Working Moms
kamcfarlane
member
daycare while on maternity leave?
kamcfarlane
member
in Working Moms
i know this has been asked before, but now that i'm pregnant, i can't find any of the posts. sorry!
i am expecting our 2nd LO in early may. DS will be 2.5yo. i will likely have a c-section. my mom will be here for the first week. i hope to take 12 weeks off and then work 3 days a week for 4 weeks (both kids will be in DC when i'm working).
i can't decide whether to leave DS in DC while i'm on maternity leave. i definitely want him home during the first week to spend time with his grandma and to bond with the baby. after that, i'm unsure. part of me wants him home so we can save some cash and part of me wants to keep him on his schedule and gvie myself time to recover/bond with the baby.
any thoughts???
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Re: daycare while on maternity leave?
When DS #3 was born we kept the older boys in DC. They went to DC the morning of my c-section then DH went to pick them up in the afternoon so they could come visit me and meet the baby. They then went to DC on their normal schedule every day after that.
I really wanted to keep their routine as consistent as possible. Also, they were only 26 months when #3 was born so I didn't have to deal with jealousy or anything like that. I'm not sure they were aware that I was home with the baby while they were at DC.
My mom came after DH went back to work and her main task was to drive the boys to and from DC until I was allowed to drive. Then in the evenings, she was on baby duty so DH and I could concentrate on the older boys - feed them dinner, give them baths and follow their regular bed time routine.
Once my mom left it was nice to have time during the day to concentrate on the baby, nap when he did (something I was NOT able to do when the twins were infants) and continue getting BF well established.
Keeping the boys in DC worked out well for us. Good luck whatever you decide!
My twins are 5! My baby is 3!
DS#2 - Allergic to Cashew, Pistachio, Kiwi
DS#3 - Allergic to Milk, Egg, Peanut, Tree Nuts and Sesame
Similar situation here. I will have a c/s, my mom and MIL will probably come help me out the first couple weeks. I plan to continue sending DS to daycare just about everyday (although, I imagine he will stay home with me one or two days a week once I'm feeling recovered enough). My thoughts are that I want him to be able to keep his routine. Also, I remember how chaotic those early newborn days were and I don't want to feel frustrated or torn between the two kids. The extra money would be nice, but ultimately, I think we're all better off if he sticks to his schedule!!!
A resounding YES to this - DD #1 was home for about a week when #2 was born, but then she went to DC the rest of my leave. Both #1 and #2 will be home a little while when #3 is born, then back to daycare/preschool it will be. Gives me time to bond with #3 and keeps them in their routine, which they thrive on.
Then again, for us, there was no saving money aspect - for us, we'd have to keep paying to keep their spots in daycare and preschool - so even more reason to just send them- to not waste that money.
We kept Griffin in full time daycare while i was on maternity leave with the twins. He had plenty of time to bond with them on weekends and when he got home after school.... I did NOT want him home with me that first week all day long- I wanted to give the babies my full attention at that time- and have Griffin keep his routine- and having fun - b/c being home with a mom who just had a c/s and 2 babies is NOT fun for a 2 y/o.
I also wanted to give the twins the same time alone that I gave Griffin when I was on leave with him.
We saved money so we could afford daycare while i was not being paid. it was well worth the cost for us.... Griffin got to have fun, learn, maintain routine, and I got to spend those 5 months with the twins during that special time.
If/when I have #2, DD will still go to daycare. I may pick her up earlier than normal, but she'll still go. Her world is daycare now and I'd like to disrupt it as little as possible.
I pulled DS out of daycare while I was on leave - I just didn't want to pay for it. However, I had a very easy delivery with DD and was feeling great a few days after she was born.
She was born on a Tuesday, so we kept DS in daycare the rest of the week (since it was paid for) to give me a few days at home to adjust before having both of them.
If you'd like, a good balance might be to keep your 1st in daycare for a few weeks until you're recovered, then pull him out.
GL!
Zachary Ryan - 1/13/08 - 6lbs 15oz, 20.5 inches
Lilia Rose - 5/11/10 - 8lbs 6oz, 21 inches
DD was 2.5 when DS was born. Our "leave" period is very long -- I was on maternity leave for almost 5 months, now MIL is watching DS during the summer (she's a teacher, so she has summers off), and then DH is taking his paternity leave in the fall. When it's all said and done, it will be about 11 months with someone on "leave."
We definitely didn't want to pull DD out of preschool for 11 months! What we did is keep her home for the entire first week DH was home to help with her, while I recovered and cared for DS.
After that, we dropped her down to school days (9 AM-2 PM), 4 days/week. It's a nice balance. When I was on leave, I liked having a day to play "stay at home mom" with her, LOL. Doing all the things we can't do when I'm working, like Friday morning classes at the art museum, or visiting the zoo when it wasn't super-packed like it is on the weekends. It also saved us a little money (about 25% off the full-time tuition). But I couldn't have done that every day, and so it was nice to be able to send her to school, let her play with her friends, and keep up her routine, while I had time alone with DS.
Now that MIL is caring for DS, it's good to give HER a bit of a break, because keeping up with two kids all day every day is a lot to ask!
Mommy to DD1 (June 2007), DS (January 2010), DD2 (July 2012), and The Next One (EDD 3/31/2015)
(I don't have time to read through the other posts so if this is a duplicate, I apologize!)
A few things:
- Do you have the option of taking him out but still ensuring your spot for when you go back to work? I know most daycares won't let you hold your spot free of charge.
- Is your daycare close to your home or DH's job?
- Do you have the option of a part-time schedule while you're home?
I just returned to work and we kept DD in daycare for my entire leave. I have to tell you, it worked out AWESOME! We kept her on the regular morning schedule but I'd pick her up a bit earlier than normal. I don't know how I would have survived the first month or two with her home. (And yes, I know people do it all the time!) But, it was really nice being able to just spend time with DD #2 and not have to worry about entertaining DD #1. Plus, she was able to have time w/ her friends at daycare and I really think keeping her on her regular schedule was invaluable!
Having 2 kids is a LOT of work so I say give yourself a break whenever you can. If this means sending DS to daycare, then do it. Good luck and congrats!
we do have the option of taking him part time and not losing his spot. it's possible that we have the most laid-back, chill daycare provider of all time.
daycare is located about a half mile from our house, so it's super convenient.
i work from home FT now, and hope to work PT for the first 4 weeks i'm back (i work for the government, so again, flexibility).
thanks everyone for your responses. i really appreicate knowing what other people have done! i think we'll keep him home the first week when my mom is here, then send him full time. when i go back to work, both kiddos will go to DC when i'm working (3 days then 5) and stay home when i'm not.
thanks again!!