I'm a selfish, immature, brat

Twinkz · September 2010

I know this is totally unfair and incredibly childish but I can't seem to help myself and need to vent a bit. My parents have wanted to move for over 10 years. They've finally found their dream home/land, got approved for the loan and we're all going to look at it today. Under normal circumstances, I'd be thrilled. However, I'm feeling ultra childish at the moment. They currently live a 4 minute drive or a 20ish minute walk for our house. We were looking forward to having them close after the baby comes. I know many people live on opposite sides of the country, or across oceans from family which is why I know this is beyond immature. I just can't seem to get excited. I just keep thinking how this is bad timing for me (again with the selfish). They'll be about an hour away if they get this house. We will have no family "local", excluding my grandma but she has facioscapulohumeral muscular dystrophy so she can't do much anymore.

I really know this is selfish. I'm chaulking it up to hormones and I'm really pushing them to move. I just hope I can put on my big girl panties today when we go to the property.

Tarah716 · September 2010

It sucks having your family far away - be it an hour or oceans. My parents moved to Florida right before we found out we were pregnant and it SUCKS not to have them here. I take pictures of my belly so my mom can "watch me grow" and she probably won't be here the day the baby is born because she has to schedule time off. It's just a sad "woe is me" situation but I'm trying to make the best of it.

mrssburnison · September 2010

It does suck, but try to look at the positive- its only an hour- you can still visit for a day. In a few weeks/months it will seem like nothing. I used to drive 1 1/2 hours to work every day. It's really not that far... in comparision to 5 minutes yes, but it could be a lot worst. My parents live 3 hours away, and i'm thankful we can drive there for a weekend, it could be worst, they could live across the country, or across the ocean like you said. It will take time to sink in, and don't pretend that you're ok with it, if they ask explain honestly. Tell them I know you've waited a long time for this, but i've waited a long time to be a mom too... and i just had wished you'd be closer for this. If its land won't they be around for a while? They'll need time to build and what not? Just a thought...

adriasf · September 2010

I don't think you are being immature. I would be sad about that too!

Twinkz · September 2010

I know it's only an hour away. I know it could be worse. My brother lives in Japan. They had my SIL's sister within about 15 minutes but no other family in the country when my neice was born. It wasn't too terribly rough on them because in Japan you get a paid year off for maternity leave and her sister was able to take a month off, but it still wasn't "simple". That's exactly why I feel like I'm being unreasonable.

The land has a house that was built on it back in 2008. They'll need to build a pole barn and/or garage but they plan on living there while that's being done. They're hoping to be fully moved in before Christmas. In fact I think they're shooting for Thanksgiving.

I know I'll adjust. It'll just take some time and right now I'm in a pouty mood lol

myst33 · September 2010

I don't blame you for being upset, but like you said, you'll eventually adjust and things will work out fine.

Manateearmz · September 2010

I don't blame you for feeling this way at all! My whole family is over 2,000 miles away and I cried when I told them I was pregnant because I felt guilty that it had to be said over the phone instead of in person. I do have my IL's really close to us (about 5 minutes). If they moved further away I'm sure that DH would throw a fit. My MIL already has plans to go to Spain for 6-8 weeks after LO arrives and I'm sad about that.

optimist13 · September 2010

i dont think you're being immature at all. or selfish. i think its good for baby to have lots of family close by. we have no one around us and my dr BIL is telling me i should not even fly to denver for xmas, so i may not see my parents until the baby is old enough to travel! i am hoping i can go see them before xmas at least but who knows.

besides, maybe once they see the house, they wont like it as much anymore, or maybe there will be something horribly wrong with it!

Mauimom2 · September 2010

my parents live in England and my husbands parents live over 3 hours away and it is not easy. It is really hard to let them go when you have lived so close for so long. One thing I will say is that when we go over to see either of them it is much more special and you make more of an effort to do more together as you begin to plan things rather than just going over to see them. Your initial reaction is going to sad but it does get easier. =0]

March2011Mama · September 2010

It would only be selfish of you if you acted on these feelings and made your parents feel guilty about the situation. The fact that you are just feeling sad and maybe frustrated at the timing of this, that doesn't make you selfish. It's understandable! I would be very sad if I didn't have any close family around when this baby comes.

Don't worry, my mum lives an hour away from me and she sees my DS all the time. I still know that if I need her, she'll be here in an hour Smile

labooshki · September 2010

An hour isn't all that bad, but I know what you mean. My parents live about 2 minutes from my house and I freakin love it. I would be really sad if they moved.

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