Pregnant after a Loss

sad update really need t&p

I am going to the neonatologist today in about 2 hours, to confirm if my baby has a cystic hygroma. However, as before my last miscarriage, I woke up this morning with a horrible feeling. Like the baby had passed. I have no sore boobs at all, stomach is TOTALLY flat today (has been bloated) and I have absolutely no nausea. I hope to God I'm wrong, but like I told my husband last night and before the last miscarriage, I knew something was not right all along. I am really gearing myself up for horrible news today, then anything else will be a surprise.

I'm trying to figure out how I will go to work today after this. I cried yesterday for 12 hours straight after I was told by my horrible OB (see earlier posts from yesterday for details on that). I don't know if we can try again after this. It would be our third loss. And apparently something is genetically mutant about me. I'm really depressed and sad. And will probably lose my job because I will have to take off this week and next (the first 2 weeks of school) to deal with my mental breakdown. I already have depression and anxiety (haven't been on meds for 2 years while undergoing fertility treatments) and I think this loss may do me in.

Please pray for us. 

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Re: sad update really need t&p

  • {hugs}  I am so sorry you are going through all of this.  Just so you know, you should be able to use some FMLA time as long as your doctor will give you a note and you cannot lose your job for that.  I'll be praying for you.
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  • *hugs* You're in my T&P.

    Can you tell work whats going on? Maybe just the principal (gathering you work in a school)?

    I hope you receive positive news today.... but if not... going back on your meds and having testing particularly chromosome testing on you and DH may provide some answers.

    more *hugs*

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    4 losses (cp Feb 28 09, mc April 9 09 (5w5d), mc Aug 10 09 (7w1d), d&c Apr 12 10 (grew to 6w3d, mc confirmed at 8w5d). RX: Overies PCOS (hormones normal) & Balanced Translocation of Ch. 7 & 13 (40-50% mc risk)

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  • I wish I could just reach out and hug you right now. I am so sorry. i will be praying for you.
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  • Oh honey...I am so sorry you're dealing with this. Whether you believe in them or not, I'll pray for a miracle for you and your husband and your LO today.  Please keep us updated on the results.  And your job should understand.  Have your husband explain what's going on to your bosses and they should be understanding.

    Praying so hard for you right now.

  • You and your dh are in my thoughts and prayers.  I am so sorry you are going through this.
    BFP #1- 12/3/09, EDD- 8/7/10, Missed M/C at 8 weeks & D&C- 1/5/10, BFP #2- July 2010, Baby Charlie Born March 29, 2011, BFP #3- 4/12/12- EDD- 12/21/12, Missed M/C at 10 1/2 weeks 5/29/12, D&C 6/1/12- testing results showed triploidy, IF testing all normal, February 2013- IUI#1, femara, follistim, trigger =BFN, March 2013- IUI#2, femara, follistim, trigger= BFP #4, 3/20/12, Beta#1 16dpo= 397, Beta #2 18dpo= 1037, Beta#3 24dpo= 11,589- EDD 11/30/13- It's a Girl!!! Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker BabyFruit Ticker
  • i am so sorry and will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers today.  take care.
  • I am so sorry you are going through this. I wish I could give you a hug. I agree with everyone else, try to talk to your boss or have DH do it. The FMLA suggestion is a good one. If you can get a note then they can't fire you. I would think anyone would understand that you need a mental and emotional break.
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  • I'm so very sorry you are going through this!! :::HUGZ:::
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  • (((Hugs)))  I'm so sorry you are going through this.  I hope work is patient with you as you cope.  Good luck today.  Still hoping for better news today!
  • I'm so sorry. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
  • big hugs, I am so sorry. thinking of you.
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  • I'm still holding out hope that things will be alright.  If they're not, I agree that you should try and use medical leave if you can.  Your health is more important than any job.  I'll keep you and LO in my thoughts.

    ---------------------------------------------------------------
    4 early losses 2009, 2010, 2015.  Baby #1 born 2/13/11.  
  • I'll be thinking of you today. Good luck.
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  • Sending LOTS of T&P your way... I really hope that your appointment today turns things around and everything is GOOD.

     

    BFP #1 4/2/09 EDD 12/6/09 -MC 4/12/09 BFP #2 6/2/09 EDD 2/14/10 -Ectopic in Tube, Surgery 6/23/09 BFP #3 10/15/09 EDD 6/27/10 -Daniel John 6/21/10 BFP #4 Oct 2010 Chemical Pregnancy BFP #5 8/19/11 Beta #1 82.8 Prog 17.25
  • I'll be thinking about you and your LO today.  I hope you get good news.  ((hugs))
  • (((hugs)))

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  • Definitely thinking of you.  Please oh please set aside your work-related stuff and allow yourself to just be at this appointment today.  The work stuff will work itself out - you might need a doctor's note and you might need to tell your boss about what's going on (or HR if your place is big enough), but please don't let that be another thing weighing you down right now.

    I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers today. 

  • I'm so sorry you're going through all of this. I'll be thinking of you today.
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  • I am so sorry. I hope you are wrong and get good news today. You and your family will be in my T&Ps.
  • I am so sorry you are going through this.  I hope your work is able to understand what you're going through, definitely talk to your doctor about FMLA. Huge hugs and T&P to you.
    BFP 4/23/09. D&E 7/17/09 16W5D. BFP #2 3/10/10. EDD 11/15/10 Babycakes was born 11/5/10! Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I am so, so sorry you are dealing with this. T&P to you. Please ask about FMLA and try to take care of yourself.

