Cry it out question

StevieJo · September 2010

When you first started letting your LO cry it out how long did they cry? My LO has been crying for an hour now. I go in every 15 minutes and tell her mommys here and shes okay. At the 30 min mark she was quiet for 4 minutes but aside from that shes been pretty much crying the whole time. What would you do?

ETA- I have made sure all of her other needs are met... clean diaper, burped her, shes recently eaten, etc...

FutureMrs.Brady · September 2010

Not let her cry it out..that's just me though. She's too young right now. She might be hungry or need changed. That's a long time to cry for a 1 almost 2 month old.

Jaimie01 · September 2010

How old is she? Babies cant self sooth until at least 6 months if she is crying I am sure she needs something.

flippy1234 · September 2010

How old is your Lo?! 2 months? You should NOT be letting a baby that young CIO, that's awful.

StevieJo · September 2010

FutureMrs.Brady:
Not let her cry it out..that's just me though. She's too young right now. She might be hungry or need changed. That's a long time to cry for a 1 almost 2 month old.

I understand. I haven't let her do it before. But she has had to be held for every nap and sleep with me every night. I have no freedom and I'm about to go back to work. I have to try something new for my day care lady's sake. So this question is for those that do the cry it out method.

StevieJo · September 2010

flippy1234:
How old is your Lo?! 2 months? You should NOT be letting a baby that young CIO, that's awful.

Ok, I will stop. I've hated it any way. I was just going off of a bunch of different friends advice. So can I ask then, what do I do to get her to sleep on her own aka not on me for nap time. I try to let her fall asleep on me and then put her down but she wakes up. Just desperate from some good advice. Please help ladies!

Jaimie01 · September 2010

StevieJo:

FutureMrs.Brady:
Not let her cry it out..that's just me though. She's too young right now. She might be hungry or need changed. That's a long time to cry for a 1 almost 2 month old.

I understand. I haven't let her do it before. But she has had to be held for every nap and sleep with me every night. I have no freedom and I'm about to go back to work. I have to try something new for my day care lady's sake. So this question is for those that do the cry it out method.

No one should do the CIO method this young. Even those who believe in letting a baby cry it out will most likely say the same thing we are..

Jaimie01 · September 2010

StevieJo:

FutureMrs.Brady:
Not let her cry it out..that's just me though. She's too young right now. She might be hungry or need changed. That's a long time to cry for a 1 almost 2 month old.

I understand. I haven't let her do it before. But she has had to be held for every nap and sleep with me every night. I have no freedom and I'm about to go back to work. I have to try something new for my day care lady's sake. So this question is for those that do the cry it out method.

No one should do the CIO method this young. Even those who believe in letting a baby cry it out will most likely say the same thing we are..

Laura_Lee · September 2010

StevieJo:

FutureMrs.Brady:
Not let her cry it out..that's just me though. She's too young right now. She might be hungry or need changed. That's a long time to cry for a 1 almost 2 month old.

I understand. I haven't let her do it before. But she has had to be held for every nap and sleep with me every night. I have no freedom and I'm about to go back to work. I have to try something new for my day care lady's sake. So this question is for those that do the cry it out method.

Your infant wants to be held?? Really??? I had no idea that babies need their parent's care when they're too old to care for themselves.

Should have probably thought of that before you had kids, dear.

Now please, go pick up your freaking kid.

ama4121 · September 2010

This post really upsets me. You should really do some research on CIO. Even advocates advise on waiting at least 4 months.

Chickpea2010 · September 2010

it helps if i put lo down and keep my hands on his chest/tummy until he goes all relaxed again. helps transition from warm arms to cooler crib.

katieriedel · September 2010

I got very lucky with my LO and he isn't much of a crier but when he does cry it's because he is really gassy. I lay him on his back and move his legs like he is on a bike and then gently push both of his legs up against his stomach and he will fart and I do that over and over again until I can't get any more gas out of him. Then I hold him against my chest and walk around until he falls asleep then wait about 10 minutes so he is in a deep sleep and I put him down and he will sleep for a few hours.

Good luck getting LO to calm down, but please don't let her cry it out. She is too young.

Chicka03 · September 2010

Babies this age should not CIO since they can't self soothe. Holding a baby, following their cues, and not sleeping are part of being a parent. Its hard but it gets better. CIO should not be done til around 6 months.

StevieJo · September 2010

Thank you for the advice ladies. Trust me I'm doing everything I can to be the best mom I can be. Which is why I tried this in the first place (because it was the advice I got) I've held her all day every day since she got this way at about 3 weeks (except for the maybe one hour at night DH sometimes holds her). I'm crying so hard because I love her so much and I just want to help her, I just feel so helpless. I guess all moms have these days.

Mrs.B6302007 · September 2010

Remember, crying is your LO's communication for now. She's trying to tell you something: she's hungry, wet, dirty, overly tired, etc. It sounds like the latter since she's having napping problems. Have you tried swaddling?

Chickpea2010 · September 2010

StevieJo:
Thank you for the advice ladies. Trust me I'm doing everything I can to be the best mom I can be. Which is why I tried this in the first place (because it was the advice I got) I've held her all day every day since she got this way at about 3 weeks (except for the maybe one hour at night DH sometimes holds her). I'm crying so hard because I love her so much and I just want to help her, I just feel so helpless. I guess all moms have these days.

