As a SAHM, I take care of Nathan 95% of the time, and in H's defence, he has been working 14 hour days since Nathan turned three months. Still, I'm wondering if he should be more involved with his care, at least on the weekend?? He has never...
1. Given baby a bath. He tried once when N was 5 months old, and was terrified.
2. Taken Nathan anywhere (and I mean ANYwhere) by himself
3. Cared for Nathan (at home) for more than 4 hours by himself
4. Doesn't willingly go anywhere with me and Nathan other than doc appts. He prefers leaving N with the grandparents and us going out, or one of us staying home with the baby while the other runs errands. I FORCE him sometimes (the zoo, for example) and he's happy once he gets there, where ever that maybe. Very nervous about being out with the baby.
He's a great Dad, plays with N and reads to him every chance he gets, but I'm worried that he's missing out on the little things.
Re: Poll: My husband has never... (baby related stuff)
My first marriage would not be a good example to speak to, and this time I don't have experience yet to provide.
However, I can tell you from many converations with many girlfriends that it is very normal for Dad's to be a bit fearful of the "baby" stage. Many moms have shared with me that Dad's didn't start doing things on their own with the kids until they were toddler + in age. Some do, but many are very fearful and uncomfortable with the younger baby years.
My DH has never taken DD anywhere by himself either. He also has a hard time calming her by himself. He will hold her and ask her "what is wrong baby girl?" instead of trying something to sooth her. It is so cute. I give him some ideas and then she settles. He is doing much better now though.
He is great at diapers and bath time!
I am so sorry you guys are going through this. This just makes me so thankful for my huband. He is truly the most amazing father I could ever ask for my girls.
It will get better as the kids get older and they can relate more. My daughter is 6 now and they have two days a week that is just for the two of them. I love it!
Ditto Tami. DH has never clipped her nails. I too think he is too scared.
I travel ALOT for work, so DH has her sometimes for 6 days straight! I didn't have to leave until she was 6 months old, but they bond SOO much when I'm gone. Even though it's alot of work when you are doing it alone, DH loves the time he gets to spend with her without me.
I do help out, by getting all her clothes lined up for the week, I set aside 2 days worth of lunchs befroe I leave and then leave detailed lists of what she eats and when. He says this helps out SO much, that he is able to spend more time with her without thinking about the little stuff.
Can you go on a girls day one weekend and let him have baby duty?
I'm sorry it did come out wrong - I actually wrote and re-wrote but guess I didn't put it correctly - sorry
Easter 2011
With my husband, it's a little bit of both. I am the primary caregiver,( and I want it that way) but he is anxious about being out and about with baby 'cause it's a hassle, for obvious reasons.
Miss Laura, With all due respect :-) I don't think my desire to be a SAHM caused me to "attract" a certain kind of guy , 'cause When I met and married my H, I had no idea that I wanted to be a mom, let alone a SAHM. I too, was a career woman at one point, but this is the life I have chosen post-baby. I didn't mean for this to be an attack on my husband. I'm very happy that he enables me to stay home :-)