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Babies: 3 - 6 Months
My UO - Spanking
Let me go ahead and say, I'm posting and running, because we have a million frikkin errands to run today. =[
Here it goes:
I believe in spanking. However, I agree with the mindset of "spanking = hitting".
Let me explain. I was spanked as a child, with a paddle of some sort. My mom used ping pong paddles when my sister and I were in diapers, more for the sound effect than pain. As I got older, my dad made a wooden paddle.
I think that people who spank with their hands border on the "hitting" issue. Not abuse, but a lot of ladies on here say that it encourages hitting, and I agree.
I knew that the paddle was for discipline, and that it was never ok to hit anyone with anything, even at a very young age.
My best friend in elementary was spanked, with her parents hands, and she was terrified of people who raised their hands to her. She wasn't abused, that I knew of, but the spanking with hands scared her.
I know that not very many people agree with me, and that's fine, that's why it's a UO. Most of this comes from personal experience.
Have a great day ladies!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: My UO - Spanking
I know you're not here to reply. However, if spanking with a hand makes one afraid of people raising their hand. Couldn't one be just as afraid from a belt, ping pong paddle, wooden spoon, when those items are being used for their purpose?
There was a story a while back about a school that was having a lot of behavior problems. A new principle came in and decided to use a wooden paddle as a deterrent. I don't think it was every actually used, but just the threat of it shaped up the kids. It was a really interesting story.
Personally, I will not spank my kids b/c my dad yelled at me and spanked me when I was little and rather than getting me to behave, it just made me hate him with a passion and fantasize about hurting him.
I don't want my kid to feel that way about me.
OMG, that's terrible!
That's what I was thinking too....
I also believe in spanking but in very rare cases. My parents spanked but I can honestly say that I don't remember it happening more than a couple times in my entire life. They worked hard to make sure they had other "weapons" in their arsenal, if you will, and a stern look/talking to usually did the trick.
My mom used to use a flyswatter in the summertime across my legs, ouch. I thought that was mean. It seems like anymore, you do anything towards your children anymore even spanking, many people call it child abuse and it could be possible cause of being thrown in the slammer.
I don't believe in it, I think there are other ways like I said yesterday like grounding them, sending them to their room, or taking something they really like away from them for a couple of days.
Ok, I lied. Freaking H left the lights on in the car and the battery is dead. Again. This is the 3rd time in 2 weeks. He's used to driving his car, with automatic lights.
*sigh*
Anyways, I get what you're saying about being afraid of the paddle, spoon, what have you. I really do. I guess spanking is all about personal experience. I was never afraid of the paddle. Ok, maybe I was "afraid". I knew that when I screwed up, I was getting a spanking, so I was afraid to do something that was against the rules.
You announced this so nonchalantly...if you know your brother is abusing his son why aren't you reporting it?
I always see these type of posts go up in flames....
But anyway, as the parent of a 10 and 6 yr old, I can honestly say that we have had to resort to spanking very few times in our household, so few that I cannot even remember the last time either of my children were spanked. I was spanked as a child, but very infrequently. My parents only had to raise their voices and I would behave, how that happened I have no idea....
No sh!t!! My thoughts exactly. You need to report him and protect your nephew.
Married 10.11.08
Baby LJ 05.21.10
TheRookieChef.com
Yeah, this. As someone who has been fraudulently reported to CPS and knows what a big deal it is... your brother needs help, and so does his child. That is not discipline, it's violence.
I was spanked as a kid. I don't feel like I was abused. But I also feel like my parents did it because they were lazy and that was "easy". There are a lot of other things they could have used as a means to discipline.
I look at my daughter and I can't see spanking her. I just can't.
Thank goodness, your poor nephew.
I totally agree with this. I have a cousin that could've used a good swift spank to get him to straighten up. I was spanked with a wooden spoon and will never do that myself, but I believe in giving a good swat to the butt when some kids misbehave. Just depends on the kid and if "timeout" or another disiplinary measure works 1st.
This!
Sorry if this is a double post. TB is being weird.
"My best friend in elementary was spanked, with her parents hands, and she was terrified of people who raised their hands to her. She wasn't abused, that I knew of, but the spanking with hands scared her."
This is how I was spanked. DH would NEVER hit me, but when raises his arms (as if to say WHAT NOW) and I still wince.
Of course my mom spanked also with a flyswatter, belt, ping pong paddle, etc. I am not scard of those things. And I'm not scared of someone raising their hands to me. I think it's just an instinct.
We haven't come to a point (obviously) of any discipline. Spanking is not ruled out. We will start with time out when the time comes, but I can tell you from growing up, time outs don't always work. We'll just see how LO does with it when she is older.
hitting your child is never best. its lazy.
there are a million parenting techniques out there. if timeouts and having things taken away are your only ideas - get to learning.
I could have written this. My dad never spanked us, but my mom did (with a wooden spoon!). I don't feel like I was physically abused. However, looking back, I do feel my mom was pretty lazy. She never wanted to be a mom, so when we were bad it just aggravated her even more. My dad wanted us and when we were bad he would sit us down and talk to us - it worked much better than the spankings!
As for my own DD? I can't say I'll never do it (I know my dad spanked my brother once when he ran out into traffic - I think that it's just an instinctual response), but I don't plan on using it as my main means of discipline.
Eleanor Noelle - 18/05/12 Claire Elisabeth - 16/-5/10