Trouble TTC

I lost the baby

Thanks to everyone who was thinking of me over the past couple of days but unfortunately, I lost the baby.  At my u/s on Sunday the tech saw a small gestational sac and today by uterus was empty.  I now have to wait for my beta to drop.

I am devastated and can't believe this actually happened.  I have shed so many tears over the past three days and my heart aches for the baby I will never get to hold.

I now feel more blessed than ever that I have such a wonderful DD.  She is a true miracle in my eyes.  DH and I talked a lot over the weekend and we both feel that it is time to end our TTC journey.  We feel like we need to move on and be happy with our life and show our DD nothing but happiness and love. 

Thanks so much for the amazing support and I am rooting for each and every one of you during this roller coaster of a journey.

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Re: I lost the baby

  • I'm so so sorry:(  (((((hugs))))
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  • Oh, Reb, I am so sorry.  My heart breaks for you. 

    I'm so glad that your precious DD brings you and YH comfort.  I wish you all the best and you and your family are still my thoughts and prayers.

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  • I'm so unbelievably sorry. This post breaks my heart. Take care of yourself, Rebelina.
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  • Oh god, I am soooo sorry.  I know no words can ease your pain or make this any easier, but know that you're in my thoughts and prayers.
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  • I am so very sorry, Reb.  ((hugs))

    imageimage


    ~SAIF/PAIF/Everyone Welcome~ 

    Me= 37 and DH = 41 

    Dx: DOR, Endo, APA+ (really high beta 2 glycoprotein antibody and high everything else tested), heterozygous MTHFR mutation, positive for lupus anticoagulant, high FSH, low AMH and both tubes blocked (per HSG on 3/8/11)

    IVF #1 - long lupron (with HGH, intralipids, lovenox and BA); 4 retrieved, 3 fertilized; ET 2 blasts and 1 frozen = BFN

    IVF #2 - a version of antagonist with EPP (with HGH, intralipids, lovenox and BA); 6 retrieved, 4 mature, 3 fertilized, 2 blasts and 1 frozen blast transferred on day 5 = BFN.

    IVF #3 April was postponed to May, May was canceled. June/July was canceled. Had a cyst aspiration and then began IVF #3 in August. ER on 8/22; ET on 8/24 with AH. +HPT on 9/5. Beta #1 (11dpo) = 3; Beta #2 (15dpo) = 29; Beta #3 (17dpo) = 60; Beta #4 (19 dpo) = 118. Heartbeat at 6 weeks 6 days =132.  Lil is here!

    TTC#2:  Trigger + TI = BFN; Clomid + Trigger + IUI = BFN.

    IVF #4:  BCP + MDLF + Lovenox = 7R, 1F = Transferred 1 6-cell embryo on day 3 = BFN

    IVF #5:  MDLF + Lovenox = 4R, 1F = Transferred 1 10-cell compacting embryo on day 3 = BFN

    IVF #6:  (New RE):  Long Antagonist November 2014 (transferred two 8 cell grade 1 embryos and froze one blast) = BFN

    FET#1:  BFN

  • Oh Reb, this breaks my heart.  I'm so incredibly sorry sweetie.  Please, if you need anything at all, feel free to PM me.  I hope that you find peace very soon.  (((huge hugs))) and lots of love.
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  • I am so sorry for your loss.  It truly makes my heart break.  You are such a kind person.  I will be keeping you in my thoughts.  I wish all the happiness in the world for you and your family.


    His three plus my one; we are all excited to welcome a little one!

    Pregnancy Ticker

  • I'm so sorry for you and YH.  I know I can't say anything to make it better but my prayers are with you both as you navigate going forward. 
  • I'm so sorry. Still in my T&P. 
    Married to the love of my life since 2005
    TTC #1 - 
    BFP # 1: 5/2006 - m/c @ 6 weeks (natural) / EDD 1/17/2007
    BFP # 2: 7/2007 - chemical pregnancy / EDD 3/18/2008
    BFP # 3: 6/2013 - 7/9 u/s: No hb, measuring 2 weeks behind. Very high HCG#'s 7/21 u/s: No change, ruled out molar pregnancy. Completed Natural Missed M/C 7/26/2013 / EDD 2/5/2014
    TTA with Diaphragm. 
    CFNBC
    I didn't want to kiss you goodbye, that was the trouble; I wanted to kiss you goodnight. And there's a lot of difference. - Ernest Hemingway 

    Licensed foster family. No current placements. Open to adoption but that is not our goal and as such we don't have dual foster/adopt home study.
    2012-2013: Former Foster Mommy to 1 bubbly little 8 y.o. girl that has moved onto an amazing adoptive home.

