those who adopted their 2nd child (or any subsequent children)

MayDayGirl · September 2010

I have days where I am going crazy, like I just want a baby now! Then I have days where I love being just me and my little man that I don't want it to end and I think it could go on forever with just him and I.

The days wanting a baby FAR outway the days where I am happy to stay this way for a while. But it's SO hard because everyone around me is having their second, or has already had their second, whereas I know ours could come anyday, but I feel like we're not really working on a second because we have nothing to show for it (ie bump). Though it's been almost a full year.

I don't really have a question, just a rambling of sort and wondering if others felt this way. It was so much better when we had due dates, but then of course, those have all fallen through.....

wille2b · September 2010

just saying sorry!! me and my mom pray everyday that your baby comes home soon!! we just cant figure out how you havent been chosen yet!!

Magoy · September 2010

"I have days where I am going crazy, like I just want a baby now! Then I have days where I love being just me and my little man that I don't want it to end and I think it could go on forever with just him and I."

I feel the EXACT same way as this and we aren't even into the process of adoption yet. We're stuck in the "are we one and done?" or "do we want to adopt?"

And I really hate it when people say this to me..."Just enjoy Audrey and be thankful for what you have!" OBVIOUSLY I'm going to enjoy her. Had my uterus not been yanked from my body and I was still able to bear children, no one would say this to me.

Hang in there. Your baby will be with you soon...

DBurket · September 2010

I just wanted to write and tell you I know how you feel! We are waiting for baby #2 and it is hard. We have had a few leads on possible situations, but nothing has materialized into a match yet.

I am trying very hard to stay calm and patient. And to be fair to you, I must admit we have just started the waiting process and certainly haven't gone through all the heartache you have. But every day gets harder?both because I am so anxious and excited and READY to have a new baby, but also because I am sad that each day that passes is one less I have to spend with just my son (if that makes sense).

Our first adoption happened VERY QUICKLY. We were only on "the list" for three weeks when we got the call to fly the next day to Texas to pick up our one week old baby boy. Because of this, we know that we (and everyone around us) have skewed expectations on timeframe. As a result, we've decided to only tell our parents and my very best girlfriends we are officially back on this list this time. Lots of people know we are planning on adopting again, just not that we are already on the list. We figured this way we won't have siblings and friends asking us why it's taking so long in comparison to our first adoption.

Not having all the questions is nice, but on the flip side it feels a little lonely. I just went to a baby shower the other night for a friend. She is having her second in about a month. Everyone was gushing over her and her preparations (rightfully so!) and asking similar questions about preparations with all the other guests who were pregnant. And there I sat. I couldn't help but think of our first adoption and know that it was entirely possible (although not at all likely) that we could still have a baby before she did. Yet no one knew to congratulate me or ask if I was excited. I had no "bump", as you put it. Even if they all knew we were officially waiting, no one really knows how to celebrate and support someone as they prepare for a baby but have no idea when the baby might arrive.

Hang in there and know you're not alone! I pray every day that we (and by "we" I am including everyone on this board!) will feel peace as we go through this process.

P.S. I am sending you a private message, so check your inbox!

hoping4more · September 2010

I too know how you feel. We mostly have the "I want a baby NOW" feelings though.

Jermysgirl · September 2010

I'm right there with you...I want another baby, but I am SO not looking forward to the infant stage! I'm enjoying DD so much - she's so independent and fun, I'm going to miss it being just the two of us.

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