honest mistake, but I am really glad that they have changed their policies about letting potential employees do any hands on work.
Have you spoken to the other mother directly? I bet she feels just as bad this has happened as you do...I know that if my BM went to another child in my sons room, I would be mortified....not that I have anything to be worried about, but I can imagine how upsetting it is to the other parent!