  • I am so sorry! I know there is nothing I an say to help ease your pain, but just know that I am thinking of you and your family!
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  • Oh Reb, I am so so sorry. Many hugs to you & your husband. 
    Our IVF Miracles! Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
  • Reb, I am so, SO sorry! ((HUGS))
  • Oh Reb, I am so very sorry. Please know that I am here if you need to talk. ((huge hugs)) I wish there was something I could do or say to help.
    Infertility, Life & Loss Blog
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    Love & luck to my 3TC girls. Congrats to Omega-The boys are here!
    If there's one thing I've learned while waiting my turn,
    it's that in each life some rain falls but you also get some sun.
    After 2 years & 2 losses, our little man arrived 8-2011.
  • I'm so sorry for your loss Reb. You and your family will be in my T&P.
    image
    Helene (Nova726)'s book recommendations, favorite quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf) Follow Me on Pinterest
  • Oh God Reb.  I am so so sorry.  My heart breaks for you and YH.  I hope you both find peace soon.  I will continue to have you in my thoughts and prayers.  I wish there was something I say or do for you to help ease the pain.  Big hugs hon.
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  • I am very very sorry Reb. T&Ps.
    TTGP since 09/09, BFP 10/6/10 Our little Bean was born on 06/16/2011! Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPicBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I am so sorry for your loss. :(  (((huge hugs))) Sending T&Ps your way.

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  • I am so, so sorry for your loss.
    image
    4 Clomid cycles + 3 IUIs w/ injectables + 1 IVF = 1 m/c, 1 ectopic
    FET May 2011 = BFP! Beta 1 (8dp5dt): 336, Beta 2 (12dp5dt): 2033, Beta 3 (14dp5dt): 4706

    ? So thankful for our little guys, born at 33 weeks. ?
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  • Oh Reb....I'm so so sorry. this post is breaking my heart!  Take care of yourself!    {{BIG HUGS}}

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  • I am so sorry.
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  • I'm so sorry Reb! I have no words of wisdom to share all I can say is I'm sorry. I am heart broken for you. I understand your decision and wish you all the best. I hope we can keep in contact some way. You can add me on FB mhsieh06atcomcast.net.
  • Reb I am so sorry for your loss.  Please know you and your family will be in my thoughts. 
  • Sorry to hear of your loss.........:(  You have a plan and you are moving forward and that is good!!!
    TTC since 2009 very frustrated 42yr and DH 40

    5 cycles of Clomid with satisfactory response=BFN's
    Fibroid removal Nov2010
    IUI Clomid #1 Feb 2011...BFN..damn it!
    IUI Inject's #2 Apr 2011...CANCELLED...low estradiol
    IUI Inject's #3 June 2011...BFN
    IUI Inject's #4 Sept2011...BFFN
    Lap Dec 2011...severe endo..cyst removed..some remains...
    IVF#1 Apr 2012 ....cancelled due to over suppression
    IVF#2 July 2012....6 follies...only 1 retrieved....BFFN
    surgery suggested to move ovary to an better placement but....we moved two time zones away and are financially and emotionally empty

  • I am terribly sorry ((big hugs))

    Cherish yesterday, Live today and always Dream for tomorrow!?
  • I'm so very sorry for your loss Reb. (((big hugs)))
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  • I am so, so sorry. :(
  • Oh Rebs, I'm so sorry. I hope you can find peace soon.
    Struggled with IF from 2008-2011.
    Surprise Pregnancy 02/11!
  • I'm so sorry, Reb.  Best wishes for moving forward with your family.  ((hugs))
    TTC #1 since 4/09 w/ MFI
    IVF #1, 7/10: Cancelled due to dominant follicle; IVF #2, 9/10: c/p; FET #1, 11/10: c/p; IVF #3, 4/11: BFN; FET #2, 6/11: BFP! Beta #1 = 118 (11dp2dt), Beta #2 = 1975 (16dp2dt)
    DS born 2/17/12

    TTC #2
    IVF #4, 11/13: BFN; IVF #5, 3/14: BFP! Beta #1 = 59 (11dp2dt), Beta #2 = 406 (15dp2dt)
    EDD 12/19/14

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  • I am so very sorry for your loss Reb. You and your family will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.

