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1st Trimester
kathymarie
member
I'm a statistic. I miscarried. TMI details.
kathymarie
member
Last Friday night, I had some brown spotting just when I wiped--none on my underwear. It was short, went away after, and my doctor told me it was probably nothing and if it continued at all over the weekend to call back and he'd do an ultrasound. It stopped, so I thought I was fine. We all "hear" that a little brown spotting is "normal," right?
Last night, after dinner, I started spotting again--red this time. I called the Dr. and he said to go to the ER. While there, I started bleeding heavily with a lot of clots.
They did an ultrasound and it showed no movement and no heartbeat. The nurse said the baby measured at 5w6d. They called my Dr to see if he wanted to do a D&C or whatever he wanted to proceed with. A few minutes later, I stood up and I actually passed the baby/sac/whatever. The doctor confirmed it. I saw it.
After that, they sent me home. I have a follow-up at the Dr's office today for an ultrasound to confirm that everything is out or on its way out & determine if any further medical intervention is necessary.
I'm emotionally destroyed. I feel like a fvcking failure, a cliche', & a statistic. I was so scared this would happen (I'm a tp checker), but I never thought it would really happen to me.
Anyway, I wish you all a healthy & happy 9 months. I hope to see you all back here soon. Thanks for everything.
Married 7/19/09
MC 9/8/10
Baby Boy Born 7/31/11
MC 9/8/10
Baby Boy Born 7/31/11
This discussion has been closed.
Re: I'm a statistic. I miscarried. TMI details.
I am so sorry for your loss. You are not a failure. Please don't feel like that.
The MC/PL is a great place, with lots of support and women who can understand what you are feeling right now. When you are ready, I hope you will seek them out over there.
Thank you. I was actually thinking of you while I was there and how the other day you said that spotting is not normal, even though it's common. You're right. I give you so much credit for surviving your losses with sanity. Your baby is lucky to have such a strong mommy.
MC 9/8/10
Baby Boy Born 7/31/11
I am SO sorry for your loss. Sending hugs and wishing you peace.
And... you are NOT a failure. Do not do that to yourself!
I'm so sorry. I went through a loss last year. I also have a 7 yr old daughter. I too couldn't believe it happened to me. Take care of yourself. ((hugs))
I'm so very sorry for your loss.
Please know that you are not a failure.
I agree with the PP who said the mc/pl board is a wonderfully supportive place.
(((big hugs)))
m/c 6/10
But of course please listen to your doctor, and the time frame they lay out for your health and the health your future pregnancy.
MTHFR 2 copies of C677t mutation homozygous 2/2010
Baby A born via c-section 1/10/12 @38w3d
BFP #1 11/4/09 m/c 4w3d baby crab
BFP #2 12/4/09 m/c 9w3d baby lion
BFP #3 7/1/10 m/c 4w1d baby fish
BFP #4 5/8/11
BFP #5 8/17/12 10dpo beta 7
I am so sorry.
My experience was almost identical to yours minus miscarrying at the Dr.'s office. I felt the same way - like a failure, a statistic, and that I couldn't believe it had *actually* happened to me even though it had happened to my sister so I guess I had a little bit of history with it in a way.
It really, really hurts emotionally and the whole thing just sucks in a really big way, but you will make it. Hide out at home with DH for a few days and do whatever you need to do - cry in the shower, eat junk food, just hold each other.
Once you feel well and strong again, look forward to your milestones in your first cycle - ovulation, your first period, and then go from there. I will tell you that DH and I were fortunate to get pregnant again immediately and so far it's sticking and we've seen the heartbeat. Your chances of m/c the second time around are the same as they were the first time around so don't let that shake you.
(((Hugs)))
I'm so deeply sorry for your loss. You are not a failure, you are not a statistic. You are a person who unfortunately had to experience the worst that can happen. ANd I'm so so sorry because it just SUCKS.
Please head over to the miscarriage/pregnancy loss board. Those women are amazing and will support you during this difficult time. Its a club no one wants to be a part of, but I think you will find many amazing women and friends there who all share a common bond of terrible loss.
I'm so sorry. I hope you are back soon with a successful pg.
A
((huge hugs))
you are not a failure.I dont think any of us believed we would be where we are today and I know that this time right now is VERY emotional the roller coaster sucks big time.
I mirror the sentiments of the other ladies, the mc/pl board is a great place to vent and talk.
Remembering Evelyn and raising Bailey
Evelyn Born at 24wks 6days on May 22, 2010 due to pre-e Passed away May 25, 2010
BFP# 2 Delivered 6wks early due to preeclampsia
I'm so sorry! What you are feeling is normal...I felt the same exact way you did after my m/c at 8w. I had to have a D&C and as PP said, please listen to the doctor on timing, etc. We waited one cycle and I decided to just see what happened.
When I got pregnant again, I wouldn't let myself enjoy the pregnancy because I was afraid that I would "fail" again and that I was destined to not have children even though everyone around me had perfect pregnancies and perfect kids. I didn't get attached to the baby and even had issues when he was born becoming attached - all because of previous loss and I regret it now! Just know that m/c is incredibly common - I had no idea until it happened to me and I researched and researched. You aren't alone, it wasn't anything you did. While I wanted nothing to do with anyone IRL, this board was so wonderful in helping me cope and realizing that it wasn't me..I wasn't alone! No one else seemed to understand what I was feeling but the ladies here did. Lean on us!! It's not easy by any means but a lot of us have been there and know what you are feeling. It will take time! Take care of yourself! My T&P are with you and your DH. I wish you the best of luck and hope to see you back here soon!!
MC 9/8/10
Baby Boy Born 7/31/11
For one, you are not a statistic or a failure. Lots of women m/c and go on later to have very healthy great pregnancies. Give your self lots of time and compassion...Stop judging yourself and be good to yourself. It is not your fault and you are not just a statistic, you are mourning and need to allow yourself to.
I wish you the best of luck next time