Second time around

pinksweetpea2 · September 2010

DH and I are thinking about trying for another baby in then next year, but I am SO nervous about the SAH aspect of it. I had a rough time adapting to staying at home in the beginning and I feel like I really didn't get into a good grove until Lily was older. I am really enjoying SAH right now and can for the most part keep my house (somewhat LOL) in order, the laundry (mostly) done, and put tasty meals on the table- all the while keeping Lily (and myself) happy and entertained.

I am afraid if we have another that my house will go back to *** and meals won't be made, etc. I know, reality wise, that it won't last forever, but I am having a hard time coming to terms with everything getting harder...and some of it staying harder because there will be two of them.

We do want another- I want Lily to have a sibling. The fear is not really coming from the 1 vs 2 kids overall debate.

I don't know- is any of this clear? I just keep telling myself that anything that is worth doing is hard, but for some reason that is not working. LOL

Stacyc625 · September 2010

that is why pregnancy takes 9 months- you will have plenty of time to 'adjust' to the thought that- yes it WILL be hard for a bit. but then like anything one thing gets easier and something else gets harder.

I dunno- I am not as worried as i was in the beginning of my pregnancy- i KNEW this time around what to expect (more so than going into it blindly like the first time) and i used my pregnancy time very wisely and prepared as much as i could-

will things fall to the wayside? of course.

will the world stop turning because of it?- nope.

If you want two kids- than ya have to buck up, bite the bullet and get pregnant (when you are ready to bite)- you have 9 months to prepare and adjust. Plus your child will be way old enough to help and feel like a great big sister.

littlemermaid · September 2010

I had a horrible time adjusting to staying home and also didn't get into the groove until my first was into the toddler years. But I have to say going from 1 to 2 kids was really easy for me. I already knew what to expect. I was able to not make the same mistakes I made with the first one. I was way more organized and wasn't afraid to venture out and do things with both in tow.

kmc217 · September 2010

I'm only home part time but I'm currently on maternity leave. I've found myself enjoying DD2 as a newborn even more this time than I did with DD1 because I'm so laid back and less anxious about her. I've had to relax about certain things, like laundry and cooking every meal and how much TV DD1 gets while I nurse DD2, but overall, the adjustment with the 2 of them has been good. My house is pretty orderly by the end of the night and I'm organized and efficient at getting most of what I need done. I'm VERY glad I had a summer baby, though, so we can get outside. I think if it were cold and dark I'd be a little bluesy.

wifeandmama · September 2010

My 2nd is only almost 2 weeks old but going from 1 to 2 was WAY easier than 0 to 1. When I first had Jude, I couldn't get a darn thing done.. I remember mail just sitting on the dining room table for ages, not being able to get laundry put away, dinners were a joke... this time, it's WAY WAY easier. I can actually DO things ... it is a bit more difficult (sometimes one-handed!) but they get done. And newborns sleep so so much so I have one on one time with Jude, still. I haven't done any major craft projects yet (I fear painting would turn into a huge ordeal, Noel would wake up, paint all over the floors my husband just redid, lol!) but we color together everyday, read, play trucks, whatever.

Anyway, I have managed to keep my house in order and not lose my mind yet! I remember the first few weeks with Jude were a blur and I felt so out of control but this time is very different.

Notwifezilla7 · September 2010

littlemermaid:
I had a horrible time adjusting to staying home and also didn't get into the groove until my first was into the toddler years. But I have to say going from 1 to 2 kids was really easy for me. I already knew what to expect. I was able to not make the same mistakes I made with the first one. I was way more organized and wasn't afraid to venture out and do things with both in tow.

I could have written this word for word. I got the best advice from another local nestie who told me just to put my head down and do things and so from early on, we just did!

Mrs.Hizzo · September 2010

I'm feeling the same way right now about having three. My two are so close together, it was almost like one extended infanthood, if you know what I mean. Now we're to the point where I can pretty much treat the boys as a unit. They're both in MDO, both eating the same things, bathing together, playing together, etc. Life is SO much easier than it was a year ago. And they get along beautifully. I wonder if we're screwing things up by trying for #3.

I just tell myself that it's a tough first year or two, and then life gets easier. Also, we have a pretty limited window before we just call it good (promised DH he wouldn't be older than 40 before we were done), so there's a good chance it won't even happen. For some reason, that calms me down, lol.

I will say, siblings can be truly awesome. Not that only children are deprived or anything, but if your kids get along reasonably well, it's so fun to see and makes all the work very worthwhile.

pinksweetpea2 · September 2010

Thanks ladies. I know logically it will be fine. Too bad my emotions won't fall in line all the time.

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