    FWIW, with my first pregnancy I KNEW something was wrong and nobody could convince me otherwise. (There actually was something found later, and I miscarried.) Sometimes intuition sucks.

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  • I'm so sorry you're going through this.  You're in my T&P.  ((big hugs))
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    BFP#1 1.28.10; HB 6w5d 2.18.10; No HB 3.8.10; Natural m/c 3.9.10 at 9w3d
    BFP#2 - 7.22.10 DD born 3.16.11
    BFP#3 - 8.11.11 DS born 3.27.12
  • I am so sorry you are going through this. Please make your top priority taking care of you, baby, and DH. I do hope you get more hopeful news today, but either way, my thoughts are with you.
    Mommy to Alden, born May 19, 2007 - best birthday present ever! natural m/c October 20, 2008 at 8w1d BFP April 4, 2009! Missed m/c discovered May 1, 2009 D&C May 12,2009 BFP March 3, 2010 Chemical pregnancy BFP May 25, 2010 Elias Derek born January 26, 2011! Surprise BFP October 24, 2012 Missed m/c confirmed Nov 26 D&C Nov 30 Surprise BFP February 13, 2013
  • I am so sorry, many thoughts and prayers coming your way.
    TTC#1: 14 months on our own (did HSG, b/w, SA);
    BFP on Cycle 14--TWINS! Identical twin boys stillborn at 19wks(1/9/10)
    3 break cycles; took clomid 50mg, BFP #2 Beta #1 35, Beta #2 338!!! Owen was born 2/11/11! 
    TTC#2: 4 cycles on clomid: BFNs
    BFP #3: Cycle #5 100mg clomid; beta #1 21; beta #2 6=CP 
    Cycle #6 break cycle TTC no meds=BFN
    Cycle #7: 150 clomid+ovidril+IUI=BFN (switched to RE)
    Cycle #8: follistem+ovidril+TI=BFN
    Cycle #9 Forced break due to cyst
    Cycle #10 follistem+ovidril+TI=BFN
    Cycle #11 follistem+ovidril+TI=BFN
    Cycle#12 Forced break due to cyst, went on BCP; did repeat HSG, Saline U/S
    Cycle #13 IVF: Follistim/Menapur ER 11-30 11 eggs, 5 mature, 4 fertilized and 3dt on 12-3; BFN
    Cycle #14: IVF#2 lupron/follistim/menopur ER 1-22, 19 eggs, 14 fertilized, 5dt on 1-27, BFP!! beta 1: 63, beta 2: 119; EDD 10-15-13; 1 frozen embie
    Miracle Surprise BFP, EDD 10-1-15; saw HB great Betas, 11weeks lost baby MC at home
    Moved forward with FET transfered solo frostie on 6-4-15, beta 1: 315, beta 2: 738, u/s showed one baby on track EDD 2-21-16
  • I am so sorry you're having to deal with this. I really hope you get some good news today.

    If not, I would seriously talk to your NEW OB or someone about starting meds again. It's important to take care of yourself too.

    (((hugs)))

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  • I'm so very sorry you're dealing with this. I hope that your appt shows a very healthy baby and your jerkoff OB was very wrong. Sending my T&P's.
  • I am so, so sorry...  Sending you lots of T&Ps.  [[hugs]]
  • I am so sorry. I agree with FMLA and talking with your principal. This is a medical reason to be out- if someone broke their leg and had to be out the first two weeks of school, they wouldn't be fired- no reason you should. I am a teacher and while I wasn't out the first two weeks, I was out often because of m/s and then a full week because of my m/c at the beginning of last school year. As long as you have documentation, they cannot fire you. 

    As far as anxiety and depression, do you see a talk therapist. I was on medication and stopped when we began ttc. I continue to see a therapist who has been very helpful to me. Also, I am not sure if you have a union, but mine has a call center we can use if we are having a crisis or need to talk about a problem. It is run by the state- I've never used it, but I believe my MIL did and was happy with it.

     I am thinking of you and sending you lots of T&P.  

    Three losses in 2009, a miracle in 2010! Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker The Method to My Madness, a PPD blog
  • ((hugs)) I am so sorry you are dealing with this.

      Rylan 1/27/2011, 2:42 pm, 5lbs 12oz, 18.5 inches long
     Ayla 10/02/2013, 10:14 am, 6lbs 14oz, 19.25 inches long
    Missed Miscarriage 6w3d 3/02/2010
    I'll hold you in my heart until I hold you in heaven
    .

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  • I am so sorry you are going through this!! I will definitely keep you in my T&P's!!
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    diagnosed with heterozygous Factor V Leiden 2008; m/c 11/09 @ 5 1/2 wks; m/c 5/10 @ 4 1/2 wks; RLP testing done, diagnosed with antiphospholipid syn. and low progesterone; 7/10 started on Heparin injections & progesterone supps @ 3 dpo, BFP 8/9/10!!! Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker BabyFetus Ticker
  • I am so, so incredibly sorry to read this. Your family is certainly in my deepest and sincerest thoughts and prayers. I hope you don't give up, there is always, always hope and you just can't imagine life's blessings that could be waiting just around the corner for you, truly. Please take care of yourself and know that we are thinking of you.
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  • I'll be praying that you get good news today.

    As for giving up, only you know what's best for you. DH and I suffered 3 losses, no testing and said that this would be our last shot. It is extremely emotionally and psychologically draining .  

    Marie, wife to Ron, mom to DS
  • I am so very sorry; my T&Ps are with you and your husband. I do hope everything is okay!
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