DH had a total breakdown

tiffanysbride · August 2010

I knew TTC would be hard, Nicholas was suppose to complete our family so I knew TTC would be emotional at points. DH has a major project in the works on week 3 and is stressed, plus his cold and me wanting to practice for next wk lead to a massive breakdown. Who knew sex for fun would be so emotional?!?!

Please tell me you guys had ups and downs during this process! I felt so bad for him, TTC brought up lots of memories of Nicholas and DH was looking through pics, etc. Some days we both can think of his little toes and long lashes as cute, yesterday was not one of those days were our grief had some sweetness.

mommy411 · August 2010

Oh honey I am sooooo sooooo sorry.

Big hugs

RunSchwartzRun · August 2010

I'm so sorry. I can't imagine how hard that must be. I am sure you will have many ups and downs, but it sounds like you two support each other and grieve together, and I think that is about all you can do. ((Hugs))

Sunflower730 · August 2010

It's been 5 months and I still hear Jay cry about it. He's scared to get pregnant againa nd go thru the same thing. He said if we lose another one he is never trying again, his heart is just brken from the pain of losing something he loved so much.

((HUGS))

ColleenS629 · August 2010

I'm so sorry Sad

janiem1120 · August 2010

I'm so sorry Broken Heart

My DH just broke down with me this past weekend. The stress of it seems to much to handle sometimes, with regular life adding in there. I'm so very sorry for you both and I hope it gets easier.

mrsmorris1 · August 2010

I am so sorry. This process can be harder on our DHs than we realize. My DH wouldn't have sex for a long time after our loss because he was so scared of getting pg again and experiencing another loss. It's so tough. Hugs!

tiffanysbride · August 2010

Sunflower730:
It's been 5 months and I still hear Jay cry about it. He's scared to get pregnant againa nd go thru the same thing. He said if we lose another one he is never trying again, his heart is just brken from the pain of losing something he loved so much.

((HUGS))

This is exactly was he fears, another loss. Honestly I can't go through another stillbirth, so if for some freak reason it happens again we'll adopt. I have no disillusions about my strength in that regard. We've been through this 3 times, blighted ovum, DS and Nicholas, so I understand where he is coming from.

EclairAngst · August 2010

I'm so sorry. (((HUGS)))

jamilynn9 · August 2010

Breakdowns in men may be rare, but they DO happen. My DH broke down at a Toby Keith concert bc he said a slow song reminded him of his grandmother. I told him that someone on TB mentioned that their deceased relatives were taking care of their baby. Waterworks instantly (which is rare for him, let alone in public). The healing process is rough.

tiffanysbride · August 2010

Thanks everyone. DH isn't the type of guy that holds it in or anything, but it has been a while since a real emotional break for him. I had one on his EDD and then again after our trip to visit family. Grief is such a strange beast, it really hits when unexpected, something I didn't understand until experiencing it firsthand.

Today he seems to be feeling much better just sick. Hopefully he comes home and sleeps. Heck there are 2 Ambien left whatever leads to rest, right?

ravenorchid · August 2010

I'm so sorry. I hope your DH gets some rest tonight.

Mine certainly has had breakdowns, oddly at different times than me. It's almost like we alternate. The other day I was looking at a book of her photos that I made, feeling pretty peaceful and he totally broke down. I think this is a tough journey for everyone.

TheGregory's07 · August 2010

Hugs to the both of you.

Kristin&Adam · August 2010

I am so, so sorry. Hugs to you and your DH. You'll get through this - we all will.

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