    **TTC since 10/2009** **BFP 4/15/12- Dx Molar Pregnancy- Surgery 5/15/12 & 5/22/12** **BFP 1/23/14- 1st Beta (1/24/14) 171 2nd Beta (1/28/14) 860** Pregnancy Ticker

  • Ugh, your story just gave me goose bumps and brought a tear to my eye.

    I am so sorry for your loss and wish you all the best.

    TTC since November 2009. DH diagnosed with sperm antibodies. IUI #1 = BFN IUI #2 = BFN On the road to IVF.... Egg Retrieval Jan 21, 2011 16 eggs retrieved Egg transfer Jan 26, 2011 Only 2 viable eggs transferred. 1 IVF, 1 ICSI IVF #1 = BFP :-) 10/3/11 No heart beat at 38 weeks: Our baby Jack became an angel 12/14/11 = natural BFP Rainbow baby Samantha Jacklyn born8/8/12. Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • Oh Reb...I am so truly sorry. I hope that you will find comfort in DD and can find your happiness again.  You will be thought of by me often :)
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  • I am so very sorry.
    TTC #1 since 03/09 Dx Unexplained
    Jan to April 2010 - Clomid - All BFN
    June 2010 - IVF - BFN
    Oct 2010 - FET #1 - BFN
    Dec 2010 - endometrial biopsy
    Jan 2011 - Surprise BFP! - m/c at 6w5d
    March 2011 - FET #2. Thawed 11 Day 1 embryos; 5 'exploded' / possible lab error?
    ET 4/2/11 transferred 1 blast & 1 morula
    Beta#1 10dp5dt =81; Beta#2 12dp5dt =222 Beta#3 16dp5dt =1337
    It's a BOY!!! BabyFruit Ticker
  • HelsHels member
    I'm so sorry for your loss. You and your DH will be in my thoughts.


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  • I am so sorry.  I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
  • I'm so sorry to hear this :(
    imageimageimage

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  • Oh Reb I'm so terribly, terrible sorry. My heart absolutely breaks for you. I will continue to pray for you and your family and I hope this time of healing brings you some peace. Take care. [hugs]
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  • Oh my god Reb, im so sorry hun. *BIG HUG*

    I wish you and your family nothing but the best. Good luck in whatever you decide.

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  • Reb I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. My heart aches for you. I am so sorry. You and YH are in my thoughts.

    IVF #1: 4-11-11= Transferred 1 beautiful blastocyst I named "Nugget"
    5 Snowbabies! Beta#1 4/21= BFP! 226; Beta#2 4/25= 944
    DS born 12/14/11

    Baby #2 FET Nov/Dec 2013

    12/13 Beta#1=BFP 349; 12/16 Beta#2=1,089. First ultrasound 12/26. DS#2 born 8/8/14
    Lilypie Third Birthday tickersimageLilypie First Birthday tickers
    ~~PAIF/SAIF Always Welcome~~

  • I'm so very very sorry Reb, all I wanna do is hug you right now :(
    Image and video hosting by TinyPicImage and video hosting by TinyPicImage and video hosting by TinyPic
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    TTC since 4/09 - Dx PCOS 1/10, HSG: All Clear
    4 Failed Clomid cycles of varying degrees
    Clomid + Bravelle + Trigger + IUI = BFP!!
    Ectopic M/C 9/16/10 ~ Forever in our hearts <3<BR> IVF using Donor Eggs (DE) 6/11
    BCP+Lupron+Estrogen+DE ET+PIO = BFP!!!
    Beta #1: 507 #2: 1561 #3: 4,472 #4: 11,172

    BFPBs Sul06, MrsW722 & SnowflakeBride06
    GL to Mari2003 and all of the rest of the 3T Ladies
    :) SAIFW :)
  • I am so sorry!  (((((HUGS)))) to you!!
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