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Shower dilema

Bexx24Bexx24 member
in Military Families

So I'm only about 10 weeks along, but I'm already pondering this issue:

 We're recently moved to this new duty station, and I'm wondering what to do about a shower. I'd like to have one, this is our first baby and we're excited, but we have no family anywhere nearby at all (immediate family is a 17 hour drive. next closest are 3 and 10 hours away.)

I don't have many friends in this area, one or two but not enough for a party. And I've decided to not get a job, since I don't want to work once the baby comes so I don't know if I'll be making many more friends, at least probably not close ones to have a shower with.... so what should I do about a shower?

A) Have a shower in December when we go home for Christmas even though it would be very early? (I'll only be like 26 weeks by then)

B) Have a shower after the baby is born sometime next summer the next time we go home.

I suppose there is always the C) option of making another trip home when I'm further along, but I'd really rather not fly all the way home while that pregnant if I can avoid it. Plus, what would I do with all the stuff I got?

 If anyone has a D) solution or has been in the same situation let me know! Thanks!

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Re: Shower dilema

  • shall923shall923 member
    I went with option A for my shower. We had orders to the west coast and all our friends and family were on or near the east coast. So, they gave me a shower before we moved. I was a little over 24 weeks. I had to travel to another state but at that point I was feeling good so the drive was fine. 
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  • Bexx24Bexx24 member
    Thanks, I was leaning towards that option myself, as it just seems to make the most sense. We'll be making the drive for Christmas so we'll have the car to bring everything home in, and I feel like NOT having a shower with my family isn't an option, since it's the first grandbaby and they're more excited than I am lol! But every time I mention it to someone they say, "oh my goodness, that's far too early you CAN'T do that!"
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  • leslie13510leslie13510

    If it's going to be back home, I don't see a problem with having one as early as 26 weeks.  That's about the time mine was because I was having all kinds of problems and we didn't know how long I was going to carry my pregnancy.  I think the normal "rules" of what point in your pregnancy you should have a shower can be bent if the location is far away or you're having complications.

     

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  • shall923shall923 member
    One thing I would recommend is if people want to get you big items have them sent to you. They can always bring a picture to the shower and you can show it off to the other guest. We have a Toyota 4-Runner and all the big gifts would not fit. If you are going to have Christmas presents too you might run out of room fast.
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  • Brit242Brit242

    I'm having my shower at 19 weeks because I'm moving to Germany 3 weeks later.  We won't know the sex yet, so we're going neutral, but the whole family is on board with it and understands that our options are limited.  I don't think 26 weeks would be too early at all.

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  • Mereou12Mereou12 member

    I'd go with option A.

    I was in the exact same position -- we live 13+ hours away from family, and my friends planned my shower during a scheduled trip home. I just so happened to be about 26 weeks, as well. Sure, it's a little earlier than usual, but when you live on the other side of the country, people are understanding!

    Congrats!

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  • armybride6510armybride6510 member
    I agree with the other girls December would work fine I will only be about 25 weeks when I have mine because I want it before the holidays.
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  • shaysmom05shaysmom05 member
    That's pretty much the same thing I'll be doing. I have a few friends here, but it's not going to be a BIG deal. When we go home for the holidays, we will probably have a shower then. I agree about the big gifts. We have a nice sized truck, so bringing them back won't be an issue. For those who can't make it to either shower, I'm registering on Amazon and other websites online. That way, they can still see what we need/would like and just have it sent to us without having to worry about wrapping and shipping possible big items. GL!
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  • HappyMommy28HappyMommy28 member
    Option A.  i was 21 weeks when my family had my shower.  I wasn't showing that much yet but I had fun.  I couldn't imagine my sister not being there (which had I had one later she wouldn't have been)
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  • Smudges*MomSmudges*Mom member
    You've gotten good advice regarding your shower. I would suggest making some more friends/build a good support network where younlive now, especially since you plan to be a SAHM. As a SAHM (who has recently moved), life can be very hard without a few friends, reasons to get out and things to do. There have been times, when I have not been proactive, that I have felt very isolated. Make connections now, make friends with other pregnant ladies and new moms. If you attend church, you might want to see if there is a local MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) Program. You are welcome to join as a pregnant woman. Good luck with everything!
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  • Lissa832Lissa832 member
    I was 24 weeks pregnant with DS when we went home for Christmas.  We had a shower then because it was the only feasible option for us. Unfortunately, a week earlier, at 23 weeks, the u/s tech told us it was a girl.  So, I got all gender specific things at my shower.  At 30 weeks, we found out that our girl was actually a boy.
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  • Bexx24Bexx24 member

    thanks for your help every, your suggestions mean a lot. And yes, I'm going to do the best I can to make some connections around here so I can get out of the house LOL!

    Thanks again. :-)

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  • jlewis121186jlewis121186

    join a playgroup, lol...check out www.meetup.com  they have all kinds of groups...i am a part of a playgroup here...

    i would do option a btw

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  • SandK042SandK042

    Option A all the way.  Have fun with it!!

    I'm dealing with a similar issue, although with a monkey wrench.  My best friend is also expecting baby #1, about 8 weeks before me (her, March; me, May).  So I'll be going home in Jan to throw her shower.  That will probably be my last chance to be there before start of 3rd trimester (doc says no flying after that), so my shower will have to be the same weekend.  Doing a joint shower would be WAY too big, so looks like we'll be having a Saturday/Sunday combo.  Sigh!!!

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