Hang in there. I have cried right along with LO plenty of times when he just wouldn't stop. I get frustrated when I can't put LO down, too, but then I think that one day I will wish I could hold him all day and it helps me relax a little. She won't need this forever. And seriously, try keeping your hands on her for a while after you put her down. A bumpie gave me that advice and it really does work 9 times out of 10. So simple yet so effective!

Chicka03 · September 2010

I feel your pain! My DD had colic and cried all day long! If you get frustrated put her down and step outside and take some deep breathes. Some things that were lifesavers during those times were The Happiest Baby on the Block DVD, sound machine, Miracle Blanket, car/stroller rides, put baby in carseat on top of dryer, gas drops or gripe water. It WILL get better I promise!

anmorgan32 · September 2010

I play the sea horse and rub my lo's head if he wakes up when i try to lay him down, that usually soothes him and he'll doze back off. 1ht

PubStar09 · September 2010

I was going to flame you for CIO so young, but looks like everyone else beat me to it.

When DS is freaking out, we put him in his bed, swaddled, with a sound machine (a hair dryer works too). Stick a pacifier in his mouth and leave when he falls asleep. With all of these steps (from Happiest Baby on the Block), it usually only takes 10 minutes or so. Try it.

(Obviously, if you use a hair dryer, make sure to run it on the coolest setting and turn it off before leaving the room. The sound machines can stay on while they sleep though)

biohaz444 · September 2010

Infants shouldn't "cry it out" - they cry when they *need* something, not just because. Even if their "need" is to be held and to know that you *are* actually there, that is a need. If you aren't in their line of sight, babies don't know you're nearby, even if you tell them every 15 minutes. For the first 6 months to year, you should pick your child up if they're crying, and check the diaper again, even if you just changed it, it may be wet...

Angela814 · September 2010

Have you tried a swing? Will LO take a pacifier? Maybe she's still hungry? Mine sometimes eats every hour.

biohaz444 · September 2010

StevieJo:
Thank you for the advice ladies. Trust me I'm doing everything I can to be the best mom I can be. Which is why I tried this in the first place (because it was the advice I got) I've held her all day every day since she got this way at about 3 weeks (except for the maybe one hour at night DH sometimes holds her). I'm crying so hard because I love her so much and I just want to help her, I just feel so helpless. I guess all moms have these days.

It works differently for each baby, but if you try putting her down before she's completely asleep, or in a different spot than you've been trying, it might help - for example, mine sometimes is ok in his co-sleeper, but sometimes when he hits his arms or legs against the side, he'll wake up and scream... however, he won't do that in the pack and play (usually)... there are times that nothing works, and I'm online at 3 am bc he'll fall asleep on me and will stay down after he's been asleep for a WHILE... usually it's just 5 minutes or so..

try charting and seeing when she's fussy, when she'll go down smoothly, when she's pooping, eating, etc... I find that Cole is fussy when we wakes around 3 til 4ish, and it's usually gas pains - what works for him is his back against my tummy, with his legs curled up against his tummy - I just hold his feet up until his back curls a little, and he usually calms down and we sit like that for a while and he'll just fart away..

IndieMum · September 2010

I've never let W 'cry it out' so to speak, but if he's overly tired, he gets fussy sometimes before he falls asleep... it's more like tired little whines than a real cry though. if he's crying without any breaks between for more than like 2 minutes, I check and see if he needs something.

I know how you feel though, it's tough on the arms holding a baby 24/7 and will drive you crazy!

If you have a bouncy chair, try putting it next to you while you do something (eating, knitting, computering, whatever) and bounce it with your foot. I'm actually doing that right now... ha

Also have you considered using drops for her tummy? I have heard lots of success stories with Mylicon drops... could be she is overly gassy and needs relief.

Hope you get it figured out soon!

stpetegirl · September 2010

PubStar09:
I was going to flame you for CIO so young, but looks like everyone else beat me to it.
When DS is freaking out, we put him in his bed, swaddled, with a sound machine (a hair dryer works too). Stick a pacifier in his mouth and leave when he falls asleep. With all of these steps (from Happiest Baby on the Block), it usually only takes 10 minutes or so. Try it.
(Obviously, if you use a hair dryer, make sure to run it on the coolest setting and turn it off before leaving the room. The sound machines can stay on while they sleep though)

Try these things and get Happiest Baby on thhe Block, book or dvd. It was a lifesaver for us with dd.

biohaz444 · September 2010

gripe water may help, too - I've heard good things about Target's Baby Bliss, but you may want to talk to your dr

wifeofaussie · September 2010

If you're not anti-pacifier, I'd give that a try. Also, my swing is a lifesaver! DD gets incredibly fussy when she's overly tired. I just pop her in the swing, give her a pacifier and she's out in a couple of minutes.

chmana · September 2010

She's too young to cry it out. You need to rub her back, swaddle her with a swaddle blanket when she's sleeping, walk around with her, get a sleep sheep (this helps my baby go to sleep), and use a pacifier with her.

VandRicky · September 2010

You are kidding, right?

BakerMommy · September 2010

I'd recommend reading the Baby Whisperer books. She's all about teaching babies to fall asleep on their own without crying it out. I totally agree with PP--2 months is too young to self soothe. If she's crying, she needs something--and it might just be you!

MattysGirl81 · September 2010

All her needs aren't being met...she wants to be held.

Please don't let your INFANT cry like that.

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