Would it be tacky?....

MamaSquish · September 2010

DH is turning 30 this year and I was planning on having a bbq for him-but the closer it gets the more it seems like a ton of work for me, especially with a 5 month old. Not to mention, super expensive. So someone recommended doing a potluck, but I always thought they were kind of tacky. Thoughts?

IrishBrideND · September 2010

IMO yes

If you want to do something, but more low cost, do it during a non meal time (like 2-4) and just do light snacks.

Princessn678 · September 2010

I guess it depends on your group of friends and family. For 4th of July we did a potluck. Everyone brought a side dish and my brother and wife provided the main dish. It went over really well. Bonus is that everyone knew there would be at least 1 thing they liked at the party.

ASmallWonder · September 2010

I think it's fine to ask your nearest and dearest to help out like parents, siblings and best friends. But other guests I think it would be a little rude to ask them to, in essence, chip in to throw the party.

emilysmommy2010 · September 2010

I think if you provide the main dish and ask people to bring side dishes, it wouldn't be bad.

IrishBrideND · September 2010

Princessn678:
I guess it depends on your group of friends and family. For 4th of July we did a potluck. Everyone brought a side dish and my brother and wife provided the main dish. It went over really well. Bonus is that everyone knew there would be at least 1 thing they liked at the party.

I think having a potluck for a joint celebration (the holiday) is different than doing a potluck to celebrate a particular individual....especially when one individual is "hosting." But thats JMO.

kwinters87 · September 2010

I think asking everyone to bring a side dish, and you provide all of the meat would be more appropriate than potluck.

sherina825 · September 2010

I don't think potlucks are tacky. People can offer to bring and you can accept them or not, if you don't want to ask specifically. I think it's tacky if I get invited somewhere and not at least offer to bring something. If your DH or one of his friends grills, it would be a lot easier as well. You can get one of the boys to grill and make the sides that people didn't bring.

ttimmerman · September 2010

I think the key is to say yes to those who ask if they can bring something. It might be a little rude for you to ask people to bring something, but if they offer, that's a different story. With my group of friends, we often do potluck style get togethers - usually whoever house it's at will supply the main dish, and then the rest of us bring sides or dessert. Whenever I go to a BBQ I ask what I can bring in case the hostess needs help.

sherina825 · September 2010

kwinters87:
I think asking everyone to bring a side dish, and you provide all of the meat would be more appropriate than potluck.

I guess the idea of a potluck varies because when I think of a pot luck, this is exactly what I think of.

MCC1010 · September 2010

A potluck for a get together is fine. A potluck for a birthday is tacky IMO. There are lots of things you can do for party that are not time consuming or expensive. You can make the main dish a store bought lasagna (sp) or use your crockpot to make the main dish. You can mke a deli tray by purchsing the items from BJ's/Costco/Sam's Club and arranging them yourself. Heck you cn strt buying the things you need gradually.

I had a friend who hosted a dessert party. She had it mid afternoon nd just served cupcakes, different cookies and stuff like that. Coffee and tea for drinks. Just a thought

IrishBrideND · September 2010

ttimmerman:
I think the key is to say yes to those who ask if they can bring something. It might be a little rude for you to ask people to bring something, but if they offer, that's a different story. With my group of friends, we often do potluck style get togethers - usually whoever house it's at will supply the main dish, and then the rest of us bring sides or dessert. Whenever I go to a BBQ I ask what I can bring in case the hostess needs help.

oh good idea. I agree with that.

Melly Mel · September 2010

Totally tacky.

jennygirlmt · September 2010

Potlucks in general are fine (holidays, random get togethers, etc) but never for a birthday party that you are hosting! Crock pot of meatballs and/or pulled pork, buns, and two-three sides, chips and dip would be easy, low cost and low maintenance. Feel free to accept help when offered from close friends and family.

MWoodside · September 2010

Yes, tacky. Can family members commit to bringing a dish or something & you can get the rest of the food? That way you aren't asking all the guests to bring food.

DizzyLiz422 · September 2010

My rule for this is..

If you have to ask "Is it tacky.." then yes, it probably is. And definitely in this case.

I agree with asking parents or siblings for help but I think your friends would give you the side eye for inviting them to a party then asking them to bring items. Unless they offer, but usually then they only do it to be polite.

Do something simple.

MamaSquish · September 2010

Just as I thought..thanks for the honesty and suggestions. I'm thinking burgers, pasta salad, simple stuff....that I can have ready the night before and just pull out for the table and grill. If people offer to bring an app or something, I'll accept

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